In total panic

Poor Annie I am so sorry you are having to cope with this.

Drug user or not she clearly has a mental problem and if I were you I'd get someone to put a chain on the door at the very least.
Nor would I open my door to her under any circumstances, not even to tell her to go away.

We had a neighbour with MH issues ( bipolar/ psychotic / sectioned several times, arrested, some history of violence and harassment). We got our burglar alarm and cctv at the front door because of this woman who targeted various neighbours she accused of listening to her through the walls or not smiling at her etc, this consisted of sending threatening emails, notes through door, shouting and swearing etc. It was horrible , fortunately she has now moved, but the cctv did make us go feel a bit safer. The police at the time advised us to keep a log of incidents and contact them if/ when she threatened anyone. She did get sectioned a couple of times after neighbours called them. She did have a husband who was her “carer” , but he seemed to ignore her behaviour and was bullied by her as well. I would suggest if the OP feels threatened she should not answer the door to this person - just say “I’m not answering the door please go away”. If she doesn’t go away- call the police. The good thing about the cctv is you can see who is on your doorstep on your phone. Keep a log of incidents. Get as many security systems as you can.

For heaven's sake! How can some posters make a confrontation situation out of another person's distress? Leave it be now. Annie has put solutions in place and is now secure in her home. She doesn't need 3rd degree questioning.

Just read through this thread Anniebach, some great support for you as always as well as good advice about safety. I'd avoid this neighbour as much as possible, wouldn't answer the door or get involved in any way. I accept some may see that as harsh but it's based on life and work experience.

Annsixty, please ignore folks you feel are getting at you. I do believe that there are people who would start an argument in a paper bag. Never been sure what that means, its one of my wise grannie's sayings but it seems to hit the spot.

So happy your son in law that isn’t has fitted your chain and everyone has supported you so well
You must be feeling a whole lot easier and hopefully can forget this unsettling incident Annie
?

Oh Annie I have just seen this. I am so sorry you have been upset. I do hope you are feeling better now. Maybe the silver lining is that you now have more contact with your other neighbours which will one day encourage you to go out.

AnnSixty as Iam64 says ignore the critics. I am at a loss to see how they could criticise what you said.

Thank you all x

I am so sorry my asking for support has caused Annsixty distress ,

For two rather confused posters, I have spoken to my next door but one neighbour a couple of times on the telephone, when I moved here he kindly put a note through my door expressing good wishes for me in my new home and gave
his telephone number. I have never met him but have had
cause to phone him , I don’t know everyone I have spoken to on the telephone.

The man who phoned me yesterday lives directly opposite
me, he sent me a Christmas card from. X and his carers. So I know his Christian name.

Annsixty
vilification by unfeeling people who have lived untroubled lives.
Thank God those of you who criticise have never been there.
Be very careful what you say; you have no means of knowing that.
Some people choose to deal with their problems by sharing them on social media; others choose to keep them private; neither is wrong. That does not mean they have not experienced dysfunctional families, mental illness and frightening situations first hand, and dealt with them.

Please don't concern yourself on my account Annie
The important thing is that you feel safe in your own home.
The right of everyone.

Thank you Annsixty x

Good point, eazybee

If they have experienced such troubling times I would hope very sincerely they would be kinder and more empathetic to those who do share and ask for help.
It is because I have been through very troubling times that I posted.
Please let this lie now.
I seem unwittingly to have turned the thread to one of unpleasantness, the very last thing I wanted.

Good post eazybee.

If this "they" includes me, I would like to point out that I have been through an extremely horrific time in my life.

I don't think any poster here has tried to "villify" anyone. "Villification" was a ridiculous word to use.

I am sorry to intrude on your thread Ab. I am glad that you have had the chain (which I suggested in my early post) put in position. Everyone should have one regardless of age.

annie well it seems something really good has come out of this and the fact that your neighbours have made contact with you.

Perhaps you could build on this by inviting them for coffee etc, and use the time to ignore entirely your issues and instead concentrate on them and their lives etc. You would hopefully have a good hour in your day when you have entirely forgotten yourself.

Good heavens Whitewave I don’t spend all day dwelling on ‘my issues’, neither do I spend all day dwelling on ‘political issues’,

I know annie I hope I didn’t imply that you did, but it was a suggestion that I hoped helped you move on. It was made in good faith and not at all intended to be critical. I know what an hour or two with friends does to my spirits, where we can laugh and chatter - it is like a breath of fresh air, and I was hoping for the same for you.

As I understand it you appear to have spent two years in your dwelling and are desperate to conquer your acrophobia, I just thought this might help you forget it for a while.

Whitewave, I thought your post to Annibach was thoughtful & helpful. It’s a shame Annie didn’t see it as that.

Can’t you get a spare key cut and give it to your daughter? That would solve the problem and you could keep. The door locked. Put up some thicker net curtains or blinds so that she can’t see in and don’t answer the door.
I hope you can sort something out. Hugs

Looking through the replies here I can't see any suggesting you give your daughter a copy of your key. I had one for my daughter to go in with grandaughter after nursery. I gave MY mum one to our house. Daughter leaves it in granddaughter's bag now as I lost it. BAD GRAN!.

Wilma, just before me!

Annie, I have only just found this thread as I have been away, but now returned home.
What a horrible situation this is for you. I haven’t read all of the thread as it’s five pages long and I’ve only just found it, so apologies if it has been said before. I feel desperately sorry that you are having to contend with this woman. She obviously has problems but you must ignore her. I would advise don’t open the door to her, don’t speak to her at all if you can help it. She clearly didn’t know your daughter, and you must hold that thought in your head, whatever she does. That really is the best advice I can offer, just have nothing whatsoever to do with her.

Hi Anniebach, I hope today is better than yesterday ??

Annsixty your posts are all kind and thoughtful ?

I totally understand how unsettling it is to think someone may be prowling around your home, looking through windows etc.

There are some quite colourful characters around here (to put it nicely) and I'm always sure not to look at them or engage; in short, not to give them any thoughts that I may like them to visit.
The thought fills me with dread!

Home is my sanctuary, and I strive to keep it that way.

I would be quite frightened if someone came here, uninvited, even though my circumstances are different to Annie's.