Having a baby very young.

I was in full time education until I was 24 (first and second degrees), married at 28, first child at 31 and second at 34. This seemed normal to me, as it was much the same as my mother. I was born, the second child, when my mother was 34.

I was 68 when I became a grandmother. One son has no children, the younger one was mid-30s when he married. My DIL was 34 and 38 when she had the grandchildren. So you see it is a familiar pattern.

Most of my friends were much the same, but I had one friend from school who married at 22 (I thought she was crazy) and was knee-deep in nappies when I was still a student. I loved babies, but I felt sorry for her and I think she was envious of me. She is now a great-grandmother, whereas my grandchildren are still at primary school. I am unlikely to see them grow up, I suppose, though my parents were long-lived and did see my children grow up. It doesn’t bother me particularly. They are just gorgeous now, enough for me.

Mine was a shotgun wedding, it was all lust and not much love, when I was 21. My first born just before I was 22 and my second when I was 24. I became a gran in my fifties and loved it. Now they are grown up and I am a great gran at 70. I am really glad that I was a young mum and gran and had the energy for them all. The marriage didn’t last but I have been true.y blessed with a second husband who I might add was a friend first and a marriage that has lasted 27 years.

I became a mother at 30 and a grandmother at 60.

My elder sister had her babies at 17, 19, 21 and 27, and became a grandmother at 45. She was a young-hearted, glamorous granny, and she can look forward to being a great-grandmother as most of her grandchildren are grown up. I do envy her that.

I had my first child at 26, and my fourth at 39. I became a Grandma when I was 59, then 62. My youngest daughter had her first child last year, when she was 43 and I was 77. I hope to survive long enough to become a great-Grandma, but hope that the GC wait until they meet the right person.

My 'best friend' married at 20 and had my godson at 21. I on the other hand married at 34 and had my first at 35. My daughter did the same as me and I became a granny at 71. It keeps me 'young', haha!!!

With hindsight I wish I had had my children much younger. I was 28, 29 and 34 when my three came along.

Having come through the system of the 60s and 70s, it took me a long time to realise who I was and what I wanted to do. Doing secretarial work just to bide your time till you married and had children seemed the normal thing to do at the time.

It wasn't till I was about 34-35 that I realised that I could have had a career and actually found the confidence to do it. If I had had my children at 18, I would have been able to start work again at 34 with a clear conscience, as they would have been independent enough by then, but at that crucial time, I was at home, feeding children, changing nappies, running a household.

These days, girls are far more worldly wise and career-ready when they leave school, so stopping for a few years in their late 20s to have children is a minor hiatus in an already established career, and having children around then is fine.

Still, I'm glad I've got them and have put up with my career-free life, now nearing retirement ready for spending more time with the DGS.

I was still 16 when I got pregnant as was my then boyfriend. We weren't forced to get married but it seemed the right thing to do at the time - we'd known each other since we were 11 and got engaged at 15. As an only child like you Elothen I had no experience of babies at all so have no idea how I coped. Both sets of parents were very good but we were very much left on our own - husband still on apprentice pay, we lived in a grotty flat until his parents gave us the deposit for our first two up two down house when the baby was 2 months old for which we were eternally grateful.

Did we feel we missed out? I don't believe we did - back then there wasn't much to do socially wise - clubbing seemed to come along a few years later so we were heavily embroiled in nappies and feeds with our second son by then (20 when he was born). We always said we grew up with our kids. Maybe the one regret we both have is that we didn't have the time to make our own friends which we may have done had we waited until we'd both been working for some time, The other thing it meant was that with them both leaving home very young (17 and 16) we have been on our own now for many years missing not only them but all the friends they brought to our lives.

We became grandparents at 44 by which time we were mature enough to know how it worked but young enough to enjoy her and her younger sister when she arrived. We had to wait another 16 years for our youngest son to finally give us grandchildren. He has done it completely the opposite way round to us and his brother waiting until he was 39 before having their children. Life throws curveballs at us all the time

I had my first two at 22 & 24 and my third at 45. Only two years between my younger son and oldest DGS. All the children get on well, we have shared babysitting and had some great family holidays. I know if anything happened to us my older DC would look after their brother and he has a great relationship with them .

I had my first at 21 and occasionally felt I was missing out. An old schoolfriend came to stay and I was breastfeeding my baby son while she was putting on mascara. I felt wistful for a time but I'd never have exchanged our lives.
He didn't start young so I had to wait until I was 60 to become a gran.
I'm still fit and still have my lively in-laws to keep me feeling young.

I have no regrets. What's the point?

So true MeAnge, I had my first at 18, second 18 months later, third, 20 years later, he is 10 and his neice and nephew (my 5 and 6 year old grandchildren) all go to the same school. They play together, we do day trips together and untold activities, its brilliant. I struggled the first time but it held me in good stead, finding free stuff to do, volunteer work, I grew with my first two children, and this time I have a different outlook on life, and a different type of confidence. I dont feel like I've missed anything, and with being a older parent this time round,(Im 50 now), when experts give me their opinions on how to feed/teach/bring up my child..I just say to them, I manage to get my other children to 'home leaving' age without killing them, I'm sure I'll manage it again..lol

Legs and Ajelna the school leaving age was raised to 16 on
1st September 1972. Had cause to look this up after a somewhat heated debate with a friend this week. I was working in education at the time and remember all the
Complaints from school children who saw an extra year of school as a waste of time.

I was 21 when DD1 arrived, we had little money and there was lots of making do, however, we were happy and have been young when DGC arrived. As basketlady says the downside is the DGC are now fast growing up and the eldest ones out in the world we miss all the involvement with them although we are lucky enough to see 4 of them regularly.

ajanela School leaving age was 15 until 1970. I was at School then & did an extra year to retake GCEs, left in 1972.

I had DD when I was 25, enjoyed my teens & early 20s. I was left "holding the baby" when DH left, DD was only 4. I went back to College for 3 years then joined Civil Service & met DH, moved 250 mile from my DM when DD was 8.

DD had DGS1 at 29 & last year had DGS2 at 37. My DM was GG at 81 & loves showing off photos of her GGSs.

Do I regret anything - no, I now live quite near to DD & see my family a few times a month.

I was 21 when I had my daughter, and I think it was too young - for me. Some people are very mature in their teens but I was an only child, had little experience of children and had never held a baby. I was absolutely out of my depth when my daughter was born. I had no idea how exhausting it was and how little time I would have to myself. Though, with difficulty, I coped well with cooking, cleaning, etc., I was an impatient and not very loving mum.

Seven years later, when my son was born, it was a very different story.

Isn't it awful the way young women were described as "damaged goods", "shop soiled", etc. etc., while the men just got away with it?

I had my eldest daughter when I was nineteen - forced into marrying her father who was then eighteen.My biggest problem (I realized later) was that I lost the opportunity to find out who I was , and what was my place in the world. I loved my children but it was never enough for me to be at home with them.Also, it is never a good idea to marry someone you don't really know. My one consolation is when I see how much they have all achieved.If abortion had been readily available in 1966, my life would have been very different,not necessarily better, but the world would be a very much poorer place. The other downside to having children young is that my dgc's are all grown up and busy with their lives so we don't see so much of them.

I was 20 when I had my DD, and had to wait 6 years for DS. I absolutely loved the whole parent thing and so did DH. DD was 6 and at school when DS came along so it was like having two only children. Luckily DD took to her brother straight away so there was not much jealousy.
The lady who lived next door to my Mum had a baby the same time as me. She was 41 and I thought her very old.

Very true MeAnge.
I was 29 when I had my first son (so an 'elderly mother') and 36 when my third child was born. I'm glad I didn't have children in my teens or early twenties, I don't think I was mature enough then to be a good parent. I became a grandparent at 56 and our grandchildren range from 2 to 10 years and another one on the way. I sometimes feel a little sad that our youngest GC will only remember us as quite elderly grandparents but I hope we will be around long enough to see them grow up. My own grandparents were in their 70s when I was born and some of my happiest memories are of times spent with them.

I was 21 when I had my eldest (of four) and 42 when I had our youngest, so I've done motherhood at both ends of the age range. It's been funny for my youngest though, as she has had friends whose parents were younger than her own brother!

I have been married 45 years, we've moved around quite a bit, including two stints abroad, and I have no regrets, I've loved watching our dc growing up, (the youngest still has some years to do at uni) and now the grandchildren, the first being born when I was 55.

I love the saying “..there may not be a right age to have a baby...but it’s always the right baby “ ?

I was 16 when I had my lovely DD and 18 when I had the other DD. I was married at 17 for 16 good years. We had a nice comfortable life and I fitted into motherhood and being a wife very easily I’m an only child and had loving supportive parents which helped. My girls loved having a young mum. They did however have my GC in there 30’s as they went travelling etc,so I have 3 GDs of 13,7,8. I’m now 61 but I’m told look 51 I have bags of energy I’m the one taken on roller coasters and goes on trampolines and rides that big wave in Australia when I visit them on my own once a year. So I’m fortunate that I have my health and energy to do this as I’m still having fun now in my older years as I was busy being a mum and wife in my younger ones.My only thing I feel I missed out on was travelling but since coming to Australia to visit younger DD and family I’ve been getting to explore other parts of the world so feel it makes up for it. I really wouldn’t change a thing.

In the 60's when working on maternity, anyone in their late 20's having a first baby was classed as an elderly primip. Late teens and early twenties physically was classed as the best time to have a baby.

Unfortunately many single mothers and their children had to suffer greatly due to prejudice.

The school leaving age was raised to 16 in the early 60's and
now with education going on longer and good FP people have babies later but often with difficulty. It is very important women have access to education with reasonable priced Childcare so they can reach their full potential and have children at a time when they can conceive easily. Having children when it is the best time for your body should be part of a career plan with a balance between career and family so nobody misses out.

The financial institutions have taken control of our lives and raising a family seems to be a secondary consideration.

I'm with you, Gillybob.
Just look at our beautiful children and grandchildren, and realise that whatever we didn't do, we did achieve something amazing. (And yes, I and my family are as flawed as everyone else's with massive ups and downs)

I was 20 when I had my first daughter another daughter 4yrs later and a son when I was 27 and we lived with my in laws in a shared house that was hard as my first husband was still tied to his parents but I got through it.
Both daughters had children early and I was a Nanny by 38 which was lovely, I’ve seen most of my GC into adulthood and we now have 9 GC and 3 Grt GC so hopefully as I’m 70 this year I will see more Grt Grands born in my future yrs . We go on holiday with a mixture of them all every year and make lovely memories for them all.

Dudnt we ?

Didn’t we !

I had my first baby at 16. My mother refused to help me and the baby was adopted. My mother spent the next few years insiting I marry someone anyone as I was 'shop soiled'. I married someone at 19 didn't love him and had my second daughter at 21- she and her son are the joy of my life. I divorced at 25 and married lovely DH - we are still married nearly 40 years later - Mother hated him until she was terminally ill and he did a lot of the caring when she was bedridden. We had several miscarriages. My first daughter 'found me' when I was 50 and we get on very well. she has 3 lovely grown u children and her first grandchild on the way. Do I wish I had done it better. You bet!