Once more today I have been told someone has passed away. It seems nobody dies now. Does it seem easier to say? Don’t people like the word died? It is used more and more. Am I the only one who would prefer to hear that someone has died? I realise I may be in a minority here.
This reminds me of when I was a child and whenever family did a toast at a get together, a popular one was to clink glasses to 'absent friends'. They'd all look quite solemn and I used to think how odd, it's only Uncle Harry who's away on holiday who can't make it. It's literally just in the last few years that I've realised they were toasting the dead.
Oh BlueBelle, I couldn’t agree more. Lost sounds careless to me and I speak as someone whose son died. I find passed etc. odd, far prefer died and dead. But hey ho the world is a changing place.
It's common usage here to say passed away, but more for people that were expected to die of illness or old age. If someone died suddenly, people use died.
My mother was always infuriated by people who said passed away. She thought it was a very namby pamby expression. Heaven knows what she would have thought of Passed! As far as I'm concerned my husband died - I was there and saw it happen he didn't "pass" anywhere.
A lot of people here say the person who has died is ‘no longer with us’ which is quite nice but can be confusing. I was thinking that when people faint they often say ‘passed out’ whereas if you die it is ‘pass away’. I think it might be a regional difference as in different regions of the world use different terminology. Here you often hear that a person is ‘gone’ or a ‘goner’ which is more about a male than a female.
I also dislike ‘passed away’ though it is marginally better than ‘passed’. Passed what, an exam, someone on the street, a rugby ball? My DH was looking for me in a store(a frequent occupation for either one of us when out shopping) and meeting an old work colleague remarked “I’ve lost my wife” and was showered with condolences.
We also say died. It is what it is… but the other day we had a wander round a cemetery, as one does. They can be so interesting. The word passed was on a very old gravestone and it took me by surprise, I thought using it to mean died was fairly modern.
I think,originally' people 'passed to glory' or some other phrase that suggested that they had moved on from this world and were busy twanging harps in the next.
Perhaps the phrases got cut down to 'passed' or 'passed away' when people ceased to have religious beliefs in heaven harps and family reunions.
Passed I think is maybe an American version... my son has used it recently and I've not heard it from anyone in my circle before. He has lived there over 10 years. I don't like the phrases such as passed over or passed away because (to me) it sort of sounds less final - and with or without faith, life of the body, here on earth is gone. Having said that I would usually take a cue from the bereaved and if that's their way of cushioning the blow...
I do hope that when I die I have died though!
"Heavenly Birthday" is new to me! I really don't like that one...
My sister insisted on putting something about how we ‘lost’ dad in the service sheet, which I felt was silly, especially as practical dad would have not wanted that.
I always think when reading the ‘Death is nothing at all…’ poem so often used at funerals, but of course it is, death is huge and life changing for those remaining, but it’s what is going to happen to all of us, no matter what we call it.
Pass away, meaning depart, has been used in the sense 'die' since about 1375; Lay Folks Mass Book: “God lord graunt .. rest and pese Þat lastis ay to christen soules passed away.”
I’m another for the died/dead camp. Each to their own but I find passing, whether it be away or on, going to sleep, being lost, gone away or other euphemisms make me feel a bit shuddery & uncomfortable. My husband was alive one minute and dead the next. Definitely no getting lost, going into another room or passing involved and he most definitely wasn’t asleep! (Apologies if my post offends but that’s how I feel)
I think people use the term passed because they are hopeful death brings a new beginning elsewhere. I am a realist you die you are dead end of your life none of us can escape it.