Suddenly realised I was getting old!

It's just getting older. I'm sure it happens to a majority of us old 'uns. Doing something and questioning how to do it, putting things away safely then not knowing where they are, forgetting the Pin number you've had for at least 30 years losing track of what you were talking about, pouring boiling water into a coffee jar to make a cup of coffee. Don't worry about it it's all perfectly natural.

It has happened to me too. And quite often I have a moment when my mind goes blank. I think it happens when we are stressed, upset, overworked, and have so much on our minds.Or blame the hormones. I remember once I could not remember where I had to go next for my job (I work in the community) I managed to get to a car park and had to ring the office to ask what was on my calendar. As someone posted, with Dementia you dont know you have forgotten so that makes me feel a little better.

Thank you Craftycat for this post and to all who have shared similar experiences. It has been reassuring for me because it happens to me from time to time. I was really alarmed when I couldn't remember a simple recipe, a meal I had been making for years. I knew what the meal was but I just could not remember what ingredients to put in and at what point.

This is different from being absent-minded.

When I get a bit stressed I found my mind just doesn’t click in its as if I just can’t remember. I,suppose we have to accept it’s part of growing older.

I have done almost all of these. And felt worried about it. Left shopping and the food bags in the shop.

Got in a silly muddle trying to swap a coin for a trolley token .

I had to pick up my car from the garage and OH took me there. I followed him to start with and lost him.

That was not somewhere I did not know but I got totally lost at a motorway junction round about. I got sent off in the wrong direction more than once and trying to get to my home was a nightmare.
I went back and forth about three times to get onto the road I needed then, I was about five miles away again but at least I could eventually see my way to where I should be.

I had known that road that for 30 + yrs. Yes I am getting nervous
Others do seem to understand as well. For which I am very thankful.

It helps to know others experience this. Somehow I find it reassuring but I am not sure why.
Take care.

Yes, Lisalou, my husband has more than once told me that I have not done something that I had promised, or that I have said something I have absolutely no recollection of. I honestly do not know whether it is my memory or his that is at fault when this happens.

If it is always the same person who says you have not done something you promised etc. then like me you will be left wondering whose memory is wrong. If more than one person has mentioned this to you, perhaps you could ask one of them to be more specific about how and when this happened, or to gently remind you of a promise etc. the following day.

I find it scary too, but it is worth remembering that stress can cause this, as can worries - it is not necessarily a sign of senile dementia and I believe it is not even one of the more common signs of it.

30 years ago, aged 30, we moved 300 miles to the other end of the country with 2 children aged 5 & 2, we had no family anywhere near & I’d only met a few mothers at the school gate to say hello to. One morning one offered me a lift to the city, 35 miles away, for shopping. Lovely. We separated in the centre, agreed a meeting point & time, & off I went with my 2 year old in her buggy & a long list. A while later I came out of Marks & Spencer and absolutely froze in terror. BHS was in the wrong place and I had NO idea why, or where I was. I remember vividly the terror of trying desperately to remember how I’d got there and nothing would come to mind. I had no idea where to go to pick up my 5 year old and what to do. I sat on a bench & made myself breathe deeply while my daughter looked at me trustingly. It was truly frightening for a good 20 minutes, and I’ve never forgotten it. BHS stores always filled me with anxiety forever afterwards! To this day when we go to shopping centres I tell myself constantly ‘You are in such & such a place, the car is parked xxxx’ , over & over again. I can see now how stressed, lonely and distracted I was at the time, and these factors must affect our rational brains. But not permanently, just keep breathing!

I once managed to put a paying in envelope into a cash machine. So embarrassing to have to fetch the bank clerk to retrieve it and also very worrying. Nothing similar has happened since.

It's happened to me too-was supposed to be going to a meeting at a place I've been to many times before, couldn't remember where the junction was off the motorway at all. In the end. I went back the way I came , in tears, sat in the car for a while, then did the journey again & found my way.I also get the "I've told you that, you said you would do that" lectures too

I am not sure it is all to do with age to be honest - I have had a couple of 'moments' but my worst was sitting in my car in a tiny car park on the side of a quiet country lane, waiting for another car to go by because I simply could not remember which side of the road to drive on......

Never happened before or since, thank heavens!

My husband is all of a sudden going through this. He leaves the car door open when he gets out, bumps into things, walks extremely slowly, gets confused very easily. The doctor says stress but to my mind it is more. He is 78 and has always been active. He is supposed to go for a memory test in a couple of weeks. Anyone else had this problem?

It has happened tome due to stress. It’s like my rain just goes on holiday for a while!

This post makes me feel so much better, I had a similar thing happen to me a couple days go, I went to put my pin into my smartphone and I just couldn't remember the pin , it's something I normally do several times a day , I put it down to our brains being overloaded with PIN numbers, pass codes, all the household stuff that we do online as well as remembering hospital appointments, dentist, picking up grandchildren etc, Our parents didn't have to cope with technology like we have to , That's my theory anyway !!

I was typing a text last week and couldn't for the life of me remember how to spell of. It freaked me out. I also apparently make plans to meet up with my daughter's but have no recollection sometimes. I laugh it off but it does worry me

I strongly suspect that everyone here had had similar ‘memory losses’ for years and as children or young people simply not thought about them .... if not, we would all get 100% in every exam, all pass our driving tests first time, never need to be shown something several times, and never ever have accidents, etc.

Don’t be too hard on yourself!

??

Not so long ago, my elders group (inc. me) attended a fact-finding meeting run by Clinical Psychologists at Auckland University who are doing a major study on dementia.

Some of us had temporary, 'Why did I come in here?' type memory lapses. Others (inc.me) had longer, deeper and more worrying breaks - as if part of a jig-saw goes missing, albeit temporarily.

It's not just forgetfulness, but as if whole chunk of our known experience goes walkabout, just as Craftycat describes. About 3/4 of our elders' group had these lapses and yet not one of us has dementia.

Nine years ago I went to a place I regularly visit, had a lovely picnic and read a book. Then preparing to return, I had absolutely no idea how to get home.
I sat in my car doing extremely deep breathing and trying not to panic, while wondering if I'd have to live at the beach carpark for the rest of my life.

It was at least 30 minutes before the jig-saw piece dropped back into place.

Explaining this to the university, we all wanted to know if this sort of thing was an early sign of dementia and they seemed to think it was not. Jus synapses getting older and worn out like the rest of us and not firing as efficiently.

I've had a couple of lapses since, very short when, in a place I know well, it suddenly looks totally unfamiliar. This lasts about 10 seconds and then it all snaps back.

We all accept that our bodies don't always work at peak efficiency as they used to in younger days, so I suppose we have to apply the same logic to our brains.

Lancslass1
12 x 37 - 444. not 666

I agree that a lot of our actions are on autopilot and so if we actually stop and think about them we forget how to do them.
I repeatedly call my oldest DGS by the name of my oldest DS (his uncle). I guess that Oldest DS and oldest DGS are stored in very similar places in my brain and they sometimes

'get mixed up'. I'm sure that's what I wrote!

A couple of weeks ago we were in Belgium visiting WW1 War Cemeteries. In Zonnebeke (forgive me if I've spelled this wrongly) a large mansion has, underneath, a myriad of underground tunnels leading out into trenches. We walked through the really very interesting museum area, coming out at the top of some very steep wooden steps which led down to the cellars and tunnels. I couldn't go down as I'm claustrophobic (and also have a dodgy knee). DH went down saying he'd be back up shortly. He didn't come back. I waited about 10 minutes then doubled back, trying to find where we came in. This was awkward as it was one-way and very busy. On reaching reception I explained my difficulty to the lady on reception. She called on a volunteer to show me the way in from outside the building 'that way you will find your husband', she said. Volunteer duly walked me through a beautiful garden into a lift, which went down into the tunnels and left me. There was no-one there, except me. I couldn't hear anyone and the only lighting was flickering bulbs. My sense of direction has always been bad, and I could feel myself starting to panic. Anyway, I just kept trying not to veer off left or right and gradually found myself at the bottom of the steps that I wasn't able to descend. Suddenly, a horde of children came dashing down (school trip) and I think they did get a bit of a fright when they came across me - a wild-eyed, white-haired witchy looking woman cowering in a corner as they dashed past. Believe me, I flew up those steps (knackered knee and all) and outside into the beautiful day. I was terrified. DH eventually turned up, by the way.

I have never possessed a sense of direction and so forgetting where I am or where I am going is normal. I thank God for Google maps!

As for communication with DH, it is just as grandtante described it with each of us saying it was the other who either said or forgot something.
We have agreed to try texting important things to each other so that we have a written reminder of what was agreed.

I often have a problem when in shopping malls, I leave a shop but have no awareness of the direction I should be walking in. DH now says "turn right" or "turn left". I never shop on my own because he would have to send out a search party.

It can be frightening but I think a number of things could be the cause.
Mental overload. Tiredness.Hormones .
If it really is bothering you badly
check it out with dr.

I am not sure we can take reassurance from this thread about it being normal. Think of all the people on gransnet that didn't post! 20% of all of us are going to have dementia in our lifetime and if 20% of gransnet members have posted in this thread, then that means we're in the 20% and these really are early warning signs. Sorry - I am the glass half empty type