Is it a salad shortage or is this just the tip of the iceberg?
Queues were reported in high streets this morning, not seen since the dark days of Northern Rock. The spirit of the 1940's was sadly lacking as hard hands grabbed a greengrocer's soft fruit. 'It's only some vegetables that are short', he wailed but his words were drowned under a high-pitched moan.
A small girl sat crying; 'My Gran made me eat a bent carrot. She said they are all the same in the end; but it wasn't. It was bent!.' Distraught vegans held a secret street-side meeting, ultimately disappearing in ones and twos towards the vegetable section at Iceland.
While the weather was said to be responsible, there were no shortage of theories for the current horrendous predicament but most thought it would all be over by Christmas.