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Overheard!

(29 Posts)
Jane10 Wed 10-Apr-19 10:20:02

I travel a lot on buses and generally enjoy eavesdropping. Can't avoid it really especially with people shouting into their phones. However, last Friday on my way to yoga I overheard the following:
Small girl 1: " If you have a baby and you're not married you get sent to jail."
Small girl 2: " But Miss X (teacher?) has a baby and she's not married."
Small girl 1: " They don't know about her ...yet."
Chilling. So young! Wonder who's giving them that message?
They looked to be about 8/9 .

Greenfinch Wed 10-Apr-19 10:45:04

grin

Caledonai14 Wed 10-Apr-19 10:55:38

Being from a generation that was fibbed to on a regular basis about that sort of thing, I remember being told you couldn't have a baby until you got married (as in it wasn't physically possible). Once God saw that you were married, you would have babies.
When I asked how God would know, the reply was that of course he would know because everyone got married in church.
Needless to say, they came clean about it all once I'd had the playground talk!

Mycatisahacker Wed 10-Apr-19 13:59:50

How funny op or how sad jury’s out grin

My lovely mil got pregnant at 17 literally because her mother had told her babies only came to married women!! Could she not see the problem!! My mil also thought if you did it while early pregnant you had twins! grin

EllanVannin Wed 10-Apr-19 15:04:18

You can't help hearing conversations at times especially with some of the loudmouths on their mobiles.

Caledonai14 Wed 10-Apr-19 15:17:44

Mycatisahacker I'm so glad it wasn't just me who believed that one about the married women. There must have been so many girls for whom that belief had disasterous consequences in the 50s and 60s.

Yes Jane10 as the auntie of a teacher who is unmarried and has a child, I'd be worried if her pupils thought she could be carted off to prison for it. It actually sounds like some sort of cultural confusion. Maybe there are indeed countries where unmarried mothers face jail or sanctions? Could they have got it from the internet?

Jane10 Wed 10-Apr-19 15:57:34

I have no idea Caledinia14. They seemed like nice innocent little girls prattling away to each other. I was just thinking how sweet they were until I heard what the first one said.
I'm back on that bus again tomorrow. Can't wait!

Jane10 Wed 10-Apr-19 15:58:03

Sorry I mistyped your name!

janeainsworth Wed 10-Apr-19 16:03:41

I remember being told when I was about 8 that 'if a boy was rude to you, you'd have a baby anddisgrace your family'.

I had no idea what this girl meant and avoided boys for yearsgrin

Jane10 Wed 10-Apr-19 16:04:53

Probably for the best janeainsworth!

janeainsworth Wed 10-Apr-19 18:46:39

I went to a co-ed school jane10 and there was no fraternising in a friendly way with the boys, only hanky-panky of varying kinds behind the bike sheds by the more daring amongst us, to which clique I didn't belonggrin

M0nica Wed 10-Apr-19 21:14:45

I thought it was the putting on of the wedding ring in the wedding ceremony that did it.

Mind you, I worked that out. All I was told was that people didn't have babies until they got married.

Mind you someone in the playground told me you had to do 'it' every night for nine months before the baby was born. That bit of knowledge I immediately discounted as a wartime babyI knew my parents had had very little time together for the first five years of my life but still managed to have 2 children.

paddyann Wed 10-Apr-19 23:32:30

not babies but "bits" my youngest GD was telling her cousin that she decided she didn't want a dog because they sniff your penis ....no amount of explaining that girls dont have penises made any difference to her she insists she does because a boy in her class told her everyone has one ,you just cant SEE girls' ones .

Caledonai14 Thu 11-Apr-19 07:53:18

Paddyann my friend's very wee girl threw a tantrum when she discovered her brother had a penis and she didn't. "But Mummy, why can't I have a willie too?" she snochered.

She got over it, of course. grin

NfkDumpling Thu 11-Apr-19 08:02:57

My beloved grandmother took me down the garden to see the rabbits when I was about eight years old. They were at it like - rabbits. She told me exactly what was what long before my friends knew. They thought babies came out of your belly button. They didn’t believe me.

BlueBelle Thu 11-Apr-19 08:09:12

I wasnt told the babies and marriage but I remember people saying you couldn’t get pregnant if you did it standing up ?
My mum, bless her heart, gave me a little booklet about the facts of life when I was about 11 but I was very disappointed to find everything beyond starting periods had been firmly sellotaped down and being a good girl I didn’t go beyond trying to unsuccessfully peep

BlueSapphire Thu 11-Apr-19 08:21:15

I was a complete innocent until well into my teens. I thought you just had to sleep in the same bed as your husband to get pregnant and it happened without any physical contact! I was astonished when I eventually worked it out. Mother never told me anything and the 'sex' talks we had at school meant nothing to me. My DGDs (11 and 8), seem to know it all, as their mum is very open with them.

DoraMarr Thu 11-Apr-19 09:47:21

I love eavesdropping on buses, too. Recently two smartly dressed mature women with cut-glass accents were having a conversation. One was almost in tears describing the various faults of her adult children, and wondering where she had gone wrong in bringing them up. Her friend said “It’s not your fault, your children are quite capable of being d**ks all by them selves.”

Anja Thu 11-Apr-19 10:00:14

Overhead from back of car after picking three grandchildren up after school.

‘Do you know that old people wear nappies?’

‘The Queen is very old, does she wear one?’

‘I bet she has gold ones.’

Jane10 Thu 11-Apr-19 11:46:22

Wow gold nappies!
Long ago there was a very nasty case in all the news. A bad man was doing bad things to young boys. I didn't think my children had been watching the news. However, on the way to Beavers one night with a carload of small boys I was asked, "Mum whats b.." he struggled to find the right word. My heart sank as I envisaged a difficult conversation. He continued, having found the right word, " What's a balaclava?"
Well phew!

Namsnanny Thu 11-Apr-19 14:16:15

The first time I heard what ‘actually happened’ when you ‘slept ‘ with someone, I remember saying,yuk! How disgusting! Why wiukld anyone do that!!!’ Junior school playground talk. I felt embarrassed for every pregnant woman I saw after that...how could they show themselves to the world when everyone knew what they had done!!! Ha

Grandma70s Thu 11-Apr-19 14:57:21

My mother had books called The Marriage Book and The Motherhood Book. They were quite large. I used to sneak them upstairs and hide them in the roof of my dolls’ house for secret reading. I didn’t really understand them, but they were exciting. If my mother were still alive now, I would ask her if she knew I’d done that.

Littleannie Thu 11-Apr-19 16:49:35

My mother never told me anything about sex, I had to learn about it in the playground. When I was 16 she gave me a book called Married Love. One sentence sticks in my mind. "On your wedding night, put a towel underneath you to soak up the blood".

callgirl1 Thu 11-Apr-19 18:24:43

When I was about 11 I was reading my mother`s "Woman`s Weekly", I looked up and asked her what a womb was...…………..and she clouted me!

janeainsworth Fri 12-Apr-19 00:12:45

I like that Dora grin
I remember Mum asking me one day what we were doing in Science, I was in the first form.
I took a deep breath and said ‘Human reproduction.’
There was a long silence and that was the last time the subject was mentionedgrin
The teacher was a middle aged bachelor called Fred Finch.
He was at pains to point out that ‘doing it’ must be a pleasant thing to do, or people wouldn’t do it at all, if all they got out of it was having babies!!