Labelling Children

To all those who really do have a child suffering with some condition or syndrome that needs help I really am sorry. Life is hard on parents as well as children. They are not spongers or lazy people, they are people who are trying to cope with problems most of us could not even imagine. I take my hat off to them. They deserve a medal because everyday is a struggle and it lasts a life-time. They need support and understanding not insults or criticism.

Not quite straight Anya,more like brow beating and refusing to accept other people's opinions.
Most people are aware of children with special needs,and most of us know a child with special needs,
If,as some believe these things are on the increase,then that is another topic for discussion,Why.the answer to that could be[in my very humble opinion] because a label Can be applied giving an excuse.
Not in any way saying this applies to most.

Heaven forbid I should have a stupid opinion you disagree with.
I thought this site was all for that.
Discussion,that's the word isn't it?
Please be aware you may encounter people with a smaller brain than yours on this site.
Tolerance may be called for.

Hi Lisalou

You say you are a teacher, in which case I find it outrageous that you are discussing one of your pupils on an open Internet forum. Whatever happened to respecting privacy! You say:

"I just had one child diagnosed with late development of the left brain and I feel frustrated. The boy started the school year doing zilch and getting bad marks, with a lot of help and support, as well as a strict approach to homework and study, he has come a long way. I can see him now slipping back as he is justified. Poor boy, that explains his laziness, cocky attitude and the downright lying about homework. "

As a teacher I would have hoped you wouldn't go out and discuss private matters!!

Lost for words!

Anya I am so pleased to see your post at 9.40 today. I have tried very hard since this thread started to express my feelings and failed miserably. Your penultimate paragraph did it for me.

I collect my DGS from school on Fridays to give his parents a chance to just talk, have a meal, go to the cinema, alone together or with friends for a few hours respite. He used to stay the night with me but won't at the moment so that curtails the time they have.

Yesterday he lost one of his gloves during playtime. The staff assured me they would search for it after everyone had gone and return it on Monday. They felt sure of finding it. We left the building and were crossing the playground when DGS remembered and wanted his glove. That was the only thing on his mind - no amount of explanation could get through and he flipped into a meltdown. And no, it wasn't a temper tantrum, I can tell the difference. However many of the parents of 'normal' children tutted and muttered as they passed by, but the children were asking me if (name) was alright and if we needed some help.

Together DGS and I worked through it and were able to continue with our Friday routine of going to the library to choose a DVD to watch.

Thank you, Marmark! I've never been to a hospice bit I nursed my darling daddy who last year died of cancer and last Thursday I had my own appointment at the Cancer Centre for follow ups on my breast cancer. I retire defeated!

Thank you Anya for your post .It was spot on.AndSwanny I can identify exactly with what you are saying.I have had a similar experience over a glove and the response of other parents.

Yes, thank you Anya a lot of us feel the same here, depressing isn't it, the lack of understanding and easy answers trotted out on here.A lot if us can identify with that episode Swanny been there got the t shirt ( well, the broken glasses anyway!)
I remember driving along with ( then small) GDS in his little seat taking off his shoes and throwing them at my head, ( managed to stay on the road, just.)
I shan't bother with this thread anymore, I can just tell it will get worse and worse.

I find it extraordinary that the same ridiculous platitudes trotted out years ago are still being perpetuated by some on GN. Research into neurology and psychology has moved us on so much and given us the resources to help the children who really need it. To hear all the old chestnuts trotted out about lazy, undisciplined children and incompetent parents makes me despair. Yes there are children who don't work to their ability, yes their are parents who have different attitudes to discipline, but teachers know this and accommodate such things. To imagine that teachers can't deal with both is to devalue the profession once again. (Although with people like Lisalou in it I can understand why this happens)

Oh yes Swanny, I can so understand the lost glove episode, and also how people who don't know would put this down to a tantrum - as I'm sure they will on here. Does your DGS also become obsessed with some area of interest? Mine used to be a fund of information about Minecraft. He now can tell you about all the Pokemon characters in excruciating detail.

And mine knows all there is to know about lorries: how many axels they have and why some are called wag and drag. It is all terribly boring but you have to show interest.

This thread is a bit curious to me.

To have so many posters who somewhat agree with the op, when I thought it had become mainstream and more to accept that chilrden and adults have autism, aspergers, asthma, and ADHD etc.

Perhaps there are some who shouldnt have the label? [not that I know any that shouldn't in the slightest. In fact the opposite, as I said].

I did look up late development of the left brain however[never heard of it or anyone diagnosed with it myself], and am surprised to discover the NHS dont seem to cover it, and there is nothing much on google about it that I can find.

Who diagnosed it Lisalou?

And is it a proper medical condition?

Trisher I totally agree with your post I find it incredible that people still put all our various differences down to bad behaviour bad kids poor parenting etc etc

Wake up doubters and read up instead of doubting and blaming

Late development of the left brain would affect language acquisition and sensation and movement in the right side of the body. Potentially significant issues.

It is interesting that it's generally agreed that more boys than girls are high on the autism scale and that when you think about the area of obsessive knowledge, such as sports statistics or the old train spotting, I guess you'd think of men

Sorry I can't remember who said about once a child is labled it stays on a data base and follows them for the rest of their lives, good ! That's why we paid for S to be diagnosed. Due to his problems he is unable to find anyone willing to employ him despite many job applications. DWP were going to stop his UC but due to the diagnosis at least he continues to get some money. I take a small amount of 'keep' from him which affords him some self worth. I don't know if he could cope living alone, even if he could he couldn't afford it.

It doesn't! There is no big database. Child health medical records are destroyed after a certain number of years. Forget the term 'label'. We're really talking about diagnoses. Professionals don't use 'labels'.

There are many many children on the A.S, or have A.D.H.D and many other issues and all the care, understanding and help we can give must be given and and no-one disputes that in anyway, there are also children (just like adults) who are lazy, disruptive and down right aggressive and its either nature or nurture.
No-one is saying every child that has been statemented is a fraud, far from it but we know there are few parents who push and push for a label for the wrong reasons.

Badenkate and Greenfinch yes my little man has been fascinated since he was about 3 with sharks and whales, identifying the different species and what they each eat.

Where is the OP? Would be interesting to read her views in the light of the above comments.
For what it's worth, I worked in SEN until very recently and, yes, there is increased 'labelling', but that is for a purpose - not as an excuse. So-called 'labelling' means that the child learns (and behaves) in a particular way due to whatever is happening in their brain. The 'labelling' means they can be given help when they are young and strategies to manage for themselves when they are older. Ideally, they can then live a useful, productive and, most importantly, content life.
Again, for what it's worth, Statements were always rare and are now non-existent. They've been replaced with Educational Health Care Plans which continue till the person is 25, to take care of all aspects of their life. Still incredibly difficult to get though.

Stage two breast cancer all lymph nodes affected also traveled to my neck,9 years ago now.
A sister two BILs and a brother died of cancer in the last ten years.a very dear nephew battling a brain tumour today.
My dear friends nephew who was severely autistic killed by a car.Her GS who is also severely autistic having problems at school.
Yes,there definitely are genuine people out there,real people,good people,we here are just a handful.

Marmark I really sorry to hear of your and your familes illnesses and sad losses.
However, I'm not sure what cancer has to do with children/adults who have ASD or ADHD etc. and the fact that the world is full of "good, genuine people"

Thank you ninathenana,
No,your right,I'm really answering josiebear,
The good and the genuine rant is because there are one or two here who I feel are neither.Sadly went and seen nephew yesterday,and so so sad to see him,guess I'm a little annoyed he is suffering like that.
Any way over and out,I'll shut up now,leave it to the experts.

I have taken a long time to answer, as I have been reading each and every post which has been made, and it has taken some time.

For one, so many of you accuse me of callousness, which I find hurtful, and question my ability as a teacher, which is equally uncalled for; for one, you do not know me, and are basing your opinion on my entire career on one comment, also you do not know how I treat the children, you have no idea.

As it happens, the boy I talk of as lazy and cocky, I know very well and love a great deal. His mother is a very dear friend. When he does his work, he gets great grades across the board, with the exception of one subject, which is foreign language. It is also the case that I coach this boy out of school on a one to one basis for free, to help him; I dont have to tell you this, but feel that it may give you a little insight into the case at hand.

As for the poster who accuses me of discussing a Student on an open forum and not respecting the privacy of said Student – please tell me what confidential information I have given you? Name? School? Location? For goodness sake, get real. You dont even know what country I am in.

For those of you who speak of their own families I apologise if I did not make clear what I was trying to say. It was never my intention to offend you. I am well aware that there are many children with special needs out there, who really need their diagnosis. Teachers are not only happy to know of their conditions, but delighted that there is now so much help available (I did in my original post say how much we appreciate the extra resources we have these days)

I was actually speaking about families where children are diagnosed, not with autism in particular, but ASD or ADHD in an off the cuff manner – usually cases where the parents have pushed and pushed for these diagnoses and who seem to be proud of the label and do use it as an excuse.

Where I live, (I wont say where, I would not want to disclose too much information for reasons stated above) it is very easy to get a diagnosis and I fear that some of them are given out without enough investigation, leading to children who are diagnosed incorrectly and yes, I have seen such cases.

Just because I think that sometimes diagnoses are given out in haste (and I say sometimes, not all the time) it does NOT affect the way I work with any of my children. Please do not presume to tell me that I am a bad teacher for that reason. In fact, I care a great deal, have a friend with a severe condition whom I also teach and who is doing very well thanks to the extra help he receives with the teaching assistants.

Jane 10, that is what i thought too, but the boy plays football (well, I am told - not a sport i am mad about) and is articulate and bright.