Are You Hugger ?

I'm not a natural hugger. I lived in a Med country for a while and everyone b****y hugged. It just feels so disingenuous. I try to avoid hugging, but am happy to hug family and good friends.

Fist bumps spread fewer germs than handshakes.
GC (6-22) offer and accept hugs which is lovely.Only the 2 year old is still into kisses, head or cheek only.
I don't know how it happened but the two kiss thing at one time used to miss for me. On several occasions I found I'd accidentally kissed someone's neck! Inappropriate or what?!

I have a friend who hugs anyone and everyone. I think it says a lot more about her needs than anything else. Someone she knew had been diagnosed with cancer, friend goes in for a hug, person says, NO. But she tells her she needs a hug and does it anyway! Arrogant or what? I only hug people I know really well and ask my 7 year old grandson if he wants a hug, wouldn't presume and want him to know that it's ok to say no

I never came from a kissy-huggy family, and the first time a friend hugged me as a teenager, I was quite taken aback...however, now I am the huggiest mum & grandma ever! I never want my family to be surprised or shocked by a hug! Whomever its from, a hug can't hurt you, and can mean the world to someone! Remember, they might not be hugging you for you, they might need it for themselves, and I see no reason to deny anyone some closeness! But these are my views, I wouldn't go to hug anyone if I can see they weren;t comfortable. xxx

Don't mind hugs and kisses from close friends and family. However, I was appalled when going to stay in a B and B ( we'd stayed there one night years before)I was greeted by an enormous kiss on the mouth from the host.

Yikes, Gaggi!

CaliBoingo Having spent the almost the same amount of time in the US, and as an American, I agree. I prefer a one-armed hug from family and close friends to that stupid mwhaa mwhaa air kissing. That just give me the creeps.

I agree. I don't even like air kissing but that is often hard to avoid.
I seem able to show with my body language that a hug is not going to be welcome. Hugging is for people you are close to unless maybe someone is obviously very unhappy or distressed but even then it may not be welcome.

I wasn't brought up in a touchy feely sort of way and I find it hard to hug and kiss unless my heart is really in it. Body language has been mentioned on here and mine must be a dead give away. My daughters chap comes from a family of enthusiastic huggers and they thought I didn't like them. I like them very much but wish they'd held their horses until I knew them better. My daughter explained!
I never know quite how to deal with the each side kissing that's offered and it all feels very awkward. Reserved? Me?
Just English of a certain vintage.

Yes, I am a hugger! I admit it. I am not ashamed of it. I do it in public and in private :-)

Joking apart I have found that some children do not like to be hugged so I offer my hand to shake instead and that fits the bill. My dil is half German so I get a kiss both sides but not one of those awful mwa, mwa, kind of kisses they are gross. They mean nothing and so I avoid them like the plague. I love a hug from my G children and they like to be hugged a lot so that suits me fine.

As for a B&B owner to smack a kiss on the lips that is totally out of order! Did you slap him back? I would have cancelled my stay right there and then. Were there locks on the bedroom doors or not? Just asking.

I'm a hugger more than a kisse. Hugs are good ?

I would give anyyyyythinggggg for a hug..... there's no-one to do it here ......

I know how you feel Maidmarion, but for me it would have to be only from someone I knew very well or family members. At least now I have granddaughters I can give them a hug anytime.

Hugs are nice when they're spontaneous and affectionate - but not when they're a social obligation. Now I'm getting older, I also dislike patronising hugs from young people who are in positions of authority. They always call you 'dear' as well, which I hate. I may be old, but I'm not senile, and I'm not a dear. I'm a vitriolic old bat, and proud of it!

Maranta.... Yes, I agree ... but my grandchildren are four thousand miles away.... (((

Having been brought up in the care system and never being hugged,it wasn`t the done thing. After leaving the care system at 18 yrs. old someone hugged me and I just froze. Now I`m grateful for all the hugs I get from anyone.

I hate being hugged or kissed by anyone except close family and DH hates it even more. But we have come to accept some hugs/airkisses from some friends though we dontvreally like it!
With the littlest grandchildren i love a hug and kiss the top of their heads . I find 'the peace' in church excruciating and know a lot of others feel the same way. Why on earth have they started doing this?
If someone is upset i dont know what to do - a hug feels very awkward although i see others doing it. Id also hate to be on the receiving end except for DH or any of my children. I think i must come across as cold and reserved!

Yes, I agree about 'the peace'. DH and I just stand there, (kissing him in church doesn't seem appropriate to me, or him, though we are on good terms and do a fair share of kissing at home). Neither do we want to shake hands with each other. We shake the hands of those in the seats in front and behind and wave to the organist. The whole thing takes longer and longer as most folks then go on walkabout kissing and shaking hands with everyone.

I have been looking in at this thread on and off since yesterday (agree with your view, pollyperkins) and have only just noticed that the title is 'Are You Hugger'?

Must admit I love a good hug but only family and close freinds when I am feeling low or out of sorts I ask my oh for a hug it makes me feel better . I wouldn't force GC to hug or kiss but love it when they do ?‍❤️‍?‍?

Dont like hugs from strangers, a handshake is better. Love hugs from my Family.
Kiss on cheek from a stranger I dont like either, where does all this come from, America and France?

Rather have hugs than kisses but don't initiate them. Went to the school Christmas concert ( where I used to work) and one of our ex pupils came over to hug me. I was so moved especially as he is on the spectrum! Amazing what one little hug can do!

I feel awkward if someone approaches for a hug, or worse, a kiss. However I do wish I didn't, it must be lovely to be relaxed enough to embrace everyone. My only exception are my daughters and GC, they get hugged every time I see them - most days.

grannyactivist that's made me want to cry. ?

Not a touchy feel family as I grew up. My sister and I therefore did not hug friends or family. My closest friends hug me and I've worked hard at responding. Close friends and family. I now want to and do respond, but only to my closest . I enjoy it now but it took a lot of work to be comfortable

pollyperkins when I used to go to church regularly over 20 years ago they used to say "peace be with you" and shake hands with the people in front of you and behind you. I can't see anything wrong with that, but we certainly didn't used to hug or kiss. It was a Church of England church.