Passed away.

I'm another who doesn't shy away from the words "dead" and "died". They leave no room for misinterpretation & are to the point. I don't like "passed away" and just "passed" is even worse - passed what??

Death is taboo. Taboos are thre for a purpose, as they help us to ignore uncomfortabl facts of life.

Death shows we are animals like other animals .We don't natter about sex for the same reason , sex shows we are animals like other animals.
Humans have always been afraid of death including when not in immediate danger of dying.
Protective taboos back fire sometimes. There are occasions when we really need to call death what it is so we can come to terms with it.

Call death what it is so we can come to terms with it ?

I have come to terms that my daughter is lost to me, she is lost to her husband and three children, her sister .

Do not lecture on coming to terms with loss, passing, passing away, death, it’s all the same

Anniebach

Call death what it is so we can come to terms with it ?

I have come to terms that my daughter is lost to me, she is lost to her husband and three children, her sister .

Do not lecture on coming to terms with loss, passing, passing away, death, it’s all the same

So very true, Anniebach . And people come to terms with death in their own way, on their own terms and in their own time, and no words anyone else can use can really help with that.

Passed from one state to another GrammaH. It's not too difficult a concept.

MissInterpreted you are so right, each individual must be allowed to express their feelings as they choose,

GrammaH

I'm another who doesn't shy away from the words "dead" and "died". They leave no room for misinterpretation & are to the point. I don't like "passed away" and just "passed" is even worse - passed what??

Quite honestly, the misinterpretation comes from those who choose to misinterpret it because it suits their narrative. If you prefer to say, "dead," fine but let's not pretend that alternatives are confusing. I suspect the majority (if not all of us) are more astute than that.

icanhandthemback

GrammaH

I'm another who doesn't shy away from the words "dead" and "died". They leave no room for misinterpretation & are to the point. I don't like "passed away" and just "passed" is even worse - passed what??

Quite honestly, the misinterpretation comes from those who choose to misinterpret it because it suits their narrative. If you prefer to say, "dead," fine but let's not pretend that alternatives are confusing. I suspect the majority (if not all of us) are more astute than that.

Totally agree with you!

Euphemisms can give comfort but avoid reality. Reality is the only basis for coming to terms with loss.

I am with you! But people can use what they want

Grantanow

Euphemisms can give comfort but avoid reality. Reality is the only basis for coming to terms with loss.

I'm pretty sure that anyone who has lost a loved one is only too well aware of that reality.

Yes!
I really resent people telling me I haven't come to terms with my daughter's death, or am unable to face it.

I'm LIVING it.

Frankly, it's ridiculous.

Living it is facing it, MissA ❤️

Anyone who doesn’t understand what I mean by I lost my husband 48 years ago doesn’t know true love

I do not think that what word you use affects the reality of what happened.

I think the use of euphamisms grew up at a time when to talk about death and dying was not acceptable in polite society, so if the subject came up phrases like 'passing away' or 'passing' were used.

I think in the context of this thread it is really a question whether we want to continue to use euphamisms, that belong back in the 19th century when a lady would be embarrassed to refer to a mans trousers, or whether we just stick to the facts.

To me, 'passed' and 'passed away' sound very Hyacinth Bucket.

It's fine to feel that way, it's just when people insist that those who use it are too daft to accept the death of a loved one.

Then it becomes offensive, or at least, insensitive and arrogant.

Very offensive, , critcism of passed or passed away sounds very
much a need to control

My wife went to the next level in Nov 2023 I miss her every single day

I think in the context of this thread it is really a question whether we want to continue to use euphamisms, that belong back in the 19th century . . .

But on here it seems to be really a question if whether people have the right to express death as they choose or to be coerced by others into saying what, in their opinion, is right.
IMO people have the right to use the words dead or died or euphemisms for death without being criticised or ridiculed for doing so.

Well said, Mollygo!

Agree, well said Mollygo the mocking on this thread has been brutal

I was mocking no one. I was looking into the background to euphamisms like 'passed away' and 'passed' and wondering whether they were appropriate now.

This is something that is being done with language all the time. Remember when there was a shade of brown that no one would ever consider using these days.

MOnica for me you mocked those who believe in the promise of Christ ,you mocked faith , no one who believes in life after death speaks of ‘heavenly harps’ you chose to

My experience has been an increase in the use of passed or passed away, in recent years. That has coincided with an increased willingness to talk about death. Including assisted suicide

But on here it seems to be really a question if whether people have the right to express death as they choose or to be coerced by others into saying what, in their opinion, is right.

Everyone on this thread has said what they think on the subject in question. I don't see a problem with that.