Suddenly realised I was getting old!

Like others, I’m finding this thread reassuring. My mum had dementia and was very frightened a lot of the time until she became so poorly she didn’t care, IYKWIM. I am constantly panicking because I dread developing it. Going through the menopause, I couldn’t think of words, could describe the thing but not remember it’s name etc. Now I’m 70, it’s back but along with all the sort of senior moments that you’ve all described. I like the thought that, if you know you’ve done it, it’s not dementia!

Been having the senior moments for some time - the going upstairs example - but these completely blank moments, where you have been doing something quite happily, then the next move just doesn't happen, panic does set in - yes I find that quite scary.

I too think that we all have so much to think about and remember, and it is in an odd way comforting to read of so many of us that have the same experience - and no, we surely cannot all have dementia. I get a bit panicky when I think of something that I want to do, look up on the PC, or say, and within less than a minute I have forgotten it and stand racking my brains trying to decide what it was.
I forget appointments - without a diary my life would be a shambles - but from different things I have read, if you are aware of the forgetfulness, lapses of concentration and sudden inability to do things that are long established routine, it is purely that - forgetfulness which does just come with age and from having brains so full of information. Many years ago I asked my small Grandson if he knew a particular fact; he sat silently and I asked him again, thinking he hadn't heard. He said indignantly 'Nanny, please! I have eight years to think back!' Well, that's us, isn't it? We have many, many years to think back and much stored away in the myriad cells of our brains. Take heart ladies - we are sharing another concern and it's no small wonder that we have a 'senior moment' and I am convinced this is all they are.

Happened to me as well and this was a few years ago, when I was only late 50s ....was driving to a friend's house (go there every week) reached her street and suddenly didn't know where I was. Couldn't recognise the street. Mind went totally blank. And then, after after a minute or, I snapped back. Awful feeling..

All this is very common as you get older, but we hear so much about dementia and such like, that we immediately think we are in the first stages of going dolally. It is supposed to help knowing that you are not alone, but personally speaking, it makes no difference to me. We just have to do the best we can to keep mentally healthy for as long as we can.

I remember going to the doctors with my husband. I sat in the car while he went in by himself. He came out and said the doctor wanted to see me, So I went in and the doctor said "Unfortunately he has forgotten what he wanted to see me about." I told the doctor. I think that was the beginning of my husband's Alzheimers.
As for myself - so many senior moments! Just forget them!

Craftycat
Welcome aboard.
What then is the answer for remembering where I put my reminder?Like the note 'to remind myself' that the guy who helps out with my garden will be abroad on holiday for the next two weeks then wondering why he hasn't turned up and not responding to my phone calls either. It wasn't on the fridge door where I stick my reminders . I eventually found it by chance, what was it doing there? in the pocket of an old jacket hanging up in my downstairs toilet and being a jacket I never wear .

My brain, since menopause, works on a strictly need to know basis!
I returned to work after 7 weeks sick leave and couldn't remember my log in for my computer just to start off!
You come to the stage where you walk in a room to fetch something and can't remember what it is!
Lisalou, I have experienced the forgotten conversation too. I think that we are all so busy these days that some things just get shoved to the back of your mind , especially if your brain has decided it's not important! Things you do on a regular basis then stop, when you go back to doing it again, you have a struggle to remember .
I know that when I was at junior school, I was pretty good at mental arithmetic but after several years (and useless modern maths) I really struggled to add up and subtract in my head

I'm in my early fifties and have been having a lot of scary moments like those you mention - my better half laughs it off and says things like 'everyone gets a bit forgetful' and 'don't worry about it', but I do, as like you I find it frightening. The example I can think of now is standing in the kitchen, staring at the thing on the cooker, knowing it made coffee but didn't know what it was called; the word 'kettle' just would not come - I stood there for a good few minutes, cried, came back to sit on the sofa feeling like this was the start of losing my marbles completely. He says he has to remind me of 'chats' we've had that I have no recollection of and when having a bit of a clear out recently I had boxes of photos that I have no idea who the people in the photos are - 100s of them, and not a clue who any of them are or where I knew them from etc - now feeling that I might as well throw them out if I can't remember anything about the people or places - sad. I guess some of us get 'forgetfulness' and 'missing marbles' before others.

Lisalou, based on my own experience I feel you should not worry about it in any way. I am seventy-five and thankfully still fully fit with no chronic ailments, but like yourself often forget why I have entered a room, what tool i wanted when i opened my tool box or what it was my wife asked me to get while passing the shops.

My wife and i did plan to retire in 2013, but due to a serious road traffic accident to one of the persons who bought the Business from us meaning that he will never work again in all probability, we bought back into the business in 2015, and we are still there.

In that office working environment I very often sit down at a work station and then cannot remember what it was i am supposed to be doing there. Staff often ask if have followed through on something they have requested of me, and i say "oh I have not had time yet' when it is, in reality, i have often forgotten.

My wife who works on accounts and administration in the business often has similar experiences, but the busy life of the office means we do not have time to dwell on the matter, and that i feel is the way to deal with the problem.

If you just keep busy with your mind engaged then these lapses of memory etc will not concern you as thoughts rapidly turn to other matters in hand. All middle-aged and senior persons find themselves having lapses on memory, but it is very often just part of the ageing process and nothing more than that.

So Lisalou, stop worrying, keep mentally busy, and i am sure all the world will be well with you.

Hope this helps.

The brain is the most marvellous part of our body. When you think of all the memories stored over many years there no wonder we get lapses at times. I can remember things that occurred when I was three even the names of our neighbours at that time but now it is names that I have difficulty in recalling. I used to know the Latin names of most plants but now it is sometimes the next day before I recall them. Was fluent in French and Spanish but now have difficulty in recalling words in those languages. Etc.
Doesn’t mean the onset of dementia.

You have all managed to post comments on this blog site.
The comments all make sense.
I doubt very much if anyone with dementia can do that.
I am practicing one or two things in case I am ever tested
1) In 30secs ,how many animals can you name.?
2) Starting at 100 can you count back in sevens.
3) One I really like which nobody will ever ask me to do ...
Do you remember how we used to chant our times tables.?
Well I chant the 37 times table to myself.
The lovely thing about it is that
3X37=111
6X37= 222
9X37==333
12X37=666 so a third is easy.
Sad I know but it keeps me happy.
.

My mother had dementia for the last 10 years of her life so when I forget words or names I get nervous. I had to have a Power or Attorney some months ago and the GP had to certify I was in my right mind as someone has to do this. He did a test, so I am reassured. They are quite happy to do this if someone is worried and it's a simple test. A few questions and bit of conversation. It doesn't take long.

Then there are things you can do to give yourself the best chance of not getting dementia, of slowing down the onset. Healthy eating. The usual things, vegetables, fruit, wholemeal bread, etc. Not a lot of alcohol. And physical exercise is unfortunately good for the brain. And I hate exercise! Mental exercise is good too. Crosswords, sudoko, learn a new language or skill. Take up knitting . Begin a class. Investigate the local ones for OAPs. Tai chi or chair-based exercise are good.

Yesterday I boarded a bus and tapped my pass several times wondering why it didn't work. Driver pointed out it was my M&S debit card. At a glance, similar colouring at the edges and I'd put it in the wrong space in my purse.

Mine was I wanted to turn the tap off in the bathroom but couldn't remember how to do it. What a stupid thing, I actually had to call my husband and ask him. He told me to leave off the gin in morning but it really scared me. Never happened again.

It could also be a temporary illness, or lack of nutrition. Ensure your diet is good, add supplements if needed. My mum was not quite herself, forgetful etc, turns out she had pneumonia. My dad was similar, he had a lung condition and the lack of oxygen had this effect.

I think we assume its an age thing but I am a teacher and I ask young people to complete a task at home and they have no memory of me asking them LOL. I was talking to a 30 year old yesterday who said he got in his car and froze because he forgot how to drive it, he was told by his doctor it is stress and because use we are living in a world of automation so we our brains become lazy. I don’t know if there any truth in it but its less scary that the age explanation.

I recently read that we take on / have more access to information in 24 hours than people did in a lifetime in 1900. For me that is amazing but scary also.

Don’t forget ladies, excuse the pun. if any of you are menopausal this is one of the symptoms. ( I believe there are roughly 39 symptoms)
Confusion, loss of concentration and forgetfulness
That’s what I’m putting my brain lapses down to

All middle-aged and senior persons find themselves having lapses on memory
Grandad; It's not a subject to boast about, but I'm glad to say you'll have to include me out of that broad claim. In fact, my memory has sharpened considerably; don't ask, but a downside is that I also re-live bad things as if I am still there. It's definitely not due to clean living , but genes play a big part and there's not much you can do about that, in IMO.

My girls say to me on a regular basis “ mum, I told last week”. “Mum, I’ve already told you that “. It used to really annoy me but my memory has been rubbish my whole life so I try not to worry about it. Yet, I can remember small events but am unable to recall major events. My daughters say most of the time it’s because I don’t listen that I don’t remember anything they say

This is such a reassuring thread, just to know that these phases are completely normal. I've had a couple of these episodes in the last few months - getting to a roundabout and not knowing where I was or which exit to take being the worst. It's genuinely so scarey and upsetting. For other forgetful moments I usually excuse myself by telling people that my brain is a finely tuned, top of the range computer - but unfortunately the hard drive is now full! If only someone would invent a memory stick to plug into my ear! ?

I shall shortly be having chemotherapy for metastases on my spine and hips from the breast cancer I had 23 years ago. A very dear kind friend has offered to come to stay for a few days to cook meals for the freezer as DH isnt great in the cooking department and so we wont need to live on supermarket lasagne and pizzas. I was sitting writing out a list of food we need from Lidl and came to the moussaka and I just could not think of the vegetable for it. In the end I googled vegetables for moussaka and up came aubergine plus lots of recipes for vegetable moussaka. If I mention forgetting words to my daughters they say it happens to them all the time too. So maybe it's because everyone is so busy these days.

The most worrying thing I have done happpened a couple of weeks ago. I needed to draw out some cash from a local cash machine and,when it refused to give me any. realised I had put in my loyalty card from a well known coffee chain-almost the same colour as my bank card. Oh dear! Laughed about it afterwards, but it did scare me..

MiL was in a 'squeezed middle' situation years ago, and was combining caring with working with ... everything else. One day she went to get changed to go out and when DH asked her where she was going, she had no idea who he was and no memories of anything else. Stress and overload, unfortunately it lasted all afternoon and was truly frightening for both of them. 20 years later, she's got all her faculties and her memory powers put us all to shame. Hope it helps, it is frightening but it's probably just a symptom of overload.