Feeling like im on the slippery slope!!!

The older I get, the more I find myself avoiding people. So many women just chat nonsense and I find it boring. I do a few group activities but go straight home. I’m happy just pottering around on my own. I’m done with airports, so will only travel in UK, but 2 nights away is my limit. I’m not depressed- quite the opposite- feel very content. You do you and don’t worry.

I got like that during Covid. After 2 years when we were finally allowed out of our socialist prison here in Australia we went for a drive to a cafe and I just couldn’t cope with the crowds so we came home instead. I have readjusted to life now but had to force myself to! I really think you should try to have some sort of social occasion once a week - when you get there it is often not as bad as you thought! At the very least speak on the phone to someone.

For various reasons I find the change from Summer to Autumn very difficult and this year the news is so depressing and friends are struggling, one obsessed by politics, I do go to my group meet ups but am more than happy to be at home

It is the natural aging process Travelsafar when our world becomes smaller

Many of us embrace it and living in the moment helps

The mental acceptance and change are difficult but when acceptance happens, that is when calm and peace descend

Yes, wise words.

I know exactly what you're saying!

I work f/t, so I have to see people, but like you and others, I'm in and out of shops, etc., as soon as I can to scrunch up at home alone- just me and my RoboKitten and RoboPuppy, books and mugs of tea and glasses of cream liqueurs! Oh, and big fluffy throws!

Our planet is a beautiful lady, but it's far too peopley out there for me!

Our planet is a beautiful lady, but it's far too peopley out there for me!

Love this phrase!

Some days I force myself to go to events/do things outside of my comfort zone.

I am often pleasantly surprised and enjoy myself.

GrannyGravy13

Some days I force myself to go to events/do things outside of my comfort zone.

I am often pleasantly surprised and enjoy myself.

Agree wholeheartedly with this, it's often when I really don't want to do the thing that brings the best outcome.
I'm solitary by nature, preferring to go to talks, cinema, concerts by my self & loving alone time but that can feel too comfortable, which then turns into being a 'comfort trap' that I'm reluctant to leave.
It doesn't have to take too much to feel part of things again & I always know when I need to get out there!

I love being out and meeting people BUT it is the getting there that is my problem. I have lost confidence in getting myself from A to B. What with closed roads, road works and new roads I am not prepared to try with added anxiety about parking I am happier staying at home. Will I fall over and not be able to get up when I am out or what if I am taken ill? Given all this, I am happier at home socialising by phone or WhatsApp which is not the same thing.

I'm hardly ever out now,I care for my husband who has Alzheimers.I used to enjoy a trip to our nearest town to do a bit of shopping, now I can't walk far and fall too easily, and I don't mind not going out, I like crafting so I can always find something to do.

Keep going a day at a time. The nights are drawing in which doesn’t suit me. I’m a SAD (seasonal affect disorder) so ready to hibernate till the Spring. Try and look for a positive each day. Take care and get help if you feel no ready to go for it.

I do go out every day, almost but I am more than happy to get home to my cosy, safe space. I don’t like crowds anymore and avoid big groups of friends. 4 is my limit now then I get irritable. I think it is an age thing and I recognise I am an introverted extrovert .
I think you might need to speak to somebody about how you are feeling as talking to an outsider can help you clarify your situation then find a way forward .
Good luck

how old are you ?

I've been like this for a few years now. I don't even go to the supermarket as u get it all delivered.
I took my grandson to ENT yesterday and that's the first time I've been out in real public (apart from the local corner shop) for months and I couldn't wait to get back home.

I don't like people much and don't really like socialising, I, happier alone with my own company.

SpinDriftCoastal I think there are different types of people, those who thrive when in the company of others and always busy, and those who prefer alone time and only the company of those they really resonate with.

Many people are introverts.

I much prefer being alone or with my family.

I am 73. I have four close friends and quite a few acquaintances but I am quite happy with my own company…..😁
I live on my own since my son and his girlfriend moved out last December and I’m quite happy, I do work part-time three afternoons a week in high dementia care home…

I think my post may have been taken wrongly although I live alone I volunteer 15/20 hours a week where I am very sociable and talkative to everyone any anyone
I have a few friends I go out with for coffee What I don’t do any longer is want to be going far away from my familiar places, I go to my beach, alone or with friends, I go for coffee or lunches with friends and I go to my allotment, I go shopping. I don’t go out much in the evenings and I don’t venture far away any more I don’t want to go abroad alone any more as I used to, so I do know things have changed but I m not depressed in any way.
For me I think it’s a natural progression of age other people seeing big changes may be depressed or unwell

I would like to do more but very short on energy at the moment,and have ibs, diverticulitis and arthritis so although not seriously sick I often feel under par. I still work part time and can't cope with much socialising at all.
I'm hoping I can afford to retire soon and will have more energy for the family and hobbies and I long to travel again, having only been away for 3 nights since the beginning of Covid.

I find this thread quite sad.
Though many seem happy with not seeing people.

Genuine question - if the outside world people were all nice, would that make you go out?

Norah

SpinDriftCoastal I think there are different types of people, those who thrive when in the company of others and always busy, and those who prefer alone time and only the company of those they really resonate with.

Many people are introverts.

I much prefer being alone or with my family.

I think it is more complicated than that. There are those of us who do not have a social circle of friends through a group knowing and liking each other after meeting at school, or living in the same road.

For many of us our friends and social contacts come from our meeting up with other people who share our interests, so all my friends come from being in the same local history group, or supporting a particular cause, activities where we are working together for a shared cause, outside that cause we probably have limited contact with each other.

Reading your second post, you seem to be doing pretty well, travelsafar.
The thing is, it's sometimes hard work keeping one's morale up. At least, that's what I find, being an elderly widow without any family living nearby. I like cooking so I invite friends and neighbours for meals quite often.
As for the news, I used to be a bit of a junkie, but feel increasingly disengaged.

I think that you lose a bit of confidence about going out alone if you are ill, under the weather or have health conditions.I used to be perfectly happy going everywhere alone, But now, I have anxiety about it, wondering if I will feel unwell.It's pathetic and I hate it !
However I do see people occasionally and am ok with that.

I am enjoying this discussion because I have been asking myself for a while why increasingly I choose to be at home, usually on my own. So glad other people are doing the same. It was a couple of years ago when I first noticed to my astonishment that I was perfectly happy pottering around my house and garden. When I was younger I would either have been bored, got FOMO, or felt guilty about not 'achieving' anything. I do think its an age thing, but if age brings contentment then it must be good.

Rocketstop2

I think that you lose a bit of confidence about going out alone if you are ill, under the weather or have health conditions.I used to be perfectly happy going everywhere alone, But now, I have anxiety about it, wondering if I will feel unwell.It's pathetic and I hate it !
However I do see people occasionally and am ok with that.

I am quite happy to go to the cinema on my own and also I will go to a restaurant on my own,quite happy to do that..(thankfully, no health issues at the moment)
I think my kids are quite horrified by the fact that I’m going by myself, but I do not need another person with me to validate myself…😁