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Sharing Nanna's bed.

(27 Posts)
Katek Sat 21-Feb-15 18:24:36

My 8yr old DGS loves to sleep in our bed when he comes to stay. DH often removes himself to the spare room so he doesn't have to hang on to the edge of the mattress! My gs has done this since he was small and we have some of our best chats in the early morning. Nobody in the family - including his parents - has any issue with this as we believe he will gradually stop wanting to do it as he gets older. Currently he still has an assortment of soft toys in the bed as well so he's not as grown up as all that. I think it's lovely to have a sleeping child next to you, gives me a happy heart. My friend, however, is quite emphatic in saying that we shouldn't let him do this and shouid make him sleep in his own bed. My friend is a gay male and I'm not sure if this has any bearing on his position. Just wondered what other Gnetters thought??

jinglbellsfrocks Sat 21-Feb-15 18:34:27

You lucky thing!!! How the hell did you manage that? No way would either of my two get in bed with me. Younger one is always up and watching telly at crack of dawn anyway. Older one has reached teen-hood, so sleeps in late these days. envy

jinglbellsfrocks Sat 21-Feb-15 18:35:33

nothing wrong with it btw. As if! hmm

Jane10 Sat 21-Feb-15 18:35:59

Its hard to say. My DGS also sleeps with me when he stays. He's 3. Mind you he's always running through to his parents bed at home anyway. It almost feels like a small animal thing. I love it too though. I woke up one morning and he was holding my hand. Happy heart alright!

annodomini Sat 21-Feb-15 19:08:48

I'm sure he will impose a cut-off point of his own volition so there's no need to listen to anything but your own instincts. Unless he's still doing it when he reaches puberty!

loopylou Sat 21-Feb-15 19:20:16

I think that's lovely!
Presumably he sleeps in his own bed at home, so enjoy it while it lasts and be thankful it's soft toys and not Lego, trucks or diggers!

Penstemmon Sat 21-Feb-15 19:25:41

Our lot often share the bed with us! age range 2+ to 9+!

Mishap Sat 21-Feb-15 19:30:12

I would tell this so-called friend to mind his own business - I've never heard anything so ridiculous! It's his problem not yours!

Enjoy, enjoy! Our little ones of various ages often sleep with us when they are here. GS of 6 will be with us tonight - on the floor by our bed to start with, but he usually migrates! And from about 6 am onwards, no doubt his 3 year old brother will snuggle in too.

It is, as you say, a happy thing to have a sleeping child next to you. And it is normal happy family life.

Let your friend keep his thoughts to himself; and you carry on just as you are.

Deedaa Sat 21-Feb-15 20:34:28

When GS2 was born GS1 had to spend the night with us. He was 6 at the time and I had him in bed with me because I didn't trust him in a room on his own. I think we both enjoyed it.

How would your friend feel about me sharing a bed with my grown upson when we were both stranded in the snow?

Greenfinch Sat 21-Feb-15 20:55:55

My DGS ,aged 7, always joins us at about 3am when he is staying with us. We love it and so does he His twin sister, on the other hand, sleeps like a log and wouldn't dream of coming into our bed.
I can remember getting into bed with my parents occasionally until I was about 12 and feeling very safe and happy between them.
There is nothing wrong with it at all. Enjoy it while it lasts.

Mishap Sat 21-Feb-15 21:01:12

What would he say about me sharing a cross-channel ferry cabin with my son-in-law!? Both he and I (out of a big family party) were knackered after a long drive, so he hired cabin and off we went! He behaved like a real gentleman - how boring!

Greyduster Sat 21-Feb-15 21:06:31

Our GS, just 8, has always come in to our bed in the morning when he stays (he often used to elbow one or other of us out in the middle of the night but he's grown out of that now). He is always accompanied by a variety of "friends" of various shapes and sizes. We then have a hot drink and a biscuit and watch CBBC for half an hour or so. Then it usually ends up in a pillow fight or duvet monsters with grandad. He loves it. Like most children his age, he can veer from being quite sophisticated to very silly in a hairbreadth. He'll give it up when he's ready and we have no intention of discouraging him while ever he's comfortable with it. I'm clinging on to all these little rituals like a drowning man, because our little ones grow up so quickly. Make the most of it, Katek!

felice Sat 21-Feb-15 21:27:52

DGS woke me up last Saturday morning with his face about 4cms from mine saying hiya Grandma, Shoosies(slippers) waving my slippers around. He had for the first time climbed out of the deep travel cot he sleeps in, in my bedroom.
Unfortunately I could not persuade him to come under the duvet for a cuddle.
I was waiting to see what would happen this morning, but he just said 'you up' brought me my dressing gown and slippers and went to raid the fridge. He is just 3.
I am so jealous, would love a morning cuddle.

rosesarered Sat 21-Feb-15 21:48:05

My DGS sleeps in our king size bed with me, grandad is relegated to the guest room!He only sleeps overnight about once a month, and I suppose he will have to sleep in the other room at some point(he is 10)but as he is autistic he is about 2/3 years behind that age emotionally, so that won't happen for a while.I read him a long bedtime story, he always has warm milk and toast or a biscuit, then he asks for some songs and nursery rhymes.
up to last year he used to want to cuddle very closely, now he doesn't,which is a relief as he was like a big hot water bottle!He always used to have his favourite soft toy with him in the bed too, but he has just rejected that lately so I suppose he is slowly growing up.It IS lovely to have a child share the bed and anyone who says it is wrong is an idiot.

Lona Sat 21-Feb-15 22:07:07

My three yr old dgd has started coming into my bed, she doesn't even shout to ask now. Last night was like a war zone as she has chicken pox.
She thrashed around all night, hit me in the head several times ,poked me in the eye and generally gave me a good kicking!
I loved every painful, sleepless minute! grin

Katek Sat 21-Feb-15 22:34:20

Thanks all you lovely grans! It's such a special time when they're small and i think that children have snuggled up with parents/grandparents since time immemorial. As Mishap says it's my friend with the problem and not me. I had an hour of football tuition from DGS before we got up this morning-I'm becoming quite knowledgeable!

Oh and DGD won't come anywhere near the bed because apparently I breathe too loudly!!

jinglbellsfrocks Sat 21-Feb-15 22:36:12

Mishap grin I love it!

Anya Sat 21-Feb-15 22:36:38

KateK you GS sounds just like mine, same age, same temperament. He's very sweet and loving and often climbs into my bed at night if he wakes up in the wee small hours. It's not a problem..

Elizabeth1 Sun 22-Feb-15 03:11:35

My DGS loves sleeping in my bed - long may it continue. However when the dog's on my bed as well its just too much. OUT Grandad wink

rubylady Sun 22-Feb-15 05:37:07

These stories are so heart warming, you are all so very lucky.

My DS refused point blank on his first night on earth to sleep in the perspex cot on the maternity ward and so started "velcro baby". He slept in with me in my bed until he was gone four years old and as tiring as it was I wouldn't have it any other way.

I do think there are reasons for it though. I instantly bonded with my DD at birth and she went into her carrycot/pram no problem. But, I had pulmonary oedema with my son and was in and out of hospital for a while. I also had post natal depression with him and so I do think him sleeping in with me bonded us and without it I don't think our relationship would be as strong as what it is or has been.

Long may you all continue to have "cuddle time" as I put it when mine were smaller. Now I have it with my doggie in a morning. Although my 6ft 3in son did climb onto my bed last night and needed some mummy cuddles. No matter what age we all are, we all need affection and reassurance from time to time. smile

kittylester Sun 22-Feb-15 07:28:57

I think I've mentioned before that DD2 worked as an overnight shelf stacked in the holidays while she was a student and regularly came and got into our bed [between us] when she got home from work!

nannieroz111 Sun 22-Feb-15 07:43:35

I cherish the memories of GS1 sharing our bed on sleepovers. Singing nursery rhymes and reading bedtime stories with all the sound effects from grandad. Oh happy days!

grannyactivist Sun 22-Feb-15 14:46:57

My grandsons (5&2) have always climbed into bed with me in the mornings, but children and grandchildren have usually only slept through the night with me if they were ill. When my son had a studio flat at college he had only a double bed so a couple of times we shared it, until he decided he would actually get a better night's sleep on the floor. grin

Katek Sun 22-Feb-15 16:20:49

At least you got the the bed! grin

campodol Sun 22-Feb-15 20:00:44

You enjoy it Katek for as long as you can ,these are memories you are making for him , ours doesnt sleep with us when they are staying but cant get in fast enough in the morning and we all cuddle up snug as bugs in rugs