Towards More Picturesque Speech

My paternal grandfather, when asked to look at something either to mend it or to work out what it was: "Let's 'ave a loook at these 'ere 'errins' 'eads" (these here herrings heads).

I've never met anyone else who has heard that expression or used it. My DDs think I made it up 😁

Grandad was a South Yorkshire miner.

Another one for pulled through a hedge backwards. And when my bedroom was untidy it ‘looked as though the tide has just gone out’.

Some great expressions, but not heard of many of them so far.

A favourite from college years ago - it’s like trying to get muck out of a wooden horse.

Granmarderby10

To miserable moany types -“it’s being so cheerful that keeps ‘em going”

That was said a lot by a character in one of the audio comedy programmes - I think it was ITMA (It's That Man Again). She was a charlady who could always find something to be gloomy about, but when they commented sarcastically on what a ray of sunshine she was, she would reply glumly "It's being so cheerful as keeps me going."

My mother- in -law when speaking of someone not very bright would say in her strong Ayrshire accent ‘ she’s no the full shilling’.

We used to say someone was sixpence short of a bob. Or a sandwich short of a picnic.

Bent as a nine bob note for someone with criminal tendencies (although later I think it was used for someone who was gay).

AreWeThereYet

^My mother- in -law when speaking of someone not very bright would say in her strong Ayrshire accent ‘ she’s no the full shilling’. ^

We used to say someone was sixpence short of a bob. Or a sandwich short of a picnic.

Bent as a nine bob note for someone with criminal tendencies (although later I think it was used for someone who was gay).

We had ‘odd as a nine bob note’ and ‘ bent as a two bob rocket’.

My Gran would describe a very short person as being, 'Two bricks and a hat.'
To my great aunt an African person was, ' Black as Egypt's night'.
Neither very PC.

My parents reminding me to close the door ‘put the wood in the hole’

My dad used to say "plus fours, no breakfast".

Now this related to the sort of middle class that were evolving in the 1920's when he was a lad. There was a particular area of Bristol that sprung up during that time where the residents affected a monied and superior status but in reality they were financially stretched to the limit. Hence "plus fours" (a garment worthy of Bertie Wooster himself) but they went without breakfast to pay for such trappings.

I remember people saying ‘mop and bucket’ for a tall person beside a small one.
Also ‘a big boiling piece’ for someone overweight.

A fat person was, 'Twice round the gasworks,' to my Granny.

Aveline in the Midlands my Mum used to say ‘Once round the Wrekin’.

Sadly we can’t say some of the remarks above anymore, as language seems to have been sanitised.

flappergirl

My dad used to say "plus fours, no breakfast".

Now this related to the sort of middle class that were evolving in the 1920's when he was a lad. There was a particular area of Bristol that sprung up during that time where the residents affected a monied and superior status but in reality they were financially stretched to the limit. Hence "plus fours" (a garment worthy of Bertie Wooster himself) but they went without breakfast to pay for such trappings.

Our equivalent was "All fur coat and no knickers"!

Someone who kept mislaying things would "lose their head if it wasn't screwed on".
"Too slow to catch a cold"

flappergirl

My dad used to say "plus fours, no breakfast".

Now this related to the sort of middle class that were evolving in the 1920's when he was a lad. There was a particular area of Bristol that sprung up during that time where the residents affected a monied and superior status but in reality they were financially stretched to the limit. Hence "plus fours" (a garment worthy of Bertie Wooster himself) but they went without breakfast to pay for such trappings.

Interesting.
Where I was brought up in Lancashire we referred to those who bought expensive houses but spent nearly all their money buying such properties as living in ‘jam butty land’ because that’s all they could afford to eat.

I wonder if anyone has ever heard of ‘soft Mick’. Where I was brought up people would regularly say something like ‘he’s got more money than soft Mick and he’s got enough’. Was always referring to a surplus of something as far as I know.

Yes heard Soft Mick here in Mcr. Also mum used to say she'd seen more meat on a butchers knife for a really thin person.

I live in Worcestershire but born in Birmingham. If someone was rather long winded when telling a story, they were,
"Gooin all round the Wrekin."
For those who might not now what the Wrekin is, it's a big hill in Shropshire.
A few years ago my cousin and her husband from New Zealand came to stay with us. One day we went for a drive into Shropshire. My cousin noticed this big hill, which to her looked suspiciously like a volcano, and asked me about it. I told her it was the Wrekin.
She was amazed. "It really exists!" She cried.
Apparently, her mother, born and raised in Birmingham, frequently used the old saying of going round the Wrekin.
Interesting that a local saying has travelled to other parts of the globe.

My Mum who was Cornish used to say when she was tired, 'I feel like a bit of Ling' and when the weather was nice 'the sun is cracking the hedges'.

I remember my granny talking about an unmarried lady who, according to granny, thought that local boys weren’t good enough for her. She said, ‘ Aye, she let the bunnets go by, ‘cos she was waiting for a hat’.

( A bunnet is a flat cap)

My mother used to say I looked like “the wreck of the Hesperus” if I was going out looking a mess, but she pronounced it Hesprit😁

My DD gave me a new one: a “big unit” for a large person.

hollysteers

My mother used to say I looked like “the wreck of the Hesperus” if I was going out looking a mess, but she pronounced it Hesprit😁

My DD gave me a new one: a “big unit” for a large person.

My nana used to say my old mum looked like ‘the wild woman of Borneo’ if she hadn’t done her hair or was looking a bit dishevelled.

We had some quaint childhood expressions in Liverpool:-

"Same to you with knobs on!" (When someone calls you names)

"God bless you and your one eyelash" (to someone boasting)

"I could eat a child's bottom through a cane chair" (Im hungry)

"As useful as a one legged man in an ass kicking contest" (very ableist but we didnt have all this dreary woke business back then)

Some I have heard of, some are new.
My dear Dad, when seeing a woman 'mutton dressed up as lamb' would say 'the sights you see when you haven't a gun'!
When asked what was for dinner, my lovely Wiltshire 'country bumpkin' Granny would tell us 'chair legs and mangle handles'!

If I ever asked what was for tea - which is what we called dinner when I was a kid - my parents would reply ‘a doll and a drum and a kick up the bum’.