We are the company we keep. Or are we?

My friends are largely like me from age and background. However, one of the two friends I see most of is a different age group and nationality/English as a second language. The differences don't stop us being on the same wavelength for lots of things, the only issue is that I'm retired and she's working so harder to meet up.

I have friends from all walks of life. I suppose we are bound by common experiences along the way, or by work, families, other friends etc. I value them all. <thinks> I don't think I could put them all together in the same room - I am not sure they'd mingle well or like each other. And some I have to meet alone. I can think of one who irritates another of my friends, yet she doesn't irritate me. "Takes all sorts," as the saying goes.

Very close friends are similar to me, but have friends from all walks of life with very different backgrounds & views.

All very different really, different jobs, education everything.My best friend is Hindu, other friends are Irish, Scottish, Welsh, South African as well as English.
Different religions, different politics etc but we have a marvellous time with all of them.

When my ex SiL met one of my closest friends for the first time he said he would not have put her and I as friends. I never have understood why he thought that.
She and my other close friend are very similar to me in many ways.

The friend I have known the longest used to have some ideas and beliefs that I found completely repugnant, but I decided that as she had no other close friends at the time I would stick with it and I'm glad I did. It took many years of exposure to others' views about certain things, and a change in newspaper reading habits, before her own opinions shifted, but she no longer holds the views she did then. We just don't discuss Brexit!

Interesting question. Upon thinking about it, most of my friends are like me really. They are mainly local these days, and as we all live in Park Homes none of us are very well off.
But I still have one old friend from where I used to live and she is, and always has been, much better off than me.
I have very close friends in Germany whom I have visited many times. Their standard of living is higher than mine, but Germans don't seem to have the same views about class or money and are extremely friendly and welcoming.
Likewise my Australian friends who have a very casual and warmhearted approach to life.

I have old school friends, friends from my teens and work friends all “collected” over the years, new and old. Most are fairly similar, but it’s also nice to have a couple of diverse characters to shake things up !!

Yes mine were from the same background as me, just lost a old neighbour and good friend only 73 and other friends husband has died, she is not coping well won’t see anyone apart from family.
My work friends are retired now like me, so busy doing there retirement things. We keep in touch.

I have very different friends. Some are very definitely incompatible with each other, and yet I get on with them individually very well. I think it's good for you to be exposed to different personalities and views.

My friends seem to be like yours Grannyact, from all walks of life, countries, ages and beliefs. One of my friends is from school days and her life and Beliefs are so differ t from mine but we remain the best of friends. I also think it keeps you young.

Does it matter where our friends and acquaintances hail from. Just be glad that you have friends, can give and take help and enjoy friendships throughout your lifetime without having to analyse whether they are of the same ‘type’ as you.

Non of my friends are like me, the one that was( a long-standing friendship) as gone. We became too different in retirement, no problem for me but for her with granny duties and a miserable husband, envy crept in. New hobbies as brought a new circle and never in a million years would people looking in say we would be friends BUT likeminded people sharing a passion as given me confidence, and a wonderful retirement(forgot to mention the new man too)lol

This is interesting. I find that some friends (who I rarely see now because of distance) are from working together or being neighbours. Others I have met and we immediately “strike a chord” with each other irrespective of background or experiences and a friendship develops. My family say they are “sympatica”! I guess
It helps if you have some common ground. I am lunching today with a new friend - I suppose our common ground is that she is a single Mum as I was many years ago and have both been through divorce. But do we discuss those painful memories - no!

I’m with you Day6. When I introduced two of my dear friends of long standing to one another, that was an awkward lunch! I assumed (wrongly) that because I loved them both they would at least like each other! When I told another friend how uncomfortable the lunch had been, she wondered if there was an element of ‘jealousy’ involved as in, ‘she’s more my friend than yours’ which I thought sounded too petty but maybe she had a point?

So, grannyactivist I assume your friend voted leave and read the Daily Mail and you introduced her to the Guardian! ?. But then again ....

I have friends much older than me, some younger and others around my age. The strange thing ( to me) is that, of those around my age, most do not have children so we don’t have that in common.

I think it more likely that friends will be similar if you have always lived in the same place you went to school. We have moved around the country quite a lot so our friends are mostly very different to each other would probably not find a lot in common. DH's relatives are also very different from mine.

Our lives have been enriched by the many different levels of education, backgrounds, nationalities, religions we count as friends.

Good comment Eskay10 totally agree.

Our friends (mine and DH's) are of very differing social, national, language and religious backgrounds, but all manage to get on if they meet here.

Our unspoken rule has always been that differing points of view have to be aired with respect for the opposite view when two or more viewpoints are being aired.

That said, anyone not prepared to respect others would be asked to leave or at least to shut up. Not easy, but I have had to do so, once or twice.

A cousin of DH's was asked to go, when he tried to force his own views on religion down others' throats and was extremely rude in the process. I showed a neo-Nazi the door, when I discovered his politics and I would have done so, even if my Jewish colleague hadn't been in the house at the time.

No-one with racist or extreme right wing political views is welcome here, but these are the only lines we draw.

You can never know too many people, I have friends of all ages. I do miss the ones who have died off terribly and new ones are not 'replacements' but life goes on.

My dad would not make friends with old people, he said they were 'wrinklies' he was 86 and sometimes lonely but resisted opportunities to be more social.

My friends are mostly of a similar age but, thinking about it, they fall in to two groups. One group I have known since we were at school together and they have all done different things and gone down different paths so that ostensibly we have little in common now. That doesn't stop us having a good old chinwag when we meet up and we have even had brilliant weekends away together. The other group are people I have met more recently through shared interests and they are more like the person I am now.

I think your MIL missed the clues, your friends do reflect who you are, an open minded person, with diverse interests, who is happy to explore outside your comfort zone

What a good question and one which I have thought about as I’ve got older. Now on the wrong side of 75 I find most of my friends are retired from paid employment and like me are very involved in their grandchildren’s lives and short of time to meet up. They are all sorts, different ethnicities, some very ‘churchy’, some atheistic like me but all much of an age. I live in a very mixed community and have always had friends from very different backgrounds and many of them young enough to be my daughters. I think if I had put them together in the same room they would have got on famously.

Only problem about living where I do is that people move on, young ones start families and often move to where they can afford to buy a home, older ones sell up and move to the coast (what is it about Bournemouth?) and so on and I miss them.

A large number of my friends are about 10-20 years younger than I, conservative with a small 'c' (although they probably vote that way too) predictable and definitely not the sort to have friends of 'many cultures'.
I am the odd one out being the only divorced female in the group and the outspoken, unpredictable non-conformist, in many ways.
I get on best with my children's friends as they have a fresher outlook on life.
Many people my age have health issues or have staid lives which become routine and that is something that I don't want to consider.
That said, all friends are valuable and I try to morph into whatever group I'm with at the time.