Am I wrong to feel hurt about this?

I like the idea of passing on gifts that we have been given if they don’t fit our life style or if money is tight. Just don’t see the problem. Buying from charity shops, again what’s the problem.
Tea doesn’t go out of date, it used to come in tea chests from the tea plantations and lay in storage for many years.

I think that Christmasses spent with the in laws can be an ordeal .
I found my in laws house really cold and dirty .Neither did they keep a good table.
We used to eat with the TV at deafening volume on battered trays perched on out laps whilst the cats helped themselves off our plates .
As for gifts -they were awful . Usually secondhand clothes which had been repaired wrapped in the same paper used for years .
I smiled politely through it, but what really galled me was my mother in law constantly mentioning my husband's first wife.
Their marriage was a disaster and finished within a year .

I vowed that my children's spouses and partners would never endure uncomfortable visits, but they don't seem to keen on coming and can't even be bothered to answer calls nor texts !

OmaLoocie that's understandable as you didn't want 'that type' of friend.

Years ago a work colleague 'friend' handed me back the present I had given her for Christmas - a scented candle in an unusual, prettily decorated tin - telling me she preferred to receive chocolate. I'd also bought one of the candles for myself because I liked them so much and thought she would, too! Mind you, I perhaps should've realised her tastes weren't the same as mine when she complained about the Christmas card I'd given her the year before, advising me on opening it that she didn't like that particular type of Christmas scene... Our 'friendship' died a natural death... ?

My BIL always gives my children old Christmas decorations for Christmas. I think he’s slowly emptying his loft. ?

Am I alone in never having regifted a present to someone else? If I receive something I don’t like I either just give it to someone else I know will like it with an explanation, or give to a charity shop. Some of these stories are hilarious though.
I admit that one year my son bought me a bottle of perfume that I had previously smelled and really disliked. It was a popular one and not cheap. A few weeks later I found the receipt in his room and was able to exchange it. I didn’t tell him though.

Kate1949

When my husband was a boy, he bought his mum some sanitary towels for Mother's Day. He could only read the word 'towels' so assumed they were towels for drying hands.

? you remember those awful ones with loops ? A friend of my mothers little boy decided to decorate the sitting room with them a la Christmas decoration. Embarrassing when she had visitors and hadn’t realised…..

I actually gave the horrendous present. In my newly married days I bought a candlestick for a friend and wrapped it. OH said didn’t people buy pairs of candlesticks, not just one? So I rushed back to the shop, got another, and wrapped it. Yes, of course, when she opened them they were different! She thought it was hilarious. I hope her ex still has them, he deserves them!

I, like many others, exchange small token gifts with a group of friends. This year I received a huge M&S hamper from one of these friends. Others in the group received smaller versions of the hamperfrom the mutual friend . Why did I receive the massive one ? It's the reverse of "the packet of tea" but just as intriguing............

This year my husband received a beard grooming set from my daughter in law and son ,he's never had a beard !

Invite her round for a cup of tea and make her drink it!

TiggyW, yes, we all did that years ago, friends and family. It saves a lot of hassle - and you get exactly what you really want too. We just buy a lot for the children and have a little secret Santa (£25 limit) for the family adults with Elfster.

I’m with Martin Lewis when it comes to Christmas presents - agree not to buy any except for close relatives! Spend the cash on what you really want/need or give to charity instead.

My ex MIL gave me 2 pillow cases for my birthday in a revolting shade of beige, but she probably did it delibe3, she hated me, so divorcing her cold unfeeling son was a double win

My step daughter (aged 40) gave me a Christmas gift of a broken Wine Rack, with all the sale tickets on it, including the final mark down price of £0.99!
She hated me, so it wasn't a surprise!

Mirren

Just thought, were you thanked for all your generous gifts and did your friend actually know about the cinema and lifts there and back ?

Mirren
Are you heck being sensitive, i call that damn rude, on top of the socks saga, there is the matter of the money, the cinema, the lift ( petrol and time ) there and back and on top of all that, you are asked for the receipt for the socks !! If that were me it would rattle my cage, so in my personal opinion, NO you are not being sensitive....

I am 2 months younger than my cousin, and I always said she was the favourite, being an only child while was 1 of 4. On her 18th Gran and Grandpa gave her an 18 carat gold locket....I got an umbrella. On my 21st I got £10, she got a ticket for her gap year.

Treetops, that is so sad. My eldest grandsons were born 6 months apart, so I can imagine how hurtful it would be if we were so insensitive as to treat them differently for any reason. What on earth goes on in some people's minds?

Well don't lose any sleep over it after all isn't it the thought that counts.

I was both mystified and rather hurt one Christmas when my step-daughter gave her Dad a mobile phone (they were just becoming mainstream then), and presented me with the nicely wrapped accessories for said phone!

I was ridiculously upset yesterday . A friend has an 18 year old daughter. I bought a small gift for my friend a d gave her girl 2 pairs of nice new socks and £10 .
I also paid for daughter and friend to go to cinema and took them there a d back .... to cheer her up cos she has had a disappointing Christmas with Covid.
My friend messaged me last night asking for the receipt for the socks ... they're too small . I know they don't do bigger so now I have sox back and am to give daughter the money instead!
I know they struggle for money but I felt quite upset and thought it a bit rude to be so mercenary.
I would have just said thank you for the socks and not mentioned they were too small , never mind asking for the receipt!
Am I being too sensitive?

A boyfriend of my DD's once gave me a beautifully wrapped package for Christmas. In it was a cardboard Typhoo tea box full of ........... dried up used teabags! He was taking the mickey as he had been fascinated to find that I would use the same tea bag all day.

My late (ex) MIL gave me the same Perfume, Musk, for virtually every year of my marriage (17) it was foul and I was surprised that all the local Tom cats didn’t follow me around. It was usually accompanied by a nylon polo neck jumper (always white) that was full of static and one year a pack of three enormous Bridget Jones knickers . I was a size ten and wore tiny bikini briefs. Would have been grateful for them now though!

Not suggesting you drink it, but have you made a cup of tea with it.
Another good idea perhaps is have her over for a chat and make the tea with the one she gave you. Could be interessting. And it won't be poison.

DH doesn't shop except by mail order and has little imagination . Last year it was mohair bedsocks a pair of ladies and a pair of men's. This year he bought a hot water bottle with a pure sheepskin cover. THe cat thinks it's her new bed! We live in a 24 hour centrally heated apartment and use a summer duvet all year . I dread the next ghastly surprise .