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True or False

(58 Posts)
annsixty Mon 30-Sept-19 10:48:12

That vast numbers of posters on GN, including me I add, are motivated by jealousy?
I had always thought of myself as a caring and compassionate person.
How wrongly we see ourselves.

lemongrove Mon 30-Sept-19 13:32:33

I have no idea about the thread you mention annsixty but in any case not worth you worrying about what somebody said on here.

Maggiemaybe Mon 30-Sept-19 13:39:35

I haven’t seen what you’re referring to, but of course that statement’s false, ann.

kittylester Mon 30-Sept-19 13:44:06

As ann said, I expect most of us would be envious of various people for various reasons but that is vastly different from being jealous.

DanniRae Mon 30-Sept-19 14:07:11

I agree with all those posters who are saying that they have not seen the thread that you mentioned annsixty but ignore it anyway - sounds like sour grape to me.
Love Danni x

eazybee Mon 30-Sept-19 16:17:24

Is your comment tongue in cheek, DanniRae?
Clever.

Judy54 Mon 30-Sept-19 17:23:16

I don't think the posts are motivated by jealousy but are sometimes judgmental. A previous thread referred to this where it was felt that some posts can be nasty bordering on rudeness. All our lives are different none of us has the right to judge another person's lifestyle and choices. Vive la difference.

GabriellaG54 Mon 30-Sept-19 17:29:40

Envy is more about possessions, jealousy about relationships...or so a dictionary would describe those traits.
Envy being the less desirable of the two IMO.

GabriellaG54 Mon 30-Sept-19 17:32:27

Judy54
none of us has the right to judge a person's lifestyle and choices
Most people on GN do just that.

GabriellaG54 Tue 01-Oct-19 02:08:31

...any rebuttals? ??

Callistemon Tue 01-Oct-19 02:59:48

KatyK I don't understand it either.
However, you never seem to come across as jealous annsixty.

We do come across 'smug' people in all areas of life and I just remember the old saying that 'pride comes before a fall'.

Sometimes I may envy people my age with robust health who never seem to suffer an ache or pain, but I suppose that envy is one of the deadly sins too blush

absent Tue 01-Oct-19 05:32:34

I suspect that people who feel jealousy are quick to ascribe the same emotion to others. Neither jealousy nor envy have ever been dominating feelings in my life, although I am willing to admit that there has been the odd, but quickly passing twinge of discomfort when I felt undervalued or overlooked in comparison with someone else.

I don't spend much time on Gransnet these days compared with when I first joined at the beginning. However, throughout all the years, it has never occurred to me that "vast numbers of posters are motivated my jealousy". Given the wide range of topics over – say – a year, it seems extremely unlikely.

absent Tue 01-Oct-19 05:40:09

Callistemon "Pride goeth before adversity and an haughty spirit before a fall." You can freestyle paraphrase "adversity" and "a fall" from the King James Bible.

Sara65 Tue 01-Oct-19 07:27:24

I’m afraid I don’t know specifically what you’re referring to. But I don’t think you can be jealous of other posters, you Ann, or anyone else, we only see what they want us to see, just a snapshot of their lives really.

I sometimes read about someone’s amazing holiday and think how wonderful that would be, but it’s not jealousy.

You sound a bit down about it, it sounds like you have many friends here, who support you, that’s got to be good.

janeainsworth Tue 01-Oct-19 08:17:52

Like some others, I’ve no idea what precipitated this thread.

But I wouldn’t say ‘vast numbers’ of posters are motivated by jealousy.

I can think of one or two who seem to have rather large chips on their shoulders, but that’s all.

Like absent, jealousy and envy take up very little, if any, of my emotional energy. Perhaps we’re just unusually blessed.

gillybob Tue 01-Oct-19 09:57:15

I have no idea who on earth could be jealous of you annsixty I just know that you are one of the kindest, most warm hearted people I have never met.

I think there’s a world of difference between jealousy and envy. Jealously is a horrid emotion that could end up eating you away whereas a little envy can be healthy.

I love hearing about people’s travels, holiday, trips and plans but rarely get to go anywhere myself. I might say that I envy their trip to the sunshine (wishing I could go too) but I am never jealous or begrudging of someone else’s good fortune.

As I have said on other posts “pissing on your lawn ain’t gonna make mine any greener” is it?

Of course the other side is that some people (not saying anyone on GN) make themselves feel better by making others feel worse.

Eglantine21 Tue 01-Oct-19 10:03:09

I was a bit envious last week visiting a friend who’s daughters and grandchildren live a couple of doors away and pop in and out all the time.

Then she told me that she was taking anti depressants and having counselling for anxiety.

And that she envied me.......

Elegran Tue 01-Oct-19 10:04:15

I find that most posters are not the least bit jealous/envious of others, nor do most posters judge a person's lifestyle and choices. There are a few who do either or both, but that is so in real life, too, and they tend to be the first to cry foul if anyone speaks sharply to them. There are a few also who seem only to have joined to keep up an exchange of arguments on all subjects - I assume that is their form of mental exercise.

blondenana Tue 01-Oct-19 10:04:20

I don't believe that's true, i think on any forum you might get some jealousy or nasty comments but i don't believe it's any different here

harrigran Tue 01-Oct-19 10:16:37

Vast numbers motivated by jealousy.
I have not noticed this in threads.

GillT57 Tue 01-Oct-19 10:41:41

I have not noticed any threads motivated by envy or jealousy, but perhaps I am not too perceptive or good at reading between the lines! Then again, I have seen a good few posts where the smugness and 'I am alright Jack' has put my teeth on edge.

henetha Tue 01-Oct-19 10:46:42

This has never crossed my mind. I am not sure why you would think this. Maybe I'm just naive.

Sara65 Tue 01-Oct-19 10:52:00

I agree with Elegran, it’s easy to be snide and unkind when nobody can see you. Sometimes I think this whole thing is a bit strange, we talk to people we’d never come across in real life, often that’s good, but sometimes , I know there are certain people I’d avoid like the plague, and they probably think the same about me!

Jane10 Tue 01-Oct-19 10:54:29

It does seem a strange thing to think of you annsixty. It feels like it says more about them than you. Perhaps its been said to them and they are projecting it on to someone else, in this case you? Ignore it. Its patently untrue.

Callistemon Tue 01-Oct-19 10:57:41

Thanks, absent!

I didn't know it was a biblical reference - it was one my DM used occasionally!

EllanVannin Tue 01-Oct-19 11:01:21

I've never been jealous/envious of anyone at all, have never " kept up with the Jones's " in any way and never followed fashion or the latest gadget that others have.
I'm myself, an individual and don't have to follow like a sheep.

I really enjoy the forum reading about the ways of life of others, etc, holidays, gardens, foods, everyday problems and ills----the list goes on, jealousy doesn't come into it as far as I'm concerned. It's a bad trait.