Thoughtful Posting

That did cross my mind

A thread about a thread never begins, middles or ends well.

There once was a forum called Gransnet,
Whose tone made sensitive types fret,
So along came a mender
Tried to make it more friendlier
But instead caused far more upset!

Love Grannylynes rhyme!

Well said*Anya*

Imperfect; there is a minority who post with a no-nonsense attitude; the result is carping and insensitivity. Posting in a forthright manner is a platitude for rudeness and lack of empathy.

There is a clique in one blog section, who prey on GN's "they" consider they can publicly look small and miserable. *There should be
a gaping head of a crocodile to warn the unsuspecting in that section*.

To GNHQ
Time to scrutinise and block posts on finding insensitive, rude and hurtful ones. Also, to warn the initiator, then remove them if they
refuse to apologise - to those concerned.

*Also, warn those who receive PMs they must not reveal any part of
it. I would have thought this too be a no brainer*.

I honestly don't believe bags post (whisper - which was on another thread) was meant to be combatitive. Blunt yes. That's bags. Always has been. Hopefully always will be. And, my God!, we've had some run-ins in the past!

Oh! come on everybody. This has probably been the most enjoyed, and probably most widely read, by GNrs and lurkers alike, in a long time!

Thank you imperfect.

thread

I don't like rhymes which accuse others of talking shit. Unnecessary. And feeble.

Luckyducky the problem for GNHQ is one of definition. One persons "insensitive, hurtful or rude" is another's well meant honest and down to earth opinion. I for one would find a sanitised Gransnet a dull place to be. As it is, it just reflects everyday life in all its infinite variety.

I don't understand Luckyducky's post there. I mean, literally.

Where is the "one blog section" referred to, please?

I'm glad I'm not the only one confused about the 'blog' bit.

What blog?

I am not sure that I agree with Luckyducky's post.
Firstly, I thought the site was policed by GN, and that personal attacks are against the rules but that an attack on someone's opinions is not. There can be a fine dividing line which could be blurred, or a remark could be perceived differently by different posters.

Personally I think the post in question was an attack on an opinion but the OP was in a state of anxiety (very understandable) at the time so perhaps it was best not to ask the opinion of people you don't know at that time because certain answers could upset you further.

Secondly, I don't think we need a crocodile as a warning because we are not children who need a Board of Censors to let us know something could upset us.

Thirdly - what is this blog with a 'clique' who prey on GNs? (peers through rainy window in vain)

re the pms, if someone sent a very hurtful one it would be worse than a rude post. Cowardly imo. As imperfect says - would you mind your views being requoted in public?
So better to say something in a post - or not at all!

I for one would find a sanitised Gransnet a dull place to be.

Yes, I would agree with that Jane10. In RL people are often afraid to be as straightforward and blunt as they feel they would like to be, so we are sometimes living in an unsuspecting bubble of 'niceness', totally oblivious of the real opinions of other people.
Here on GN people feel more free to be honest in expressing themselves and offering their opinions to others, which makes for lively and interesting debate. I'm not condoning rude or hurtful comments - there is never an excuse for nastiness, no matter what one thinks of another's views. Putting one's views across clearly and calmly, even if it is not what the OP wants to hear, is perfectly possible as thatbags demonstrates.
For what it's worth, I don't believe the OP meant any harm in starting this thread. If she'd been a member for longer she would have known from experience how it would evolve, and might have thought twice about posting. But I can understand how it's put some GN's backs up because it does have that 'come along children, play nicely' feel, which of course is rather irritating. No-one likes being told how to behave, least of all by a relative newcomer.
This is my first real contribution to this thread. I've been a member since last March, but I'm still inclined to hold back on long threads with lots of heated debate

HQ do scrutinise the posts - but sometimes their decisions are different from those I (or indeed others) might make. Apparently it is fine to tell another poster to "sod off"! - not where I live it ain't!

Just as we might ignore someone who said such a thing to us in real life, so we should do here.

Can I summarise?
Yes there is a problem, but no it cant get sorted as people are people on an internet forum.

In this I feel Luckyducky should come back with an explanation so that this "clique" are given a chance to explain and clear themselves or not as the case may prove to be. It is not enough to make a statement like that and then leave it.

Hear hear annsixty

Don't do it Luckyducky it'll only end badly.

Now that would open a can of worms! Or has it already been opened!!

LuckyDucky Why should GNHQ have to police posts for things people are offended by? If you are offended why not say so. I for one would always apologise for causing offence, although not necessarily for the post, as something may cause offence, but be accurate and regarded by others as fair comment.
We are adults and we don't need the grown ups to step in and sort things out.

"*Also, warn those who receive PMs they must not reveal any part of
it" (from luckyduck's post.)

HQ did suggest this way back when. But I think nasty PMs should be exposed on the thread. Best way to discourage same.