Ludicrous round robins. Who can be the braggiest.

Dido has recently received £20bn to help the fishing industry. She is procuring some world class fishing rods from Amazon. This after her world class efforts procuring PPE from her old school chums who own a string of dog grooming parlours so are well placed to diversify. Her elevation to the House of Lords was for her tireless service to the economy of the Cayman Islands.

I'm loving these.......very entertaining! ????

Dearest Cousin Phillipa,
Thank you for your usual Christmas update.
When you say that your dear husband is away at her majesty’s pleasure, are you sure this means he has a job at Sandringham?
I’m sure your son is a barrister if you say so but all that coffee making you might want to check the spelling.
Are you sure that when your dear daughter says she is a Madame it means that she has married a Frenchman?
Do you really think that when the neighbours suggested Cacophony they were really suggesting a pop group name for the delightful triplets.

Looking forward to receiving a little gold leaf something, even if it is so last year.
Can’t wait for the goat to arrive, yummy. Oops, perhaps that’s not the intention.

I get some real ones that are very like the spoofs. They always seem to do a lot of travelling, going to their house in France or, in one case, the house in Crete. One last year was so bad I contemplated not even sending her a card this year. I’m jealous, of course, and they are only describing their lives.

Lucca and Lauranorder platinum for my special friends ?

Grandmabatty I shall fly to your Polmont mansion in my private jet, now that I know where it is, to collect my wonderful gift, thank you.

I love to receive round robins from family and friends, thankfully none of them are of the braggy kind, just stories of the activities of themselves and their family. Most of these friemds and family I see, but not always regularly, and of course this year we have all seen nobody.

This year's letters was all about how people coped with COVID lockdowns, at our age,ineitably, a lot of health reports, of ingenious ways of celebrating significant birthdays when visiting and staying is forbidden and how much we miss seeing our grandchildren

Perhaps if the only round robins you get are braggy ones, you need to consider who your friends are and what it says about you.

Monica this is a spoof thread? come on, have a go.

We have spent much of this year in renovating our French chateau ( the Loire Valley, you remember? Surrounded by fields of sunflowers).DH was doing some DIY in one of the upper bedrooms when the floor gave way and he ended up in the cellar, just missing our precious hoard of champagne! What luck...but it didn’t end there, he fell onto a large oak chest we had balanced an old mattress on, and he decided to investigate this ( it seemed to be filled with old bric a brac) but guess what! Underneath were six antique solid gold candlesticks circa 1700, a small box containing about 200 gold French coins dated 1635, solid silver chargers (4) dated 1400’s
And under all those, a really ancient looking Arabesque type oil lamp which doesn’t look much but with a good clean and rub should come up well.....the Arab writing on the side may be readable then, luckily DH can write and speak most Eastern languages well, so we will start cleaning this precious artefact after Christmas, although I shall just give it a rub with the corner of my silk shirt right now, honestly am so busy I
wish I had ten arms! Urrrrrrrhg!

Bit harsh Monica. It’s just some fictional fun, taking the p out of braggers. Doesn’t mean we actually receive them.
I know you’re having a tough time at the moment and hope your husband gets home for Christmas. I hope you join in and make up something outrageous to amuse everyone, or at least read and enjoy in the spirit intended.

Go easy on the rubbing Lemon, once the genie is out of the bottle..............

Oh, missed the point there Lemon. You’ll need us all to start knitting 10 arm sweaters

From my own experience and in particular the one I outlined, Round Robins don't come from friends, more like acquaintances which rather begs the question as to why anyone would feel the need to give a full breakdown of minutiae of their family life, that surely would only be of interest to close family. Having said that and given we are going through an unprecedented pandemic, pretty much all cards received and given this year have mentioned Covid, and of course senders do up date the recipient of deteriorating health of sadly even death. Under happier normal circumstances, often holidays and travel are mentioned. In other words a brief resume of the past 12 months, without the in depth achievements of little Johnnie, is to be expected from friends.

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I definitely took your thread as ‘fictional fun’ LauraNorder (in case anyone has misplaced sympathy for my woes ?) and I wouldn’t dream of listing family achievements in writing!

When folks ask, I tend to say all fine, thanks and move on to another topic.

Brilliantly funny posts aren’t they?

Just catching up, iPads don’t charge if they are not plugged in do they ? ?
I read the post as saying ludicrous AROUND robins.
Fleeting images of Gnetters pulling faces and juggling Brussel sprouts in the garden went through my minds eye.
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Laura I heard about your weekend at Balmoral. Didn't you end up in the Tower for using one of the corgis as a footstool.

I am feeling a bit peeved at the moment as the butler has asked for a rise in pay. He only works seventeen hours a day and has free porridge.

The chef is annoying me too as he was flustered when I told him there will be 200 for dinner tonight. He went off muttering something about Covid rules. Silly man. That doesn't apply when you are as rich as us.

No one would have noticed the corgi AGA if the damned thing hadn’t jumped up suddenly and starting doing press-ups on my leg.

Last year, DH wrote something along the lines of "In March we went on the bus to Canterbury. It was no, 43, on the way home, I had to remember to sit on the same side of the bus to see the other side of the road. In April, we tried a new coffee shop. Not as good as our other one"! etc.... It was hilarious.

We received one such letter this Christmas, alsmost nauseating in its self glorification. Unfortunately for the sender we know different. He has been having an affair, son has been sacked for incompetence, amongst other things and 16 year old daughter is know at school to be promiscuous (our son is at the same one). Take these round robins with a large pinch of salt they may not tell the unvarnished truth.

Missfoodlove love it!

Missfoodlove I’m sure I’ve met Olivia!

I really have received a note on a Christmas card, which read ‘No round robin letter this year, as we’ve been nowhere and done nothing’.

Really peed off at the moment, We got to the airfield where our new jet was waiting to whip us off to the small but beautiful island we purchased last January, we deserve a lovely break in the sunshine after the year we have had. when the aircraft was brought out from the hangar it had a bloody flat tyre and they didn't have a replacement, must remember to sack the mechanic on Monday... so looks like the chauffeur will have to drive us and we will have to stay in one of the villas closer to home, just wont be the same dahlings... too upset to write more at the moment