Your advice taken

Good morning Annie. Just remember little steps, we are all with you. x

Well done, Annie.
Your plan sounds very sensible and most likely better than the 'professional' help you would have got.

(The appointment & waiting arrangements you were offered sound absolutely horrendous for anyone.)

Wishing you slow and gradual success.

Try to keep taking little steps Annie, Gransnetters are here for you ???? sending love and hugs.

Finally been able to respond to this thread. I've been completely stymied by problems with mobile version. I'm now on my desktop.
What I wanted to say (although Anniebach sounds like she's on the way to sorting things herself) was the other side of the story. ie the Psychiatrist's perspective. I suspect that there are 2 different teams: one being 'General Adult Psychiatry' and the other being 'Older adults Psychiatry'. You're not quite the right age to fit yet!
Although AB's story is undoubtedly tragic and painful, sadly life being what it is, many if not most of the psychiatrist's caseload will also be in emotional pain or at the very least suffering mental ill health too. By offering a special appointment to accommodate Ab's issues he is most likely going to have to reduce appointment times for other patients or, worse, cancel some. Psychiatrist's caseloads are groaning. Several of my acquaintances who are very good psychiatrists are now suffering mentally themselves due to just plain overwork and having to work day and daily with stressed and mentally unwell people. They have massive responsibility. If some unfortunate person's level of mental illness is not assessed and judged correctly the buck stops with them if there is one of these hellish incidents where a person suffering from delusions stabs a passer by or even staff member. Its rare but, as I said, the consultants bear the ultimate responsibility. Living with responsibility for each person on a large caseload is very hard indeed but they do it.
That's it. I just wanted to offer another perspective on the situation.
Ab my question 'what are you afraid of' was in relation to your mention of 'the locked ward'. I was concerned that people may have the wrong impression of such secure wards which are usually locked for the security of the inpatients and are not generally places for visitors to be afraid of.

Cancel some to see one ? Not so.

As for what I was afraid of, I explained in full. As in all fields of medicine there are good and not so good.

I am quite aware of x x ward, have visited patients there, have ex neighbours and friends there .

You Jane have put forward the psychiatrist ‘s side I have put forward the patients side.

This is the same psychiatrist who lied at my daughters inquest and when I lodged a complaint to the health board my daughters files had been mislaid! I couldn’t afford to continue fighting the hospital for the truth.

"Cancel some to see one ? Not so." - you can't know that.

It sounds like you and this psychiatrist have an unfortunate past. Not the best person to see you and I'm very surprised that he offered to accommodate you at all. In a larger Health Board area I doubt he'd be allowed to under the circumstances you describe.

And all doctors ask permission from the health board before they see a patient ? I am not surprised he offered! To see me , he offered! to see me in a place any one would know was impossible for me. Our past was more than unfortunate by the way.

If someone who is not mentally robust, at the moment, says that a particular thing is too much for them, it is very unfair for someone else to tell them it should be fine.

Um, at the risk of seeming stupid (as I’m quite used to appearing so), the psychiatrist offered to see you at the hospital where he would be on that day anyway, and expected you, agrophobic to the extent of not being able to get out of your front door, to go, on your own, over the bridge which holds such terror, to a hospital with locked doors? How?

So what should happen? If every distressed patient was seen in the location of their choice the NHS would break down.
Ab if as you say legal proceedings were mentioned then the health board legal dept and the Doctors Defence insurance would have been alerted and that doctor would have been strongly advised not to see you. It's a much bigger picture than you might think. Ramifications and implications galore!
Meanwhile, kind GNers seem to have set you on the way to recovery...

Most strange he telephoned me himself, if as you claim they have an immense work load Jane, it certaintly threw me .

It was not true to suggest I wanted a location of my own choice, if I had a choice it would have been in my home as would any agoraphobic or a telephone consultation which I did suggest , all I needed was to be referred to a CPN to give support to leave the house .

You couldn't be referred on to a CPN without being seen. There are rules and a system to work through however irritating you find it. That referral would then be reviewed and prioritised (or not) by the community team and you'd be contacted by them in due course. Like it or not that doctor was trying to be helpful! His offer could have speeded up help getting to you.

Nfk, I explained my fear of the bridge, I explained my fear of locked doors, I don’t lock my doors even at night, i asked if I could have a telephone consultation which is quite usual here with the surgery. He offers an appointment over the bridge to a ward which is locked, I know every room in that hospital , there are several consulting rooms which are used once a month , very close to to the two wards for the elderly . I accept patients have to fit in with doctors and consultants, but he asked too much of me, I think he knew this when he telephoned, little wonder the suicide rate has risen since he took charge . I expect the patients in Gosport thought that medical team were to be trusted too and the health board

Perhaps things have changed. It’s a while since I retired, but in Norfolk an agrophobic would be seen at home. How else? They can’t get out.

Really Anniebach? The psychiatrist us causing an increase in suicides and health boards can't be trusted?!
Why does anyone bother to try to help!

Jane10 you go to far! I have read about Annies horrendous times, have you? I dont think it is my place to tell you about this, but it is my place to defend a lady who has had a terrible tragedy in her life and was let down by the system and is still being let down. The majority of GNs are very supportive of her and if as you imply you work in the field of mental health shame on you.

Sorry Jane10 very harsh. We are trying to support ab not make her feel worse, where is your compassion.

Jane, I did not say he is causing anyone to take their lives, this is a decision a person takes themselves, and I did not say all health boards cannot be trusted . You have defended all within the NHS I have said not all are angels without wings . I did not want sympathy from that doctor , I asked for help explained why and as I said earlier he said leaving your house, crossing the bridge coming to a ward which is locked will be an excellent start to your recovery.

If I could do those things I wouldn’t have asked for help to overcome my fear of them.

He may have excellent qualifications but certaintly not basic common sense. Sorry you are angry at criticism of one doctor , did you defend Shipman with such vigour and blame his patients? Not all doctors are angel of mercy, fact,

I've been well aware of Anniebach for years now. I'm fully acquainted with her situation. I was trying to provide the other side of the picture. Adult mental health services are very well known to be the cinderella of the NHS and the struggle of their stretched service to meet the demands of thousands of stressed and mentally unwell patients must be known to all but clearly are not well understood as to exactly how that impacts on real patient care and support.
Slagging off individuals and services helps no one except possibly the individual venting. It would be more useful to put this energy into lobbying for more funding for mental health services.

I am not affected by Jane’s opinion posters. She has given her views .

I guess Annie has come onto this forum and shared and asked for help.People have come forward with suggestions.

Sadly MH problems are still regarded as something to be ignored and/or feared.

I often think of diabetes for example. There is no shame in taking medication or feeling unwell. I assume there is a reasonably robust system in place to help people.

If only we could move forward with our thinking about problems in our heads.

For someone in your situation, Annie, venting was perfectly in order. You have come up with your own strategy, in the absence of help, and I hope you make progress with it.

Jane was very thoughtless in the tone she used and seemed to give no thought to how it might be received, however I'm glad you were not upset by her posts.

If Jane works or has worked in mental health she is aware of the underfunding and stress, possibly suffered from it or has colleagues who have. But I think the public speaking out too is important, we all agree how wonderful the NHS is but not everyone working in it is wonderful . I was shaken today when gosport was being discussed and it was said some files were missing, the police were informed of the deaths but did nothing, one big cover up. I too had to accept ‘files were missing’ the police were with my daughter at one in the morning but not allowed to know why , just ‘it was unrelated to her death’, it scratched wounds not yet even scarred,

But onward ,

my next step, if the volenteer gardeners come tomorrow I will ask them to bring my daughters rock rose nearer to the house but not to close, and if it isn’t raining i am going to sit out there and chat to them and take their tea out not call them to ‘come and get it ‘ ?

I did mean come and get the tea , nothing more

Way to go, annie!!