Virtual cruise Lyon to Avignon and Arles

Maw is sad (yes I know, you’ve been saying that for years) however, knowing the constraints of being in polite company I will obey the Führerin about my attire for Pilates as long as John (or any other males present) will be wearing their monokini.
PS you can keep your hat on

John is scheduled to board us later today. Leotards please Maw but not the brown and cream one. It makes you look like a chocolate eclair.

Earlier today, Maw was spotted climbing Spiderwoman-like up the Alain Delon muriel in Cannes. Her suckers have now been confiscated and permission to visit the Fragonard Museum of Perfume has been revoked. This afternoon she will remain on the tour bus with ixion's latest boyfriend, Gauloise Gaspard.

Of course - am I right in thinking John will running our Pilates session later today? Leotards or cozzies?

And pirates and pilates!

That is stunning Joseanne. Is that you, Raymond and a jam jar of cold spoons in the galley?

Puns about palettes and palates would be beneath any of us - so consider them made. ?

For tonight's dessert, and as a nod to the area, I am creating an artist's ? of sorbets and ice cream.

Oh but after a satisfying lick, they slip down the throat so easily…???

May they rot your Cainines. Signed Commander Queeg.

Oooh! That reminds me, Bounty choc ices! Must get Sven to add some to our Magnum order! ???

No, I don't know either. Shocking levels of indiscipline on this ship. My name's not Bligh you know! I will not tolerate mutiny. Only Joseanne is excused because she is doing something cultural. Nor does one bite the hand that feeds. The rest of you are on hardtack for the duration. May the dentist be with you.

Well I don’t know where everybody was at the 6.00 roll call - I made a huge effort to find some decent night attire because of course we are polite company but I expect you old soaks were too hungover (or possibly hanging over the side) to turn up.
So Sven and I have baggsied the best jobs.
?? Official food and champagne tasters. Also cocktails, canapés and pâtisseries.
Oh and as it’s Wimbledon quinzaine we have put in an order for 3 crates of mini Magnums which should see us through the first week!
Come on Tim!

Or possibly rust spots?
Such a romantic place and a rattling good story! But perhaps he just had teenage acne ?

I'm off to the prison on Ile Marguerite to check out the identity of the man in the iron mask. Voltaire thinks he was Louis XIV's illegitimate older brother, Dumas had a similar theory. Anyway, having worn a mask for shopping for a while I want to ask him whether he has permanent tan lines on his cheeks after wearing a mask for so many years.

C’est bien sûr par le cousin français de Banksy!

https://signal-corridor.live/uploads/talk/202206/medium-516570-alan-delon.png%3C/span%3E https://signal-corridor.live/uploads/talk/202206/medium-816631-marilyn.png%3C/span%3E https://signal-corridor.live/uploads/talk/202206/medium-7640-pukkp-fiction.png%3C/span%3E

Thinking about cinema and looking at things to see and do in Cannes, what about Les Murs Peint?

Un véritable musée iconographique et cinématographique à ciel ouvert !

Just a few here. Alain Delon from his film Plein Soleil, Marilyn Monroe and Pulp Fiction.

Others include Belmondo, Depardieu, Chaplin ...

What do you think?

ixion

Er, they don't resorting to eating each other in the film, do they?
I might have to turn vegan, if so.

No, not at all.

You are welcome to become a vegan whenever you wish to do so, it is lovely being a vegan.

Getting political there ixion.

French philosoper Rousseau: Quand le peuple n'aura plus rien à manger, il mangera le riche.

It's that or "a nice bit of squirrel" for fans of that C4 show.

Er, they don't resorting to eating each other in the film, do they?
I might have to turn vegan, if so.

MawtheMerrier

Baggy I be the supermodel!
Note to Ixion
Il y aura de l’instruction pour apprendre aux grandes-mères comment sucer des oeufs

Sorry Maw. The supermodels aren't allowed to eat any food - only pose by it for their millions of Instagram followers.

I should warn you that I am only qualified to navigate a coastline. I can manage at sea by it may be a tad hit and miss. Be ready to be boarded by Corsican pirates or to put your survival skills to the test if we drift to somewhere uninhabited.

I think Triangle of Sadness goes on release in cinemas in September. I read that there's a scene which outdoes Mr Creosote. Not sure I want to see it or one to watch behind fingers.

Joseanne

No worries, Urmstongran. At least en France they cook the Big Mac burgers when you order, not like in UK where they have them all piled up sweating for hours and ready to go.

Anyway, off to Cannes tomorrow. Did you know the film that won the Palme Dior this year is about a cruise which sinks? ? ? ? It leaves the survivors, including a fashion model celebrity couple and a toilet cleaner, on a desert island having to fend for themselves. Apparently it's a frontal assault on the super-rich, and on the capitalist system in general which should appeal to some.

That reminds me of this film.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Admirable_Crichton_(1957_film)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=9YEfSvfyFjs

Anyone with long nails will be press ganged into service oh yuk! I’m so glad I filed mine right down today. That’s me out thankfully.

Baggy I be the supermodel!
Note to Ixion
Il y aura de l’instruction pour apprendre aux grandes-mères comment sucer des oeufs