Regrets?

Being a sibling is great if you get on well - but nothing to envy if you don't.

That's sad, jenpax.

I have 2 brothers and would have loved a sister especially when I see our 3 together. DH has 3 brothers so I have (or had) 5 sisters in law, 2 of whom I get on with really well but it's not quite the same.

I'm in the same boat as you jenpax no blood relatives apart from my children and grandchildren. Can't say it has ever really bothered me though.
My husband has several siblings and they are always falling out and not speaking to each other. My husband is the only one who speaks to all the siblings.

I can sympathise, being an only child of an only child, although my mother had siblings. They all lived hundreds of miles away so I've no cousins nearby and all aunties and uncles have now passed on. So basically it's just me, two children and three grandchildren. Thankfully one granddaughter lives nearby and I see her and her mum quite often. But like you, I often wonder what it would be like to have siblings and I'm pretty sure I would have treasured them.

I have done stacks of family history research and I think that is me trying to build a family for myself. Maybe you should try it. You will find you have a large family, even if they are all deceased. I have forged close connections with relatives who are researching my ancestors, maybe 3rd cousins. When you exchange photos and information you can get quite close to your ancestors' lives and almost feel like you know them.

I was an only child. So was my father. My mother was one of two. My uncle died young.

There is only me but I don't miss the family I didn't have.

I was never lonely as a child and had very close friends as a girl and young woman. One was, I suppose, the brother I never had - but without the baggage of actually being one!

The only time I ever really thought I'd like a sibling was when my mother was dying.

My close friend said she envied me making decisions in the latter stages for my mum as her family of four brothers and sisters couldn't agree on what wax best for her mum who was very ill for years. When she helped me after mum had died she ssid something like "clearing the house and dealing with your mum's things is so much easier when you don't have siblings arguing about what to do and putting unreasonable time frames on it".

I feel blessed to have had great and loving parents. That is enough for me.

My friend and her husband are both only children. There were a couple of aunts/uncles but they are long gone.

They have their own 2 children now plus 6 grandchildren. She says she is glad now they had no siblings because there were no fallings out over elderly parent care, care homes, selling homes, Wills etc.

I’m an only child but my parents were from large, close families. I was lucky to have lots of aunties, uncles and cousins as I was growing up. As the older generation has died I have lost touch with cousins but recently reconnected with one and it has been a joy to reminisce with someone who shares some memories.

Clearing my parents house on my own was extremely painful. I still have boxes which are unpacked because I don’t know what to do with them. I regret some of the things I let go. I would not wish being an only child on anyone.

Did you dislike being an only child in general nightowl or just when you were dealing with the deaths of your parents ?

I think only children can have a rose tinted idea about what having siblings is really like. I watch Long Lost Family and wonder how many people who say "I've always wanted a brother/sister" feel the same a few years down the line

My DH is an only child . He says it has never bothered him. His parents were quite formal and it took him a good while to understand the teasing that goes on in many families . It always makes me smile when something goes wrong or gets broken , he will even now quickly sunny ‘it wasn’t me’. I suppose because there was no one else to blame.
Now there is just his Mum so any problems or troubles with her are down to us. I think he would be pleased if he could share with someone else.

The generation of my parents and aunts/uncles is long dead, but I have sons, grandchildren, a brother, nephew, great-nieces, and cousins. None of them live anywhere near me, so I don’t often see them.

My brother and I get on better now than we ever have before. As children we didn’t get on at all, and for most of our lives have simply ignored each other. Old age and family concerns have united us somewhat. When my parents died my sons helped me sort out their house, with only an occasional input from my brother.

My sister-in-law is the nearest to being a sister that a non-blood relative could be. I am glad to have her.

I’m an only child who always wished for siblings and, despite having some very good friends, I still feel that gap even now. I’ve no doubt that’s why I had 5 children myself, and now 9 grandchildren too! I’ve little contact with any cousins, most of whom were older than me anyway, most are probably gone by now.
Sometimes, as in my parents case, it’s just not possible to have more than one child. But it can be hard, there’s no one else to please your parents except you and no one else to disappoint either! My father died when I was 26, my mother when I was 39. That felt like a lot to manage with no other family members around. But then I look at my husband’s relationship with his 2 brothers and realise nothing is perfect!

I m an on only child of an only child and always longed for a brother or sister I had plenty of friends at school but after I was home there was just me and yes I was lonely I used to play games by myself with my left hand against my right hand
How sad is that !
My dad had brothers and sisters but I never knew my cousins till I found them in my forties and now they re all gone
I ve always wished I had some siblings

I am one of three and we all get along thank goodness! I think we just get on with what we have or don't have ! Only child or one of a group. I think the most important thing is to have had sensible loving parents - that is the best gift ever !

Another only child. Not so bad as a child, a bit lonely but am never bored now as I got used to entertaining myself.
Very difficult as an adult, dealing with the deaths of my parents with no one to really share the grief.
Like Bluebelle I have always wished I had siblings.

Same for me ilovecheese my parents died within 6 months of each other My eldest daughter did help me but I had all the DNR decisions to make it was a bad year

Blood is thicker than water but that does not mean that siblings are better than friends, I am one of 6 and am only close to one of them.

Not my own regret, but my parents immigrated to Canada, and we have no other relatives here.

I envied people with cousins down the street, or grandparents nearby. A few of my friends are Italian descent, with huge extended families. Their family get togethers are so crowded, noisy and fun!

I now feel really warm and content when I have my adult children, their spouses and grandchildren around me. I love all the chaos that ensues! I love that my family has what I felt I was missing while growing up.

I'm one of 6 as well - we all sort of get on and can have quite a good laugh but I'm not really close to any of my three surviving brothers. Probably because I left home early and never went back other than for visits. My brothers all stayed in the same area but they're not that close either. Probably because we are all very different. When my youngest brother was born 1 was 12 years old, and remember having a right old paddy because he turned out to be another boy and I wanted a sister 😁

I regret that my parents decided they didn't like each other, nor me, so went their separate ways when I was two weeks old and left me behind.

Henetha that is so sad.
I hope you have had a happy life in spite of it.

Thank you annsixty...that's kind of you.
My childhood and teens were awful but I pulled myself together after having children and it's been ok mostly.

sodapop

Did you dislike being an only child in general nightowl or just when you were dealing with the deaths of your parents ?

I always wanted a sibling sodapop. As I said, I had lots of cousins and lived on a street with children all around me, in the days when we were out from morning till night, but there was always that time when we went into our homes and I just felt I was missing something. But I still felt I had a very happy childhood.

But the saddest time of all was when my mum died, fifteen years after my dad, and I had to close everything up with no one to help or to share it with. I do know that siblings don’t always get on, and that I perhaps have rose tinted spectacles about sibling relationships, but I would still love to have had one.

As a child, I think like many only children I was a great observer of relationships. I used to watch my mum with her siblings and couldn’t quite fathom how it all worked. I would see them argue and then make up, in a way that I could never quite do with friends. And with my own children, I found the arguing and physical fighting quite alarming although my mum told me it was all normal. But I’ve loved creating my own slightly strange and dysfunctional but loving family, so I count my blessings.

I’m so sorry henetha, that is sad. I do know how very lucky I was to be loved, and by lots of people.