bbq - is it just me?

Oops! Last sentence gone a bit do-lally. Blame the heat

As a veggie I've never been given anything I'd want to eat at a BBQ. It smells horrible and takes hours then you get given a breadcrumb burger in a doughy white roll. No butter either. And you sit out in a stiff cold wind as night falls and the gnats come out.
I used to have neighbours who barbecued their dinner every night from May to September, three feet from my sitting room window. They found burnt food such fun that the children would be up screaming with excitement until 11 o'clock at night.
No thanks.

Last year I bought myself a pizza oven for my 70th Birthday. Now if we have people round I knock up some dough for the bases and everyone puts their own toppings on. It's a good way of getting rid of bits and pieces left over in the fridge.

When a man volunteers to do the barbecue, the following chain of events is put into motion:

1. The woman buys the food.
2. The woman makes a salad, prepares vegetables, and makes dessert.
3. The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.
4. THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
5. The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
6. The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he deals with the situation.
7. THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.
8. The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces and brings them to the table.
9. After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
10. Everyone PRAISES THE MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
11. The man asks the woman how she enjoyed her night off and, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing her.

Maw Yeah, Yeah, Yeah

???. Yes indeed Maw

Spot on Maw, the voice of experience!

I just enjoy being invited to any social get together , BBQ or not.

Fun is fun and I don't go for the food but if it is done well and of a good quality, whether it be only burgers and sausages etc , BBQ food can be really tasty.

It's all about the company really.

A few years ago we went to a 60th birthday garden party. The birthday girl's daughter had obviously worked very hard preparing some lovely canapés and was in evidence topping up everyone's glasses/plates etc.

There was no shortage of food and it was obvious from a quick glimpse in the kitchen - en route to the loo that she'd also made some lovely puds.

After a couple of hours the SIL appeared in full barbecuing gear. Burgers and sausages were cooked while his dearly beloved (see above) produced all the salads.

She then made sure the drivers were OK re soft drinks, tea coffee etc.

Guess who got the round of applause, back slapping etc.?

Not from us, I hasten to add.

MawBroon Spot on!!

POGS, your comment about social get togethers made me think, and actually I feel more relaxed at a BBQ gathering than sat round the dining table. I think it's because you can choose your own food more and not feel anyone is watching how much or how little you take!

On Sunday, to celebrate Fathers' Day I invited the family (6 adults and 4 children) round for Afternoon Tea - sandwiches, scones (homemade with jam & cream) and cake (Mr Kipling) instead of the traditional 'it's a hot day let's have a BBQ).

Far less work for me AND I got the recognition.

Didn't eat much myself as I'm low carb, but I was able to sit and enjoy the company once it was all set out.

That sounds like a great alternative Anya, I don't mind barbecues but hate sitting outdoors when its hot.
No sun tan for me. My daughter is much the same and says our only concession to summer is to let our skin go from blue to red.

If it's the husbands/partners/other family members who love BBQs then tell them it will involve them doing all the other side preparations and cleaning away too as you will consider it your day off taking responsibility for the meal. Don't make a martyr of yourself and then complain. Nothing makes you do it if you don't want to.

I totally agree with all of you about who does all the work. Just recently though I was going out for the day on a Sunday and my other half decided to ask some members of his family over for a BBQ. "I will do everything" he said and true to his word, he went out and bought the lot (except the beers as we already had some in). I told him how much it would cost and he said "ridiculous".
I left him to it. When I got home just after all the visitors had gone I discovered he had spent "far more" than he thought he would have to and he had "only bought a few burgers, sausages and chicken" and salad, and bread, and soft drinks for the kids and some white wine, as he didn't have any in, and some crisps etc etc. And, wait for it, he was so busy doing all the things I normally do that he burnt the lot. And it mean burnt. Totally incinerated. That apparently was the fault of the charcoal - it got too hot.
He had cleared everything up and put most of it away. The house was full of little bits of garden - but no matter! He looked totally exhausted. Next time I think I might he appreciated a bit more. ?

We recently moved, and bought a new bbq, which i wanted to try out when just us, so I would feel happy entertaining with it. So we were going to have a little one on Saturday evening, until OH decides he wants a ready meal curry instead, but why don't we do a bbq on Sunday for his Pa & family to celebrate Father's Day! So, not only no dry-run, but now running round madly IN THE STINKING HEAT trying to get all the meat and fish, plus get the salads and pudding done, plus find the one place on the Island which hasn't run out of proper charcoal. Then of course OH can't actually do the BBQ (big girl's blouse who is terrified of fire), plus can't be trusted to do last minute salad-y things either, so i ended up serving charcoal sausages because I was busy making a salad, while he and his family sat around drinking wine and eating all the snacky things up, then starting on the main event while I was still tending the fire and finishing cooking. It wasn't what I had planned at all! At least nobody reported food poisoning the following day ?

Never have been a fan. Never organised one. Have been invited to many but never go. Much prefer cream teas al fresco.

Not finding charcoal reminds me of when visiting D and family with S and his wife and GD.
They were living in Antigua and we had the most wonderful selection of fish.
Another expat said his gardener produced his own charcoal soSiL went over to fetch it. I can't remember exact times but if it was lit at 6pm it was ready to cook on by 11ish, by which time we were all under the weather, the coals were so hot the fish just dried out and was like shoe leather and no- one wanted to eat any way
S fell asleep and the mozzies had the feast of their lives on him.

oh I am so glad I am not in the minority. BBQ's are a recipe for a huge amount of work. I can prepare and cook a three course meal in the time my husband faffs about with two pieces of chicken. Temperature too low, chicken cooked for far too long so dried out and he thinks he is doing me a favour! Plus the kitchen door wide open for hours so all the local flies gain entry while I try to keep salads, bread, salad dressings, fruit etc., in a hygienic condition.

I had two barbecues at the weekend and both were fine fior some and awful for others.

The Saturday one we were invited to and eleven people attended. The hostess had bought, prepared and slaved all day to get things ready for the table and the fire. It was lovely for her guests to sit drinking, eating nibbbles and chatting but it transpired that the host wasn't even going to do the cooking. The poor woman stood in front of a flaming fire for an hours and a half and cooked the meat for eleven other adults. It was so unfair. And then the host let his wife clear up too.

The Sunday barbecue was our own and nearly caused a divorce. I had suggested steak and chips outdoors but the young peole wanted a proper barbie. I shopped for and prepared all the meats, salads and accompaniments, laid the table and organised the drinks on my own. The meats, dishes and cooking implements wre all laid out for the chef so all he had to do was cook.

The chef was affected by the heat (and failed to acknowledge that it was the same for the rest of us), failed to get the barbecue out of the shed on time or test it (it only had one outing last year). He was in a furious temper and sulk about this, about the barbie failing to light first time and being hot. He ruined the evening for everyone with bad grace and humour and then took an hour to clear everything up when we all wanted him to sit and socialise. The barbecue took two and a half hours from start to finish for an overabundance of cooked meats most of which were left.

I had foreseen all of this happening but was shouted down.

The good thing to come out of it is that we have had a calmer conversation about it all and are going to get rid of the barbecue. If anyone wants ribs, sausages, burgers, pork, lamb, steak and pork on one plate in future I will do it in the kitchen where it will be properly cooked and not burnt outside and raw inside. Needless to say there will not be seven meats on any one plate in future because this is unreasonable from many points of view.

So al fresco=good, barbie=bad.

Sorry for the mistakes- for, people, ten etc.

I think they are overrated.I believe it was James Martin who said he had never tasted anything cooked on a barbecue that would not have tasted better cooked in the oven I do tend to agree with this.However we have just returned from a caravanning holiday in Wales and the smell of everyone cooking on their barbecues in the evening was lovely.!

MawBroon you've got that just right. It's hard work, and I hate the cleaning of the grill afterwards. Ours is about 25 inches wide, so it doesn't fit in the sink or the dishwasher for a soak. So I have to put a towel in the bottom of the bath and leave it in soak for a couple of days, then I'm on my knees scrubbing it clean, then cleaning the greasy bath afterwards. I would chuck the whole thing away, but it was a present from my son and I think he would be upset.

Since when is standing on a poky bit of grass,eating anaemic undercooked sausages and greasy overcooked economy burgers whilst swilling down supermarket-brand lager from paper cups (and overshadowed by a neighbours full line of washing and their kiddies screeching & whooping whilst bouncing themselves silly on their garden trampoline) a social occasion of any description?

But I suppose it appeases the caveman streak in the modern man.....