Am I wrong to feel hurt about this?

Morning all!! I rarely buy gifts for anyone now, would rather share a bottle of good vino or a nice meal out!! However, in the days when I was earning a decent salary (!!!!!I do miss that!) I purchased a fairly expensive leather purse and put a £10 note in it - only to have it regifted to me next year - still with the £10!! Actually I’m all for regifting per se but methinks I would have removed the tenner!!

33 years ago my husband gave me a medicine ball. He tends to over think what a person would like - he thought it would be fun for us to exercise together. This year I finally found a use for it -- I put it on top of a warped board on a table in hopes it would straighten it out.

FarNorth

teacheranne why not check with your brother?

I will when I next see him but he’s very defensive of his partner and do not want to upset him with a phone call. It’s not that important really.

Oh ladies, lots of hilarious stories on here, and very sensible balanced suggestions as to how to deal with this. Susan55 I think you have probably explained what might have led to this, so I'll just leave it in the past and as Grandtante has said, wait until next Xmas approaches to suggest we stop buying presents, and perhaps we could just do a xmas coffee out somewhere instead.

Sawsage2

Let's be honest here. I'm sure we all save unwanted pressies and pass them on to people for Christmas /birthdays. As we age we sometimes don't check them enough.

I don’t pass presents on but will donate them to a raffle if I cannot use them. I try to use everything I am given but have very sensitive skin so I cannot use most toiletries.

I received a decanter with two glasses. All new n boxed up. Engraved three initials but not mine. Those of my friends son in law. Obviously an unwanted gift that he passed on to her and which gave me for my Christmas present.

My dad’s birthday was just after Christmas. He was resigned to getting lots of unwanted Christmas presents, but he did object to his sister just sellotaping the ripped Christmas wrap back up again and handing it over with a birthday card.

I once got a 2nd hand pair of shoes from a friend (they were worn underneath) and they were too big

A work colleague of mine re-gifted an address /birthday reminder book. She rang me to tell me that she had done this as she thought her friend may have put her birthday inside. She had. And it turned out that this person had since died. I couldn't keep it and put it in the recycling.

Growing0ldDisgracefully
Maybe the gift is the box the tea came in, picked up from a charity shop, perhaps (if you say you can use it for something else is it a pretty box?) and the tea has been added. Just a thought.

When I was young I regifted a rather nice soap to a friend . She opened it and immediately said “ You were given that by one of the children in your class” . I never understood how she knew as I was only in my Twenties so no memory lapse, but it was so embarrassing I have never done it again.

I always know when something has been re-gifted. An old friend had told me in a telephone conversation about bits and pieces of possessions that she no longer wanted. At Christmas I received a gold ankle chain discussed in the conversation months earlier. I live in a small country village. I cannot think of any social occasion where a late middle aged woman would ever look acceptable wearing such a thing. I always associated them with prostitutes.
Some years later our U3A did a Christmas Bran tub for the Christmas party. I packed up said ankle chain and in it went.
I only wish I knew who had drawn it out, I bet they would have howled with laughter.

My youngest grandson age 7 gave me a lovely pair of earrings this year. His parents hadn't seen them as he had bought them at a school gift day and wrapped them up in class and they were very relieved that they were something I would wear. Apparently his present to his mum was a handbag that she had put into the sale because she couldn't stand it!

Some very funny gifts/stories

When I turned 21 my in-laws gave me a set of huge soup spoons - used in their guest house for years!

Same in-laws once bought our sons a pair of motor cycle gloves each - they were about 6 and 9 at the time. The youngest looked at them and said they were Wally Batty gloves

MiL was a great knitter but didn't usually bother with patterns or sizes - she once gave husband an arran sweater he couldn't get over his head. We have had a good laugh about their gifts over the years - sadly gone now and still missed.

I think we finally realised how far downhill my mum had gone towards the end when she gave me a box of Christmas cards all wrapped up which I had bought for her to write!

Every year I get a card from my brother and he always leaves the price sticker on the back, this year my card cost £2.99 from Sainsbury. He really pushed the boat out and bought me a scented candle from their Habitat range, they must have been beside the cards.

My late mother in law was always re gifting gifts, on numerous occasions I received a gift that I had previously given her but I think the worst one was when she gave our eldest daughter an easter egg that was so old that when she unwrapped it, it just turned to dust in her hand

This Christmas practically everyone has given me a tin of shortbread biscuits. I rarely eat biscuits and am certainly not fond of shortbread.
Some time ago a friend and I decided that instead of buying presents we would give the money to charity.

Way back in the 1974 I put a few bits in the local church jumble sale, including a lurex wrap around top.
Our great aunt loved rummaging through jumble sales, our Xmas presents always came from one of them.
But 1974 Christmas was the funniest yet…….my sister unwrapped her present to find it was the lurex top I had put in the jumble a few weeks before ?

I had gifts from a friend to give to my elderly parents. My friend had known my parents for a very long time. She said she had bought them both a nice dressing gown each from M&S. she asked me to wrap them as she didn’t have much time. I could really tell they wasn’t new as my Mothers had an old handkerchief in hers and my dads pockets in his were full of biscuit crumbs. Yes I was very miffed but didn’t say anything to my friend.

Oh, and by the way, the shop tried to fob you off with out-of-date tea... unless you bought it deliberately for me so I can use the box... If not, I will return both tea and [object] so you can get your money back fdor the tea, and pass on the [object] to its rightful recipient.

My Sister always sent my daughter when she was small a birthday and Christmas card with the message. I will send you a gift when I have got some money which never materialised. My Sister had 5 children for me to buy for so I was really miffed.

My MIL was a past master at re gifting as well as clearing out cupboards in October, ( read Christmas shopping). Every year our adult children would bet on who would receive the most outrageous gift! SIL, one year received an ashtray, (he doesn't smoke) DD1 received an apron, (had been used) DD2 having moved into her own flat received a pillowcase(?) Mr P got toiletries( packaging torn and grubby) I received a heated brush complete with hairs attached, HOWEVER, every year since DS was eighteenth he received a cheque for £3000!!! We just laughed, but fair to say his sisters were a bit miffed. Must say that MIL was as sharp as a tack to her dying day.

My Mil and Sil gave me a box of very cheap biscuits for my Jan
6th Birthday, which the previous week she had shown me as a present from her sister saying "Aunt Lil gave us these for Christmas but they are cheap and nasty so we won't eat them"
The Sil also gave my Dd1 a box of expensive toiletries which I had given her 2years before and which were now in broken containers.

My best ! Laughable pressie was this year. I spend a lot of time with a friend who lost her husband 6 months ago…. she’s not coping. One of the things we were talking about , just two weeks before Xmas , was my missing my bath, which I had to have removed cause my husband needed a walk-in shower! She gave me bath salts for Xmas!!! I’ve said nothing!

I bought an elderly friend a shawl which I thought she’d find useful, sitting in bed. She gave it back to me. “You’ll use it”. I gave another friend a bag of toiletries when she was admitted to hospital in an emergency. I rushed to the pharmacy and bought a well known brand of shower gel, shampoo and other products. All middle price ranged and what I used. (Not wanting to advertise but let’s say a white winged bird). I also bought a rather nice wash bag along with face flannel, toothpaste and brush etc. It cost all told, a fair bit. She gave it back to me when she got home. “Here, you can take this crap back!” Then changing her mind, she tipped the wash bag and emptied out the contents. “I’ll keep this!” While pushing the toiletries at me. I never knew she only used high end products. I unfriended her. Why was I struck dumb at the time!