Argy-Bargy Cafe - enter at your peril ?

I can't remember?

Well, there's a very distinctive odour around you! Did you take a short cut through the recycling plant by any chance? Or have you been schmoozing with Big Jim's brother, Fat Willy? He pongs!

I told you, I can't remember a thing. I have lost two days out of my life.
I was thinking, we could patent my concoction and market it as an amnesia causing drug to dodgy foreign powers.
However, unfortunately, I can't remember what I put in it.

Well, whatever was in it has made your hair turn green.

I think that was caused by the chlorine in the pool at the naturists mixed swimming relay race. Fat Willy and Big Jim were both taking part.

Oh that's an odd image

I've heard Fat Willy is a 'pool piddler' so don't go in yerself and deffo do not swallow any water.

Dear me standards are slipping here. It was such a sophisticated joint. Anyway I've been working while you lot have been blotto. The rugby team were in the other night and drank the place dry. Even Dirty Nelly complained about their singing. I've been at the wholesalers restocking and of course had to do a bit of sampling to make sure it was fit for your discerning tastes. Somehow several days have gone missing but there is plenty behind the bar to keep your levels up. Just keep that Big Jim and his sidekick away as I'm finding it hard to carry back the crates of booze on my bike at my age.

Thanks Liase you are a star! Did you remember the pasties and the pork pies as well?Go down a treat with some mushy peas.
Where's the ice bucket...me feet are complaining?

Did the water turn their batons green Marydoll?

I'm not sure what you are driving at , Meno

Pasties,pies and peas ready to serve. The delivery man wouldn't come through the door for some reason. Just dumped the stuff and rushed off. Get your pinnies on, stop fighting, and start serving. No using your feet as an excuse to sit around. I'm going to see the bank manager. I may be sometime. A few samples might soften him up a bit.

How did it go at the bank? Will we get a loan??
This bar must not go under.....we must all stand/sit/slump together! Time for a quick one? ( I was talking to BIG Jim there.)

Failing that, I will have a drink.?

I'll join you. By the way do those green crotchless knickers on the bar belong to MARYDOLL? She seems to be turning colour lately.

Oh those are her very old ones.....not crotchless just holes in them, we use it to wipe down the beer dribbles on the bar top ( or Gaston's dribbles.)

It's ok, didn't you see my post yesterday about my knickers bargain In M&S? I got three pairs of sexy pretty knickers for £1 each. I'm planning on wearing them all three at once tonight. I have a plan

I have a plan to drink the place dry tonight as worn out cleaning the place, anyone joining me?

Too late, I have finshed mosht of the bockles

Evening Menopaws . Pint of Codgers Wrath please. How come the place needed cleaning? Not been in for a couple of nights. Was their a shindig on last night?

Any entertainment on for tonight?

Can anyone tell me what day this is? I tried some of the home made hooch and then everything went blank. Perhaps if we added water, it might not be so potent.?

Good lord Marydoll , you've been in a drunken fugg for a week or more now! No wonder your turning green! And what have you done to Fat Willy? He's a shadow of his former self! Poor lad looks knackered!

Fat Willy, oh is that his name. It's Big Jim I'm worried about. I asked him to sample the hooch and the last thing I remember is him wandering into Soop's kitchen. What are we going to do. He will eat all their cakes.?

Fat Willy looks like he needs all the cakes he can get now Marydoll . He's looking positively emaciated! For goodness sake, give the lad a rest! no wonder you have to buy your keks in bulk from M&S!!!