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Is this it?

(78 Posts)
Minnie58 Sat 23-Jan-16 10:57:38

Hi everyone, have read some great posts on here but always been the watcher and this is my first time writing anything.
Does anyone else feel slightly put out about getting on a bit? I find myself surrounded by my DDs and daughters in law who are all young and beautiful and have given me a dozen GC between them!
I associate more with them than friends my own age and maybe that is why I feel ancient and creaky. I try to look my best but have gradually put weight on over the past few years and I am finding that I can't leave my bedroom on a morning without a full face of make up just to make myself feel better. Should I accept that at 56 that's how it's going to be from now on?

Jalima Thu 28-Jan-16 17:21:16

I achieved lots of 'firsts' after I was 56 (but I have never run a Marathon and am not likely to now!)
I don't mean winning firsts, rather the first time I ever did anything new.

OlderNoWiser Thu 28-Jan-16 16:52:51

See you there, Caramac !!! ... no doubt I'll be somewhere near the back smile

Caramac Thu 28-Jan-16 16:35:07

OlderNoWiser I totally resonate with your post and I too am training for the London Marathon smile
OP I'm 55 and work full time; I always wear make up on work days grin

Jalima Thu 28-Jan-16 15:55:02

Well my friends and I, in our 70s, thoroughly enjoyed ourselves when we were out last week; ailments discussed and dismissed in the first five minutes (just an update on a friend coping with new medication) then on to much more interesting and hilarious topics!
Mind you, the oldest one said she has stopped going out with another bunch of friends because they either have nothing much to say or are talking about their ailments.

annodomini Thu 28-Jan-16 15:36:45

Blondehedgehog, to your list of what we oldies talk about, you can add grandchildren which are a little more interesting than ailments. However, my GC may be an absorbing topic for me, but how interesting is it for my friends?

Blondehedgehog Thu 28-Jan-16 15:07:29

My goodness 56 is a young un

I have friends much older than me and I find them depressing. All they talk about is their illness'es, cost of living and the weather. After a visit from them I feel drained and depressed.

I have the usual aches and pains that come with old age and am in remission from cancer

I will be 70 in the summer, I always make sure my hair is tidy, wear a little make up, even if I do not go out. Dress in comfortable but not fuddy duddy clothes I travel abroad for two months of a year to visit my sons and their families

If you start thinking old then you will become old. I don't like the old lady that looks at me from the mirror but she will not put me down.

Jalima Thu 28-Jan-16 14:42:47

I think younger women seem to have firmer fat than someone like me who has too much tummy (not firm).
But then I read that the muscle can split during pregnancy and never knits together and that could be the reason. hmm

My theory is that flabby fat is easier to lose than firm fat, so there is still hope. grin

Willow500 Tue 26-Jan-16 12:24:53

Lol Rubylady! I lost over 3 stone a few years ago and my husband even more - I've put a stone back on and he's now back to his original weight so last night we started on a new diet regime. Unfortunately this morning I found a bar of chocolate he bought me last week in my office drawer so thought I'd better get rid of it and then start tomorrow blush. I've also noticed that overweight young people look a different shape to older people - I think it's also to do with muscle and skin degeneration. Heavy boobs at 20 are a lot firmer than heavy boobs at 60 sad

Badenkate Tue 26-Jan-16 08:30:10

Love it Rubylady ?

rubylady Tue 26-Jan-16 01:39:25

I went on a great diet once, I lost 11 and a half stone overnight - I divorced the bugger! grin

gettingonabit Mon 25-Jan-16 12:53:37

I'm not quite morbidly obese (yet)grin but I'm finding it harder and harder. I used to be a 10 (albeit a starving one) and although I'm still "only" a 12 I'm finding it hard to avoid getting lumps, bumps and a belly. I've got no waist, either.

I've noticed that overweight middle-aged women look different in shape from overweight younger ones and I'm interested to know whether women tend to put on weight differently as they age.

OlderNoWiser Mon 25-Jan-16 12:39:40

From my experience I don't think it is inevitable to put on weight. I did not gain that much, just a few pounds, but it seemed the start of something more, so I wanted to put a stop to it there and then.

My OH was very skinny when I met him 30 years ago and is now morbidly obese, and it is obvious why - he never stops eating and when he sits, he sits for hours. It's just sheer laziness and lack of willpower. He is the perfect example of how not to do it!

gettingonabit Mon 25-Jan-16 10:53:15

Mine's gone on my belly too, lucky, and it's proving hard to shift. I've always struggled with my weight, but always got rid of it.

Buggersad

Luckygirl Mon 25-Jan-16 10:09:52

I have gained a small amount of weight; and it seems to have redistributed itself, favouring belly over boobs!

gettingonabit Mon 25-Jan-16 09:19:23

Brilliant, older.

I sometimes,wonder whether weight gain is inevitable as one gets older. sad

Willow500 Sun 24-Jan-16 20:32:46

Well done OlderNoWiser that's some turnaround! I'm 62 next month and never really think is this it but my husband certainly does and has done since he was 56!. We both still work full time so I'm not sure what IT could be but I often think wasting time trying to find it is counter productive and a bit depressing. We should live for today and enjoy what we have. I do know that I also look in the mirror and see my mum (and dad) looking back at me but they both lived their lives to the full until AZ robbed them of it in their late 80's so I try to keep positive and just get on with it! smile

OlderNoWiser Sun 24-Jan-16 15:56:45

As somebody who is also 56 this year I can see where you are coming from. I think it maybe part of the menopause, it makes you suddenly realise that you are not 20 anymore in a very physical way.

When I hit 50 I also started putting on weight, got a bit lazy, tea and biscuits were a great comfort, ditto chocolate ditto wine ... then, last year, I looked in the mirror and thought - no way, not yet, and started walking, then jogging, then running.

I am now training for the London Marathon, have lost the weight and my doctor tells me I have the fitness level of a 30-year-old. So, within reason, anything is possible at any age and I now no longer think of my age. All I think about when I wake up in the morning is: nothing's hurting, I feel great, let's get on with it smile

Jalima Sun 24-Jan-16 15:17:52

grannylyn have you nodded off?

I must confess, I may do in a minute or two (joys of being retired). wink

grannylyn65 Sun 24-Jan-16 14:54:09

?

Luckygirl Sun 24-Jan-16 11:23:35

One of the things that people worry about when they get to their 50s is the potential loss of a useful role, but I have found that I still have useful roles in my family and community - they are just different from before.

Being a Mum is pretty all-consuming, and your role is clearly defined and definitely useful; when that goes, and work roles go, then you do have to readjust.

But the OP is fit and well and it would be sensible to grasp life while that is still the case. It may not last - I speak from experience!

And we do not always have to be useful - a bit of self indulgence now that the possibility presents itself is not to be sneezed at!

Nonnie Sun 24-Jan-16 11:01:07

I think back to when my children were young and as they grew up I never looked back to when they were 'the best age'. I enjoyed them at whatever age they were and enjoy them as adults too. I hope I do the same with myself because there is no point in doing otherwise, it would only make me miserable.

I am not going to list all the tough things I have had to cope with but do remember some years ago talking to my sister who was still very bitter. It made me realise that I was not and that as a result I was so much happier than her.

I try every day to think of things to be grateful for and it works for me.

At 56 I was working with mainly younger people and seen as 'everyone's mum'. Now that I am retired I am the go to person for anything finance related and everyone's CV so I still feel useful, just in a different way.

Jane10 Sun 24-Jan-16 10:49:34

If this is 'it' its fine by me. I seem to have become temporarily becalmed in a good place. I love my new 'retired' life with lots of interesting things to do and best of all new GSs to love. It won't last. I know that having had some bad times in the past. However, its important to recognise the good times while they're here rather than in retrospect. PS I look a right minger but it doesn't seem to matter any more!

Jalima Sun 24-Jan-16 10:27:08

GH is presumably Good Husband Imperfect27 smile

Imperfect27 Sun 24-Jan-16 10:25:31

Oooops - that went wrong! Meant to 'strike through' GH!!!!

Jalima Sun 24-Jan-16 10:25:26

annsixty hope you feel better soon flowers

Yes, looking back on the years since I was 56 I can't believe how much has happened and how much we have cried, survived and enjoyed - and welcomed (and love) the new people into our family, adults and babies.