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opting out from having a funeral.

(109 Posts)
Mildred Sun 12-Jun-16 08:51:42

when my friend died her funeral was brilliant, if you can say that about a funeral, but the ceremony was conducted by her sister in law who knew my friend very well, and it really was very emotional and I could understand how it helped people cope with their grief.

My mother's was much quieter and the person conducting the ceremony was recounting what he had been told by family and friends a very different feeling and not the same emotional release.

So interested in other people's ideas and experiences.

Gagagran Sun 12-Jun-16 08:45:36

My DH has left his body to medical science and stipulated that he does not want a funeral or any wake. My DD told him that it is not up to him about a wake but I would try to follow his wishes if he dies before me.

Mourning the passing of someone is surely not a one-off event at a funeral but goes on as long as anyone is left to remember that person.

janeainsworth Sun 12-Jun-16 08:42:23

You can donate your body to medical research. GandT.

I once went to a funeral where, in accordance with the deceased's wishes. there was no music, no readings, nothing said about her life, no tribute of any kind.

It may have been what the deceased wanted, but the feeling I was left with was an emptiness and a sense that the person had not cared about anyone else, or thought that anyone cared about her.

A funeral can be a celebration of someone's life and a great comfort to those left behind.

Pittcity Sun 12-Jun-16 08:38:21

Some people just send the body to be cremated with no ceremony and have some sort of memorial later.

kittylester Sun 12-Jun-16 08:35:33

I wondered too GandTea confused

GandTea Sun 12-Jun-16 08:33:54

How can you not have a funeral ? When you die, your body has to be disposed of in some way and your friends will mourn/celebrate regardless. Unless of course, you get some premonition of your death and can crawl under a remote hedge somewhere.

Jenty61 Sun 12-Jun-16 08:09:30

no I dont think it is reasonable I personally think its selfish...a funeral is a way for friends and relatives to say goodbye....you dont have to have a religious funeral you can have a non religious celebrant conducting the service...

Mildred Sun 12-Jun-16 08:08:38

I'm a non believer and am interested in the responses to this question. The only thing In favour of a funeral is it allows an outpouring of grief which I think is beneficial for their loved ones.

Daisychain Sun 12-Jun-16 08:02:23

It it reasonable for someone to wish not to have a funeral, especially if they are a non believer?