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Toilet Talk

(106 Posts)
FarNorth Thu 01-Aug-19 22:11:34

Here is an extract from a very interesting article explaining why single-sex toilets are a good idea, in all parts of the world.

"[I]t seems to me, that toilets are a red herring. In fact, it is not difficult to provide individual toilets and many public places already have them. Their use as a validation tool (‘passing’ as a woman or imposing one’s own gender identity which is opposite to one’s own sex identity, sometimes aggressively so) seems to be the main point. This is done at the expense of and in tension with international campaigns for single-sex toilets for girls and women around the world."

https://uncommongroundmedia.com/need-sex-segregated-toilets-ensure-safety-women-girls/

(Warning : it includes a pic of Mhairi Black wearing a totally tasteless t-shirt)

Rosyanne Fri 02-Aug-19 10:04:26

Using public loos. My friend and I were walking in the New Forest when she had to go. She popped behind a convenient bush and completed her toilet. As we walked away, the ‘bush’ got up and walked off muttering!!!

Loislovesstewie Fri 02-Aug-19 10:14:36

I am very,very fussy about public lavatories. It's bad enough seeing the way some women wash their hands( running a bit of water over the fingertips, no soap and thinking that is clean) without having to put up with wee on seats or floor and other totally unmentionable situations. I really don't want to use public loos which are used by men, and I am against gender neutral loos because quite frankly I consider it to be an invitation to some people to abuse others.

I'm sorry if that is offensive to some, but having been sexually assaulted I don't want others to suffer as I did.

Jillyblom59 Fri 02-Aug-19 10:16:44

I have been in many “toilets” all over the world and I can honestly say that once you have actually fallen into a filthy, stinking hole in the floor, whilst suffering from dysentery, you will be happy to use anything that resembles a normal toilet, no matter who uses it before or after you.
If scarred me so much that I sponsored a latrine so no one else would have to suffer! You even get a photo of it to display in your loo at home.
www.toilettwinning.org/

Tigertooth Fri 02-Aug-19 10:18:13

My friend had a monthly accident and had to wash her underwear and then dry it under the hand dryer and then stand in her knickers whilst she washed the blood out of the back of her skirt. All the women who came in were fab and one produced a nail brush from her bag to help. I just can’t imagine how mortified she would have been to have a man coming in!
I’ve seen similar happen to other girls too.
When young, the loo is our sanctuary on a night out - the gossip hub!
Leave our loos alone, we don’t want or need shared sex loos!

Minniemoo Fri 02-Aug-19 10:20:22

I lived with one of those many years ago, Jillyblom! On a finca with no electricity and the only running water was from outside tap! Nightmare. And no running water. You had to go fill a bucket from the tap and pour it down. All in very high temperatures! And people's dirty feet marks all over the pads where you're supposed to rest your feet. And 'accidents' that hadn't been cleared up. Ugh. Horrendous.

I've been known to moan about unisex loos but that reminder made me appreciate that there's a lot worse!

Happysexagenarian Fri 02-Aug-19 10:20:51

Speaking as an IBS sufferer I often have urgent need of toilets while out and about. Whenever possible I'll go to a supermarket, large store or restaurant/pub as communal public loos are rarely clean. I definitely would not want to visit a unisex toilet in that situation. Neither do I like the automatic coin operated cubicles that are in some places, I always fear the door is going to burst open too soon! We ladies want privacy and cleanliness, that's not too much to ask surely.

henetha Fri 02-Aug-19 10:23:40

Our Tesco toilets are always spotless. But I definitely don't want to share with men! They are not always spotless, and anyway it's embarrassing.
I'm with annepl, -- I detest this gender neutrality thing.

ToadsMum Fri 02-Aug-19 10:24:44

No mention made of disabled or accessible toilets. These are for use by all and usually very clean. Except for one at Malaga airport which surprised me as the airport itself it quite new, very clean and their assistance was the best.
Also a lot of accessible toilets are combined as nappy changing areas. Again no issues.

KatyK Fri 02-Aug-19 10:26:17

There was a similar thread recently. I mentioned that I was in Brixham with a friend recently. She needed the loo and the public one was unisex. She was very uncomfortable as there was a man in there.

seadragon Fri 02-Aug-19 10:42:38

I used a toilet in a new cafe recently and jumped out of my skin when a man appeared out of the next door cubicle. I thought I was in the men's loo by mistake but, no, it is a unisex loo. A women came in when he was explaining to me and she immediately backed out again. I remember years ago arranging to meet my sister and her friend at the brand new swimming pool in Aberdeen. I walked into the changing room and there were men as well as women and children in various stages of undress. It was unisex! I left immediately and went straight to my sister's to warn them. They just laughed and set off without me! She is 11 years younger than I am. Perhaps its and age thing? (The woman in the restaurant was about my age.)

libra10 Fri 02-Aug-19 10:44:44

The worst thing I found in loos was in a nearby seaside town, a man asleep on the floor!

Never been near since.

seadragon Fri 02-Aug-19 10:45:29

Good point Tigertooth. You made me laugh out loud Roseyanne!

FarNorth Fri 02-Aug-19 10:46:46

The article in the OP is suggesting single cubicles, to be used by one person at a time, not the type of shared facility we are used to.
Floor to ceiling walls & door and sink included in each cubicle (some of which would be accessible/disabled toilets). That is, in fact, already the legal requirement for a 'unisex' toilet.

Caro57 Fri 02-Aug-19 10:56:06

I am more concerned about people, of any gender, washing their hands afterwards. At least if I see excreted matter I can avoid it - door handles etc hide goodness knows what

Craftycat Fri 02-Aug-19 10:58:40

I'm just back from Rhodes & I had a strange experience in a loo. The apartments we stay in have a bar that used to have 2 loos-one men-one ladies. This year they have installed a shower in one so the other is unisex but the cubicles are labelled men or women. One evening I went to use ladies & there was a very nice man there with his 2 small girls so I waited for the lady one. The other one was being used by a chap. When the girls had finished their dad insisted he wait outside until I had finished as the lock was broken & he wanted to ensure no-one walked in on me as he knew some of the younger lads used whichever one was free.
I didn't really want him to but he was so pleasant about it that it seemed churlish not to agree. It was all fine but I did feel a bit odd with him outside while I had a wee. I don't know why we are all so odd about what is a natural thing we all do but I do prefer a proper ladies room.
Having said that Greek toilets often leave a lot to be desired!!

4allweknow Fri 02-Aug-19 11:06:13

Have found good and awful public toilets. Supermarkets usually are reasonable. It is a shame that places install a facility and the great public abuse then. I am not for the gender neutral toilets. I have seen men coming out of toilet areas still zipping up, usually waiting on DH outside in say a department store. As for self declaration of gender, beyond belief, does that mean anyone can 'change' gender whenever it suits them.

ReadyMeals Fri 02-Aug-19 11:15:29

I definitely think it's time to ditch that idea of a row of toilets just separated by flimsy partitions. How can you really relax and do a smelly noisy poo with a group of women chatting and putting on lipstick just inches away? Also having self-contained with a basin in the toilet slightly increases the possibility of someone cleaning up after themselves if they "missed". After all who wants to come out to the row of washbasins in front of everyone then go back into the cubicle with wet tissues to clean up their smears. It's just too embarrassing

Barmeyoldbat Fri 02-Aug-19 11:20:31

I will use any toilet available when I need to go, public, supermarkets, behind a bush etc. If I am in doubt about how clean it is, then I simply hover over the loo. I have IBS and always seem to need a loo. Anyway its not good for our health to hang on, so I have been told.

Our local hospital has unisex toilets and I have no problem with them, after all disabled toilets are unisex.

Diane227 Fri 02-Aug-19 11:21:45

I dont like enclosed spaces and try always to use loos where there is a gap at the bottom or top of the door.
It isnt alway possible to find them especially on holiday where often the toilets are unisex.
I Last year my husband stood outside of the toilet door (it opened straight out onto a corridor) to prevent anyone opening the door on me while I was using it. He said never again !!

hulahoop Fri 02-Aug-19 11:27:24

I am one of those people who don't wash my hands because I use hand gel and try not to use hands to open doors I also see people not wash their hands in supermarket then go grabbing trolley and do their shopping if we worried about everything to do with hygiene habits of others we would never go out .

Conni7 Fri 02-Aug-19 11:29:38

Does that mean the men will join us in the queue?

goldengirl Fri 02-Aug-19 11:31:53

I've visited toilets where one is labelled women and the other men - yet on looking in both they are exactly the same! One was in a restaurant. My friend went in one and I in the other! They were both very clean. However some women insisted on using the women's in spite of there being no differences and therefore had to queue unnecessarily.

In my working days in a very male environment there were often no women's toilets available and so I used the mens - fortunately with no problems at all except surprise by those at the urinals when I emerged!!!

Millie22 Fri 02-Aug-19 11:53:04

I don't like the idea of unisex toilets at all. Last year in London we came out of a tube station and across the road was an open area for men to use. I'd never seen anything like it before or knew of such a thing.

RosieLeah Fri 02-Aug-19 12:02:12

If you use a toilet in somewhere like a doctors waiting room, there is usually just one toilet and a wash-basin, used by anyone who needs to. That doesn't cause problems. The problem lies, I think, in the fact that in a public toilet, there are others using it as the same time as you. When it is other women, you don't feel uncomfortable...when there are men present, you do.

Pantglas1 Fri 02-Aug-19 12:08:29

Us girls use layers of toilet paper to wipe, men hold theirs and then open the door of the cubicle.....aargh! And that is assuming they then wash their hands before leaving! Doesn’t bear thinking about does it?

I’ve carried anti-bacterial gel for years now and rub it on before leaving the house and on arriving home. Also use my sleeve or scarf to open doors in public places.