The things they say.

I remember when my infant son once managed to knock over the nappy bucket (remember them???), in the lounge of all places. It's amazing how far a bucket of (dirty) water can go, even when it has a carpet to sink into!

DH's six-year old son, who was stopping with us for a few days at the time walked in and innocently asked, "has he spilt his drink?"

At the time I was too flustered to find the question amusing.

Where do they get it from indeed! DGS, when told to do something by DD1 bowed, took her hand, kissed it and said "yes, your Majesty"

And when I asked him to pick up one toy from the garden before the lawns were cut, he ran outside and sat with his head in his hands for about 20 minutes! DD1 asked what I had said to upset him.

They are so funny, aren't they?

Sometimes it's not even the words, but they way that the deliver them that makes it amusing, isn't it?.
Apparently, DGS (age two and a half, and not a particularly advanced talker) looked at his daddy the other morning and said, "Like the jumper, Daddy". Not funny on the face of it, but said with such adult intonation that it sounded hilarious!

Had lunch in a cafe with DD and DGC one a 3 year old boy. DD went off to the loo, she was a while and when she came back DGS squeaked loudly 'You a long time mummy, you do poo poo?' Quietly she answered 'No darling I just did a wee' DGS Loudly again 'But did you 'member to hold your willy down mummy' DD quietly again 'mummy doesn't have a willy' DGS 'But, but, but where do your wee wee come from then mummy?'

Thank goodness my DD is a calm and collected mother.

DGD aged 5,-"Anna (baby sister) was sick in the car yesterday,Daddy says she has travel sickness."
DGS aged 7-"But she was sick in her cot last night,she must be homesick."

DGD1, age 4, sitting on the loo carefully examining the toilet roll then said "did you bring this toilet paper back with you from Australia Granny?" "No, why?"
"Well it's got koalas all over it!"

And so it had!

First trip to the dentist for 2 year old grandaughters this afternoon. It went quite well, apart from the attempt to clamp the dentist's fingers firmly between second twin's teeth. After giving advice about sugary snacks and drinks, and being firmly assured that our precious toddlers rarely have sweet things, first twin piped up 'bic-bic peez, mummy!' then blew her top when mummy said 'no, but you can have an apple when we get home.' She could be heard kicking off all the way back to the car. I laughed like a drain!

I was at a swimming pool with DD then three, while DS was having a swimming lesson.
I gave DD a snack after which she wanted to wash her sticky hands.

I suggested that she could go and wash her hands in the (nearby) toilet.
DD trots back in a minute "Mummy I couldn't wash my hands because their was a poo in there."

These are making me laugh so much

Last week, when DS got home from work he asked 2.6 year old DGS if he had had a nice day, and been a good boy.
DGS hung his head, shook his head and said in a very sad voice, "No addy. I been bad boy. I been messing bout. Mummy not appy."

Apparently, not a word of it was true - he had been a little angel!!!

So funny, have to be written down because you may forget them later!

Although I always remember this one:

Me to DH age 3 "shall we sell the carrycot, or shall we have another baby?"
Then we noticed DD1 sobbing silently with tears rolling down her face. "Whatever's the matter" I asked
"I don't want another baby, I like the one we've got"
(DS age 6 months)

Watching wildlife film about turtles on the Great Barrier Reef with 3 year old DGS.

DGS: That turtle must be tired Ganma after laying all those eggs.

Me: Yes, she must be

DGS: And thirsty too, she must be very very thirsty Ganma.

Me: She certainly looks thirsty.

DGS: But Ganma, if she drink all the water in the sea there won't be
any water left for the turtles to swim in.

Logic of a three year old.

DS is an archaeologist, DDiL a museum curator.

One day last week when DS was explaining something about the past to DGD (aged 6) she turned to him and said 'When history is so interesting why do you make it so boring?'

Collapse of stout party (as they say) - in laughter.

Some friends of mine are called Bill and Hilary. When my little grand-daughter was three years old she got their names mixed up and referred to them one day as "Bilary". This stuck and everyone has called them that ever since.
And all woodpigeons are known as Trevor, ever since the same grand-daughter was asked if she knew what that bird in the garden was called. She thought long and hard about this (you could almost hear her brain cogs whirling!) and she suddenly blurted out "Trevor".

In our house we have stiffy tockee pudding...

This is an amazing thread, haven't laughed so much in ages - not since Thought for the Day'. Mind you Freda from now on it will be 'Stiffy Tocky pudding'

When my grandson was about three and a half, he was going through a stage of not saying thank you or please. I said to him 'it would be nice if you said please'. He turned to me and said very firmly ' I haven't got any pleases left - I've used them all up. I MIGHT have a thank you.'
Next morning he did say please and I congratulated him, only to be told - again very firmly 'That's the only one'.

Freda - in our house it is called stiffy cocky pudding!!

!!!

One of my four year old pupils said that he had sparkles in his arm - pins and needles!

For the last thirty years we have been ladling our soup out with a 'soup manager'.

Ruby ???
Don"t get it !!

Our pasta server is known as the "camel castrator."

DS1 was cuddling one of our cats when he (DS) was small and suddenly looked up in amazement and said "Mummy, he's got music in his fur!"

My 2 1/2 year old granddaughter was watching an animal programme about deer. 'My nannies a deer' she told her mum, ' because grandad says ' yes dear, ok dear!'