My heart is breaking for my child.

That is so sad KateK. for her and for you.

A young friend of ours has been through sueing a hospital for negligence, in her case not a bereavement but for negligence in the treatment she herself received, which has sadly deprived them of things they as a family had very much hoped for. It is not an easy process.

Perhaps I shouldn't mention money here, but I do hope your daughter receives what is due to her to safeguard her own child's future. Please ignore this part of my post if you find it upsetting.

I just want to add my sympathies for what you, your Dd and DGD are going through. To feel the pain 3 times over, as. MIL, DM, and gran is indeed a dreadful thing for you. No words can comfort adequately, no take away the pain but I wish you all the strength you need to support each other. Can't think of any words which come close.

Katek, it's all been said above but sending you big (((hugs)) for you and for your daughter and your DGD. You know we are here if you need us.

Oh, Katek How sad for you all.

Big though she is, your DD still needs your hugs, even though she knows as an adult that it will not take all the pain away.

The sense of a waste of a life must be very raw indeed for you all now - but her investigations may save some other family from going through this terrible ordeal, as hopefully lessons will be learned. Your DD has done the right thing, tough though it is.

Thinking of you all

Oh you poor, poor daughter Katek. Having her "uneasy thoughts" confirmed must feel like she is re-living her tragic loss all over again. I understand what you mean when you say that you almost wish she hadn't started the process of getting to the truth but I think deep down you know that she would not rest until this happened. Sadly these situations (such as her DD singing in the panto) will crop up often for many years to come each time she remembers that her DH is not there to share "the moment" with her. She will feel cheated. I am speaking from experience when I say that time really is a great healer and things will get easier for her. Eventually she will be able to remember him and smile.

I know what you mean when you say you wish she was little again and you could just hug her better. Thinking of you, your DD and DGD.

Katek that is so desperately sad - to be widowed so young is bad enough but to find out that it was all so unnecessary.... well words fail me. I totally understand you sometimes wishing she hadn't initiated the inquiry, but I guess you'll never know how she would have coped with life forever wondering why. At least she knows now, harsh as it must be to have to confront such an agonising truth. And it is right that people are held to account for these wrongs, so that there is at least some hope that the reasons for the errors may be addressed and future patients will be at less risk.
for you and for her. What a terrible time you must all be going through.

My heart goes out to all of you; it's so devastating I really don't know the words to say.
I do however think it's very important to know the truth, to remove if you like the 'what if', as bleak as that might be.
It won't make thinks better but it might eventually give her a little sense of closure (if that's the right word, I'm not sure it is).

Very big hugs to you Katek, she's very lucky to have you x