The things they say - DHs that is!

Well, my dh is no longer around but I remember vividly being shaken awake ( literally) at three in the morning and being told “ That is why it’s called Tolworth, because there was once a tollhouse there.”

He then lay back down and continued with whatever that interesting dream was.......

My husband jumped up from sleep one night and asked me if he had peeled enough carrots!

This reminds me of one of the Mma Ramotswe books where her husband is talking about car engines or carburettors in his sleep!

My DH woke me up in the early hours one morning and told me very seriously he was worried as he wasn't wearing his suit in bed !
He then, of course, went straight back into his dream and I was was left wide awake wondering what the heck just happened . . .

My husband laughs in his sleep, not sure what is tickling his fancy ( not me)

Are you awake? Well, I am now!

"Sarah did it"
I don't know a Sarah and as far as I know neither does DH

Not in his sleep, and I have posted this before, but I wanted the ground to open up (or pretend that I had never seen him before in my life) when MR P asked the nice young lady at the garden centre if she had trailing labia

Hahaha Phoenix! How embarrassing. Did you tell him what he'd said later or leave him in blissful ignorance?

Some years ago, in the middle of the night, Grampy leapt out of bed , and ran naked to the top of the stairs shouting ‘ oh my god I’ve thrown Sarah down the stairs ‘!

Sarah was our 10 year old daughter !

He hadn’t by the way !

Years ago DH poked me awake and said 'Sit UP!' which I did then he said 'Take a letter to what's his name@ and promptly fell sound asleep again. As I have no shorthand and DH has never had a secretary, I have no idea where this came from.

One night, DH was lowering himself back into bed after a convenience break. As his backside hit the bed I screamed at him "DON'T SIT ON THE CAT'S HEAD!!" He leapt across the room in shock and has never forgotten it, poor thing.

The weirdest thing my H ever did while still asleep was a few days after our D was born.
I had fed her and changed her Terry towelling nappy and had just left it at the side of the bed, I was so tired, and H never woke when I was tending her.He suddenly woke up, dragged the wet nappy, and the dressing table stool onto the landing and sat crouched staring intently down the stairs. When I asked him what he was doing , he said I am just waiting for the last wicket to fall and then I will come back to bed, which shortly after he did.

Oh so many I could tell, so many broken nights (for me) that is. He has attacked the bedside lamp because he dreamt he was being mugged by Kosovan immigrants at Canon St Station! This happens regularly, just the muggers change nationality. He got up and started shaving in the bathroom at 3am, on a Sunday! He was convinced he had just turned the alarm clock off. He got up and started dressing because he needed to go and buy milk! He has started kicking wildly cos he was playing football at Wembley! I could go on...........

I must point out he is a lovely happy family man who will help anybody in trouble regardless of race colour or creed and is loved by all who know him. I know I am very lucky so the nightmares are quite an amusing minor problem.

My DH wakes up and tells me how tired he is because he has been building a wall all night or digging the veggie patch. The activity changes but he is always exhausted by it!

The other night as I was struggling back from the bathroom DH turned to me and shouted "sing harri", he was obviously dreaming, nobody but nobody asks me to sing.

My DH woke me up to the bedroom being covered with sheets from the ottoman including the bed to protect the grass as there was 12 foot spikes.
When I asked what he was doing he got back in bed and fell asleep. Me had to fold all the sheets back up. When I mentioned it to him the next day he just laughed.

Phoenix, thank you for that. I will be giggling whenever I think about it today - am taking minutes in a meeting later so am hoping I won't need to tell them what I am giggling about!

Once my now-ex DH kicked me in bed in his sleep and said 'sorry Jill'. Well that is not my name, but was that of a work colleague who used to flirt with him! I never let him live it down!

Pheonix, that is so funny . We moved house a few years ago and OH was chatting to the new neighbours. He told me they were lovely and the old chaps name was Wally. I happily shouted Hello Wally for a few weeks before our unfortunate neighbour quietly told me his name was Morris! I'm still unsure if OH did it on purpose

My DH many years ago woke me up to tell me the cat had caught a rabbit, he had taken the live rabbit downstairs followed by the cat, he got to the front door, opened the door & put the rabbit on the step outside, rabbit ran off followed by the cat, he then looked down & realised he was naked. Luckily it was 5.30 on a Saturday morning & hopefully our large conifer would have shielded him from view. He never lived it down

My DH often yells in his sleep but I can't understand any of it until he calls "Help! Call the police!". This happens quite frequently, always the same words!

Doesn't happen often but sometimes DH will call pre-flight checks in his sleep. That's not so bad as it's said at normal volume.

But I have jumped out of bed a couple of times when he shouted out and went through a whole engine fire drill.

Strange thing is I don't remember him doing this when he was working. The minds really is amazing.

I wondered what I say in my sleep, I asked him and so far I've just mumbled, thank goodness :-)