Need a kick up the bum!

Over 3 years ago I joined up with a few local GNs for coffee once a month and we are still meeting. Maybe start something like that in your area and meet others?

Because in some way, that’s maybe hard to admit even to yourself, life is not how you want it to be.

Something missing? Something there that you dont want? A vision unfulfilled?

Nothing will change till something changes.

(I looked for a nice emoji to put there but I can’t find one)

I totally understand how you feel Oldwoman as I have been through the same thing.
Don't beat yourself up because others appear worse off than you. That doesn't help at all. Tell yourself, constantly, that "This too will pass" and maybe go and have a word with the doctor. Also Charleygirl's advice to get together with other people is a good idea. Before my husband retired and I was home alone he could always tell if I had had company or not by my mood.
Sending you all my best wishes for the future (and remember Gransnet is always here for you) xx

Depression is so much worse if there is no obvious reason for it. Try and get out and about a bit as charleygirl says. Maybe try to get in touch with people you have lost touch with.I feel for you and wish you well.

Dear Oldwoman. I understand how you feel, there are times when it seems impossible to go on. I listen to mindfulness videos on YouTube. One in particular is by Mark Williams Mindfulness Body Scan. It helps bring me back to the moment. I like DanniRae’s advice “this too will pass”. A big hug to you and ? be kind to yourself xxx

So sorry to hear you are feeling depressed ?
Depression (which this sounds like you have) is not usually helped by looking at how “lucky” you are. It can sometimes hit even if things are apparently well in your life.
If it’s mild low mood then try going out in the fresh air (if you can) gentle exercise (if you can) a small treat maybe? But if it carries on is persistent and depression then you would be advised to see your GP

How long have you felt like that?
Are you having trouble sleeping? Sleeping too much/not enough/waking up?
If you've been like it for a fortnight or longer, you may well have depression. See your GP. Nobody will judge you or think you're being silly. I have been like that for years, on and off. I take antidepressants but sometimes have an off day. You CAN and WILL feel better.

Exercise, change of diet, listening to music, etc., all help - but when a person is clinically depressed, they lack any motivation to do anything at all. See your doctor and get some help. Best wishes. x

Sorry to hear this - it is a real pain.

You need to make a judgement as to whether this is just something that can be helped by getting out more etc., or whether it feels different to that - and see the GP.

I am able to distinguish between when I am just feeling down and when the blooming depression has come knocking on my door again. But I have had a bit of practice - certainly more than I would choose!

I am sorry you are feeling so low Oldwoman.

Isn't it strange how we can have so much going for us yet feel down and without any spark? I have been there too, many times. Lots of us have.

Sometimes we just have to go with it and the feeling passes, and as others have suggested going outside, playing music or doing something you have to think about can take you out of your mood. Counting blessings can be counter-productive because then we despise ourselves more for 'indulging' in depressed moods. We don't need a guilt-trip as well!

If you cannot shake off feeling you want to cry for no good reason, do go and see your GP. Sending you hugs through the ether.

I agree with Day6 If your low mood does not pass then seek some professional help,. Depression has nothing to do with how fortunate etc we are. It's an illness like any other.
Hope you feel better soon Oldwoman

Oldwoman you are not the only one to feel like this.I have days when I am so sorry for myself that I take to my bed and do nothing!! Why?? I have so much to be grateful for;,good health,family,friends,dog,horse and no money problems.

All my life I have had days like this and the only consolation I have is that I know it will pass and as I live alone I now just accept it and hibernate until it passes.As others have said a trip to the doctor may be needed.

comparing yourself to others less fortunate isnt always helpful. It heightens the guilt and sense of isolation.

If youre fed up, you can be! Similarly if you are depressed you can be.
If you are unsure go to the GP.

No you don’t need a kick up the bum Oldwoman70. If you are feeling sorry for yourself it doesn’t mean you don’t care about other people, you too are a person who needs recognition for your thoughts feelings & life’s experiences,be as nice to yourself as you would to a friend, be your own best friend, but also try to have a two way chat with someone you trust. ( if you are able to volunteer in some way with helping others or charities etc it can also help you’re own feelings) best wishes

PS ,Actually sometimes being on these sites can make you feel a bit low, if you get negative feed back or are misunderstood it can make us at times feel quite vulnerable and displeased with ourselves. Big verbal hug from me ?

oldwoamn70 here is a hug from me - sometimes how we feel is illogical but no less painful for that.

Perhaps you do need to see your GP Oldwoman70 and explain how you feel.

If, however, it's just a general feeling of being 'down' and not having anything to look forward to, then the answer could be your pc, the telephone and a pen and paper. If you have friends nearby that you may have not seen lately, then phone them and suggest coffee or lunch. Find out what is going on in your area, eg WI, TWG, U3A - join and try them out.
If you have an aim, a list of things you want to achieve and try to go out then you could find you feel so much better.
I did feel like that when my BF died and it took a while but I have made myself join U3A etc - not everything may suit but there is always another group to try.

I hope you can find a positive way forward.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Oldwoman70, I saw elsewhere that lack of vitamin B could bring about a low feeling. Your GP can check that, I think.

I find St John's Wort useful but it can conflict with prescribed meds, so if you have any of those you'd need to ask your GP about that.

I hope all the advice here doesn't seem too confusing, and that you find something that will help you.

Thanks to everyone who responded - I really appreciate it. Living alone sometimes things get on top of me and it is comforting to know that GNs are there for support. I know things have to change in my life and only I can do that. Planning to take a walk in the sunshine today so hopefully that will help lift my mood. Thank you all again.

Enjoy your walk Oldwoman, we GNetters will be with you in spirit???

Swollen eyes. Have you thought about parking on the other side of the road?

Enjoy your walk, hope it helps. I don't know whether you use Facebook and the like, but I think they give a false impression of what everyone else's life is like. They all have low times too, but don't post about them. I agree that a GP visit might be called for.

Swolleneyes, sorry you are having a tough time with neighbours. Your post might get overlooked on this thread. Perhaps you could start a new discussion so that more people will reply and advise. If you are new to this go to 'Forums', choose an appropriate subject heading, and click on 'start new discussion'. I apologise if I am teaching a grandmother to suck eggs! . Here's hoping you find a solution.

OP There are some very thoughtful replies on here. I’ve nothing to add save that many of us recognise what you are feeling.
All good wishes ?