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I don't want to just 'fill my time' when I retire!

(55 Posts)
Clickgran Wed 19-Jul-17 23:07:22

When I tell people that may retire soon, they say "Oh well you will need something to fill your time" I want to say "fill my time until what?" It reminds me of the sit com with Stephanie Cole called Waiting for God. I have a hobby, but I don't want to do that 24/7. Maybe it's entering into the unknown, I don't know. Any advise please, that isn't hobby or grandchildren related.

JanaNana Thu 20-Jul-17 12:21:05

I think retirement is a joy to some and a nightmare to others. Workaholics who don"t have many hobbies probably dread it most as all they can see is a big empty void in front of them wondering how they will fill it. Others who lead a busy life outside of work probably look forward to all the extra things they want to do when they retire that they don"t have time for now. It also depends on your circumstances as well as anything else. The novelty of not having to set the alarm is lovely in the beginning..also no more of the Monday morning feeling either. For me I have to have a bit of structure otherwise I would feel like Stephanie Cole in the sitcom!! Some hobbies can become paying hobbies if you are really good at them and keen to do it. Volunteering ...local Citizens Advice can be a big help for this. Our library always has notices up about volunteering. Not everyone sees themselves doing certain things but there are lots of ways to get involved in things and make new friends too. Some of the lesser known things are are giving an hour or two respite each week so that someone's carer can have a much needed break and get out of the house themselves. Food banks always needing volunteers . Befriending a lonely person ...so many things plus of course many charities looking for help. If you don"t fancy any of this ...evening classes starting up in September so maybe another hobby or two. Hope you find lots of things to fill any gaps you may find and enjoy your retirement to.

MissAdventure Thu 20-Jul-17 12:26:29

The hospitals always need volunteers. Ours are particularly asking for people to feed folk who need help. you could go into an elderly care home and do their nails with some varnish for them. flowers hope you enjoy whatever you do!

EllenT Thu 20-Jul-17 12:40:31

As everyone says, take your time and enjoy the opportunity to do so. Two specific suggestions: www.futurelearn.com has many, many free online courses (I'm currently taking genealogy and one about reading the modern novel; volunteering with the RVS (formerly WRVS) is very flexible, at least in our area. I drive folk to GP, etc, on one, two or no days a week chosen by me in advance. Enjoy whatever you choose to do! Or just sit back for a bit...

TwiceAsNice Thu 20-Jul-17 13:10:13

Enjoy doing things at a slower pace. I retired from full time work last summer. Had 6 months off and then have got myself a job 2 days, (10hrs) a week. I volunteer at a community centre for adults with learning disabilities , chat with some of the them but mostly spend the mornings knitting stuff for the centre to sell. Have made new friends doing this and also joined a local church which was very friendly and made new friends there. I have my grandchildren for tea every Thursday and tea and sleepovers in the holidays and mind them holiday times sometimes for my daughter to catch up with her own stuff as she works full time. I belong to a book club that meets one a month and I walk every day . I have time for those annoying little jobs you didn't have time for and as I only have a one bedroom flat I do amazingly keep up with the housework . Best of all I live very near my family so see them most days and live by myself so can do as I like. Enjoy your retirement decide what's important to you and just do it.

Tessa101 Thu 20-Jul-17 13:23:07

Luckygirl very impressive I think it's great to keep mind and body busy. I have a list of all the things I want to do or see with my time and I work part time, garden for the in capable and look after GD.

JulietFoxtrot Thu 20-Jul-17 13:32:54

Within 2 years of retiring, I had 2 part time jobs, working 2 days each week in total. I enjoy the company and mental stimulation they provide, and the money pays for my holidays. Plus they both involve doing things that I believe are socially useful, so I feel I'm doing something worthwhile. The difference from working before retirement, is that I still have 5 days a week to do all the other things just for the pleasure of them, as others have said, and I do some voluntary work as well. Also, because neither of them are career jobs, I could easily give them up if I started to feel they were too much for me, or stopped being enjoyable or interesting

HootyMcOwlface Thu 20-Jul-17 14:11:34

radicalnan grin

newnanny Thu 20-Jul-17 14:29:07

I agree with the many useful and interesting suggestions already made. I retired early on 7th July this year at 56 years and I am excited at having the time to do as I please. I have bought a house as a project which I am going to renovate myself and let out and I shall enjoy making it look nice and I love choosing interior decor. I am going on hols for 6 weeks for a complete rest and when I get back I have loads planned from sorting out 2 spare bedrooms and de-cluttering then redecorating, I will bake every week which I have not had time to do as frequently before, I aim to seriously prune the garden back as some of the trees and shrubs are rather overgrown, sort out the utility room which is a mess, travel more frequently, visit my sisters who live 150 miles away once a month, lunch out occasionally just as a start.

I would start off doing all the things you have not have time for before, holiday, relax and enjoy your time and if you do get bored then look around and find either voluntary work, part-time work,or new hobbies and interest.

chocolatepudding Thu 20-Jul-17 14:41:42

If you are looking for voluntary work opportunities have a look at this website

do-it.org

as this lists all sorts of volunteer jobs. good luck!

Legs55 Thu 20-Jul-17 15:09:31

Teddy123 my philosophy exactly. I love pottering in my garden, joined two local Meet Up groups, nice to have people to go out with (I'm widowed). I am a NT Member. Don't mind going places on my own. I took Early Retirement at 50 to care for my DH, following his death I had a year just adjusting.I'm only 62 now but unable to work due to health problems.

Almost 2 1/2 years ago I moved to be nearer my DD & DGC, my life has never been so busy. Take time to decide what you want to do & enjoy your Retirement.

Liz46 Thu 20-Jul-17 15:27:10

Mancgirl, what is ew rail fare? I presume from your name, you may be in Manchester. £10 seems cheap.

LuckyFour Thu 20-Jul-17 15:53:43

The first thing I did was go to my nearest National Trust property and volunteer one day a week, still doing it 7 years later - new interest, new friends, feeling useful, talking to a wide range of people from all over the world (visitors). I also go to two book groups, (again new like-minded friends etc), a poetry group, our local choir (I can't sing but I try), social club,and there is also the U3A, walking groups, art and craft groups. There is so much out there, who needs housework?

Direne3 Thu 20-Jul-17 16:00:43

radicalnan - I'll join with HootyMcOwlface. grin

rosesarered Thu 20-Jul-17 16:42:43

All the good advice above, plus........do what you like!
If you enjoy lying on the sofa with a bag of popcorn and watching Midsomer Murders at 2p.m. Then do it.Do what you like when you like.There is only one life ( as you, anyway) this isn't a rehearsal.?

mancgirl Thu 20-Jul-17 17:04:02

Hi Liz46. Virgin do occasional "sales" of tickets. The £10 each way fare was from Manchester. Booked another one for Decembersmile

Eglantine19 Thu 20-Jul-17 17:06:49

How come radicalnan is getting the cheesy grins? I'm the one with a lover, it should be me! grin

CardiffJaguar Thu 20-Jul-17 19:22:13

Don't plan before retiring. This is a strange time when for the first (probably) time in your life there are no demands on your time, other than the normal family ones. It takes time to adjust, up to a year for some. The family also needs time to adjust.

Maintain your usual out-of-home activities and accept some invitations that you feel you will enjoy. But let time pass without feeling you must do something. That something will happen before you realise it. Do things you have not done before such as explore a park you have never visited/ drive a route unknown to you/ go on a short holiday, say a week on a canal.

Whenever there is a big change in our lives it takes time to adjust and retirement is possibly the next to last of those. Making plans and dashing off to do other things is premature because when you have had time to adjust you realise those plans etc are not what you want to do.

Time is so important; use it to find yourself.

Clickgran Thu 20-Jul-17 20:30:13

Yes Kittylester I have supported Deaf children in school for 30 years, which I will miss but I am 65 so it is my time now. I would like to volunteer for something liked to that, teach people British Sign Language . Thank you for the list Luckygirl, I started a list today so will add some of them to it.

Clickgran Thu 20-Jul-17 20:38:33

Wise words from you all I really appreciate it and I feel far more positive now about my retirement than I did yesterday. CardiffJaguar, that is such a great thought, time is important, use it to find yourself. I will remember that.

Cherrytree59 Thu 20-Jul-17 22:03:24

Waking up in the morning and trying to work out what day it issmile

whitewave Thu 20-Jul-17 22:15:42

You truly will have no problem at all. I fill my days splendidly! I Garden enthusiastically. Walk a lot. Meet friends for lunch. Go to the theatre, Days out to say the NT or local gardens or London . I love watercolouring. I read . Evening visits to friends or they come here. Belong to a couple of clubs. In the autumn winter term I will go to evening classes if there are any I fancy. You will have no trouble at all, just wait and see. Sometimes I think don't fancy doing a thing today, so I don't!

Bellanonna Thu 20-Jul-17 22:42:59

I like that cherrytree ?
I usually have to think about what I did yesterday, then it comes to me.

Suzyb Thu 20-Jul-17 23:06:40

I retired 4 years ago but was dreading it as I thought I'd 'lose my identity'. I was never one for having hobbies although I do belong to a book club (wine club is a better name for it)! With my DH we became members of a house/animal sitting website. We love it...don't get paid for the sits but have stayed for free in some amazing houses in the past 4 years (most of which are regular bookings now). It's a worldwide organization so you can choose to housesit in some wonderful places. If you are a dog or cat lover then that's a bonus and you get to explore places you've never visited before. Our friends keep asking us when we'll next be home so we can meet up. I know it's not everyone's cup of tea but if you're outgoing and love life I'd say it's for you.

sarahellenwhitney Fri 21-Jul-17 07:38:20

You will be surprised how busy retirement can be. Enjoy.

JackyB Fri 21-Jul-17 11:51:44

Although I don't retire for another 3 years, I've been wondering about this. I agree with the OP that "filling time" sounds awful - like we're just marking time till our time comes.

Attitude is important: It is a beginning, not an end.

It would seem to me that the best way to adapt to a new life style is to do it step by step. For example, in the first month, get into a daily habit of catching up with friends - writing e-mails, phoning them, arranging dates or inviting them round.

Then the next month, introduce something like a daily walk for 30 minutes or so.

The third month, set a certain time aside each day for going through photos or decluttering cupboards.

If I try to change everything on the first day, I'll never start! I just hope I remember this idea when I do actually retire!