Abortion Time Limit

Am I the only one worried about the emotional and physical effects of abortion on the women concerned?

No we are all worried about the women who have abortions, but changing the law will not make things easier and better for them. Having a child is as great if not a greater emotional and physical trauma. Only then the traumatised woman has to care for a baby as well.

Not at all, Nonnie, I don't wish to give that impression.

I have been asked on a number of occasions by friends to accompany them as their support for the procedure. It is genuinely, regardless of the circumstances, always a harrowing trip. There was one particular incident, when the friend and I were both not quite fifteen, that I will not ever forget.

I didn't do this lightly, but I always asked myself: if this was me, what would I want from a friend? Someone to be there and support so I wasn't alone. So I have gone, and dried the tears, and given the hugs, and sat and held hands in the bathroom afterwards. And it is not a thing anyone does lightly. But I never wanted anyone I knew to have to do it alone.

The modern medical and surgical methods are extremely safe for the woman, and have been shown to not affect future fertility. That doesn't mean they mean nothing to those who have them, merely that the physical danger is no longer potentially fatal in the way the backstreet methods were. (many of which didn't work, either)

My friends were scared, and sad, and in a terrible state. But I knew that I would be taking them home safe and with the full expectation they would physically recover completely. I cannot imagine how I would have felt taking a friend to one of the old backstreet practitioners, knowing she might easily die. I want to say I would still have had the courage to go; I don't think I would have done.

I had an unplanned pregnancy as very young woman as a result of rape. My then boyfriend was savagely violent and abusive. I was still in university. I thought long and hard about my choices. I knew anyone I confided in would expect me to terminate, especially my parents.

I decided I would continue the pregnancy. At that time, I believed in a lot of shit about the father having the right to know, no matter if he was abusive ya ya.

So I told him. The resulting beating and shove down the stairs left me with a slight lifelong limp, a bum knee, two ribs that have never quite healed, and the miscarriage that he had intended to induce.

My child would be a teenager now. That child is not here because someone else took my choice about my pregnancy away from me. I will never stop being angry that my choice was taken. I will never support efforts to take other women's choice away from them.

I have had three (including current) very medically difficult pregnancies since. Doctors have seriously talked with me about the possible need to end them for my own health. I have chosen to continue. Is that a bad choice for my own health, short and long term? Undoubtedly, especially this time. But it is my choice to make. It's my body. I don't regret those choices. I only regret the time someone else chose for me.

Oh gummybears we never know what other people go through. You are a survivor and obviously a good friend. I send you hugs but that doesn't seem enough. I am awed by how you have survived and still remain compassionate and understanding.

gummybears I don’t even know what to say, but I just needed you to know that I am thinking of you.

nonnie I hope I didn’t give the impression that I am not concerned about the wellbeing of the mother. I of course am, and firmly believe that there needs to be counselling offered at the time, and available to the mother throughout her life. However I agree with trisher, forcing a women to go through with these pregnancies is not the answer and will only create its own problems.

gummybears, you are a brave woman. I wish you well.

Gummy bears ?

Early one morning some years ago I happened to see a minibus which delivered women who'd been to a clinic specialising in abortion back to the city centre. One was young, pale, and looked tired. She was greeted by a well dressed older woman, most likely her mother, with the sharp query 'Have you got rid of it then?'
I could have wept for her.

Nonnie I think all of us who have known someone who has had a termiantion can tell you stories of the guilt and regret felt even when there has also been relief .A friend of mine has carried the guilt with her for 30 years ,she knows she did the right thing.Having the baby would have tied her to a vile abusive man for life .That doesn't stop her crying on the annivesary or on what would have been the birthday .Its not an easy choice but sometimes its a necessity .

gummy bears, thanks for your post. It's a brave woman who shares her history as you have and Respect and love to you.

As for the question about the physical and mental health of women who have terminations. The research evidence is positive. Yes, some women remain distressed by their experience but many get on with their lives, with a sense of relief that a termination was a possibility at the time they needed it.

The underlying narrative is frequently that women must inevitably be traumatised and psychologically damaged as a result of having an abortion and that they suffer from lifelong feelings of guilt and regret. If ending a pregnancy is constantly referred to in these terms, I think a self-fulfilling prophecy is in danger of being created.

Shame, guilt and regret is, perhaps understandably, more likely to arise in women who felt that they were pressured, perhaps by a controlling partner or parent, into having a termination against their true wishes, and if societal views appear to see these feelings as natural, it reinforces these emotionally damaging thoughts. I don't think anyone who believes in a woman's right to choose would condone coercion being used to either push women into continuing witha pregnancy or into aborting it.

I think many women are grateful that they were able to end a pregnancy which, for any number of reasons, they felt ill equipped to cope with or which, given their current situation, would make their lives infinitely more difficult.

Emotive subject ...but I think as babies are now becoming 'viable' at 24 weeks, with medical intervention, the restriction on time limits does need to be looked at. I don't think the OP is wrong there at all.

Just ask nurses who have to legally allow babies to die, just because they are aborted at 24 weeks but are still breathing and could be given treatment to allow them to live

Also parents who's babies are born at 24 weeks and pray their babies will survive the next 24/36 hours. Medical staff do all they can and many DO make it.

I am not procrasting for or against abortion. It is a HUGE decision for any person to make but I would certainly vote to reduce the time limit. If somebody doesn't WANT a baby, even a baby with complications, there is always other routes to consider.

Some people on this thread seem to be suggesting that there is a huge epidemic of late abortions in this country. This is simply not true only a tiny number are carried out after week 19.

In the UK2016
98.3% of abortions were carried out between week 3 and 19
1.6% were carried out between week 20 and 23
0.1% were carried in week 24 and beyond

I believe that a compassionate society women should not be forced to give birth to babies with major abnormalities that they lack the capacity to care for, nor should women be forced to risk their own lives if a major medical complication occurs that could even result in death.

Who can forget the poor woman in Ireland who was forced to die of sepsis because medical staff were terrified to be blamed for any procedure that might be termed an abortion
www.theguardian.com/world/2012/nov/14/ireland-woman-dies-after-abortion-refusal

Bluegal I think we established that the majority of terminations take place before 12 weeks and only in extreme cases are they allowed at 24 weeks .Would you like to volunteer to tell someone they MUST carry a baby for another 6 weeks or more if that baby was likely to die as soon as it was born or to be in a state incompatible with life? That is surely the cruelest thing any human can do to another.

As far as I know, nurses can decline to work during abortions if they feel it is morally wrong.

Its a big no from me too.
Every case is not the same and should be treated so. You can,t put all your eggs in the same basket. Have you seen a termination ( I think not). It may be due to the mothers health in a life death situation. You se every case is different. Like I said its a big no from me!!

I don't judge any woman who has an abortion for whatever reason - I've never been in that position - "There but for the grace of God go I".
As other posters have said, the number of late abortions is very very small - and goodness knows what the circumstances must be for those women.
As for reducing the time limit to 10 weeks - that would mean going back to the butchery of the back street abortionists - I certainly wouldn't sign any petition.

I think your focus is wrong. Shutting the stable door after the horse has bolted. Please focus on reducing the numbers of unwanted pregnancies by promoting responsible relationships with safe sex and contraception.

You have absolutely no right to do this.

As early as possible as late as needed.

As far as I’m concerned, there is no logical link between when a foetus might be viable and the upper limit on abortions. Babies born well before 24 weeks are not left to die- where on earth did you get that idea from? Complete rubbish. Nurse and doctors are allowed to opt out from abortion procedures. What appals me is that GPs can opt out from prescribing contraception or referring for an abortion.

That was to Blugal

Definitely won’t be signing any petition to reduce the time limit on abortions but will be campaigning to repeal the 8th over here in Ireland, later this year.
It pees me off how many men (especially Priests) think they have a right to an opinion regarding women’s reproductive systems. They can feck right off.

Craicon please let us know how your campaign is going. I think it is obvious from most posts on this thread that GNers have a depth of understanding and compassion about abortion and the necessity of providing legal and safe access for women.

I am in my fifties & had an abortion when I was 17.
I was young, naive & terrified. The medical profession treated me like some sort of "loose woman".
My mother made it quite clear that if I continued with the pregnancy I could not stay at home & I had nowhere to go. She was adamant that I would be seen as "damaged goods" .
I have since gone on to have a family but still shudder when I read about the pro lifers & their intransigent views & think of that frightened 17 year old.

Well done to you Goodbyetoallthat (I like your name) in telling your story.

Your sad situation is one that I'm sure most people would empathise with, and rightly so in my opinion.

But I don't see why it is sometimes felt that a woman has to justify her decision to have an abortion. If she feels she honestly does not wish to continue a pregnancy, provided her decision is hers alone and not the result of coercion, I think that should be reason enough.

I think it's very sad, and wrong, that some women terminate pregnancies, not because they don't want the baby but because they do not have the financial means or family and social support needed. But I do recall that when teenage pregnancies were more common there was a lot of tut tutting about the housing and financial support given to young mothers.

Its a strange thing, abortion.
It seems that the process must differ depending on the perceived 'morality' of the reason why its performed.
The mechanics of the operation are the same, whether the pregnancy is as a result of somebody being totally irresponsible, or having other reasons.