Another one of my "incidents" ;....

Ha, ha, ha! Bad case of 'soggy bottom' Phoenix!

Great story phoenix and brilliant riposte Alima I have never tried Thongs , wee DGD reported that her bottom was eating her pants when Mum put too small garments her by mistake , I imagine thongs would be the same

Phoenix One wouldn't expect anything else from Next trousers would they ?

That was your only option methinks.

Dear Writer, another fine mess! .

Perhaps we should have a thread entitled ' The day I went commando."

My no-knickers event was far less exciting than yours and, thankfully did not involve much discomfort or contortions on my part.

When I was very young (ah yes, Shirley Hughes and her wonderful 'My Naughty Little Sister' stories come to mind) my mother decided that I should have a studio portrait photograph taken. Looking back, the decision seems pretty remarkable to me because money was tight in our family and this was an unnecessary and unusual luxury.

No doubt, my mother wanted to capture something of my early innocence and what she cherished as my 'little-giryl splendour' before I began primary school. I had arrived after four brothers and, fortunately for her, had put an end to my father's aspirations for a family football team! Notably, none of said brothers had ever had a studio photograph taken - this was a rare moment of preferential treatment for me!

I do remember some fragments of the preparations for this illustrious occasion. I had worn curly rags to bed the night before, my long gold locks were brushed and fussed over until my scalp felt as if it were on fire that following morning, I was dressed in my finest: a cute corduroy dress, complete with embroidered motif of a little teddy, beating a drum and no doubt my mother would have walked out with some pride that sunny autumnal morning.

Boisterous, noisy, bothersome brothers were duly discarded dropped off at the school gate and we made our way to the very upmarket, guilt-fronted, double-barrelled-named high street photographers where my apparent beauty was to be captured for posterity.

Now, my mother had an awful lot to do every morning. Five of us had arrived within a five and half year period. Father was always out to work early and she had to get us up, washed, breakfasted and dressed single-handed every school day. She was a very good mother - we were always clean and tidy and taught all our manners well.

But on this particular day, something must have gone awry at the planning / dressing stage. We must have been two steps away from the sophisticated jingle of the doorbell and the hushed tones and plushed velvet seating of the photographer's waiting room when my mother suddenly - and without warning, seemed to recollect something. She ground to a halt, tugging me to her side, lifted my skirt in full public view and exclaimed - in loud tones that I can still feel resonating today - "No knickers! I forgot your knickers!"

We had to make a hasty and rather panicked retreat to the nearby "Wool shop," which thankfully stocked little girl 'necessities', so as to reclaim my modesty before our more demure entrance for the photo-shoot!

Needless to say, when I look upon that 'sweet' portrait photo now, some fifty years later, and often before I take in the cherubic grin, the tumbling curls, the cutesy dress and my 'elegant' pose, with bare legs tucked up to the side of me, my eyes are invariably drawn to the slightly hitched up hemline and I fall to wondering again if 'something' would have shown that should not show had it not been for that quick trip to buy another pair of 'unmentionables!

Wonderful. Another day in the life of phoenix. As someone else said, you really should write a book or blog.

I can't be sure phoenix but I think it was you who "decorated her bush" at Christmas. That was a great thread too.

phoenix imperfect

Alas Crafting I don't think that one was me, unless of course I've forgotten?

Phoenix
My 'commando' story:
Aged just five years I was once marched home in the middle of the day by my teacher who was seething with anger, but careful to tell me repeatedly that she wasn't cross with me. My father (who mostly terrified me at that age) was absolutely roasted on the doorstep for sending me to school without knickers - AGAIN!! His response was so meek that I was in awe of the power my lovely teacher had over this scary man and I never forgot the incident. (My mum had left us and my dad obviously left a lot to be desired as a carer for four children under seven, but I never went knickerless again.)

Oh ga, bless you!

grannyactivist what a story! Your teacher sounded like a truly formidable woman! I am left wondering if your dad got any help with bringing you up? It must have been hard all round! My dear mum was often ill and away in hospital and I know my dad found it a struggle to look after me and my 4 brothers. But he stayed and got on with it.

I wear M and S knickers with no VLP and they work a treat.

As a matter of interest, why did you feel excessive make-up was required for this business meeting?

Not personally but we were having coffee in a little cafe when the waitress arrived to serve the people at the next table. As she bent over I realised her black leggings were not opaque and that she was 'going commando". My husband turned his head at that moment and his face was a picture as she was right next to him at shoulder height. We debated whether to take her aside, or perhaps have a word with her manager but as it was the end of the day and presumably she had been commando all day or merely following a fashion craze, baring in mind the visible thong above the trousers thing, we opted to do nothing. Still not sure it was the right decision..... I might reconsider if it happens again........

I remember my mum saying as a wee girl she was at someone's house for tea and didn't like the jam sandwiches, so she stuck them up her knicker leg. Then she sat down for all night. The row she must have got at bed time when she took off the squishy knickers!

phoenix's post brought back two memories.

The first was a very cold winter when my daughter was just three. We decided to take the baby in the pram with her big sister walking, in the snow, for a half hour trip to a parade of shops. She was a good walker and dressed in warm dress, hat, gloves, and a long warm coat and scarf she was warm and happy.. When we were queuing inside the first shop she announced that she needed a wee and further announced, pulling up her coat and woolly dress so we could be in no doubt, "Silly Mummy, you forgot my knickers". With snow falling outside I felt like the worst mummy ever.

My other memory is more recent but only just triggered by the post.

When I broke my leg at the knee and was rushed to hospital they cut my trousers off me and through the haze of morphine I recall my relief that I had knickers on and not a thong or none at all. The accident happened at home and I might well have had no knickers on as I have a condition which causes overheating with accompanying problems. I still take the risk at home but no longer ever when I am going out.?

Well Nellie - would have been just one less thing to cut off, but poor you!

I used to wear navy blue knickers for school with a pocket in them. (No doubt a nicer option than shoving your handkerchief up your knicker leg). But I was a Daddy's girl and wanted to be just like him. Unfortunately he had the habit of walking along with his hand in his pocket!!

A thong, seriously. Sorry funny story but I have little sympathy. No problem with the commando style. DO NOT WEAR A THONG. They are not good for you. You would do better to invest in normal knickers with trousers with better coverage.

Imperfect - no my dad had no appreciable help, but then he would have refused it anyway. He wasn't a nice man at all.

I have a slightly different pants story, but sort of relevant. When my son was 18 his sister bought him a huge pair of white Y fronts as a joke. Not long after he left home and had to fend for himself. When he visited, my daughter spotted some white material peeping over his jeans. When she asked he admitted he'd run out of clean pants and was wearing the huge underpants. Lets hope he didn't have a date that night.

I'm glad to say that nothing like that has happened to me! My story about going commando involves my DD.
For quite some time after she was toilet trained, and introduced to knickers, she had the habit of taking them off when she went to the toilet. One morning, not long after she had started school, I had dropped her off and taken her little brother to nursery school. Arriving home I did my housework, and went upstairs to put the laundry away. There, lying on the bathroom floor were DD's knickers. I couldn't go back to school until home time so the poor child had to do without them all day.
When I collected little brother from nursery, and DD from school, I asked her if she was missing anything. She looked about her and said "no mummy".
Needless to say, I always checked that she was wearing her knickers until she was old enough to remember for herself.

Defo option 2.... great stories made me giggle. Happened to me 15 years ago on a first date, thong ended up in the bin as there was a large queue and I couldn't stand there drying them in front of people.I had a dress on so was very cautious for the remainder of the evening. We ended up being together for 15 years so he got to hear the story, we giggled about it.