Suspected autism in 12 year old granddaughter.

Who suspects autism? It sounds like a stroppy teenager to me.

Her Mum needs to push for a diagnosis. It may be autism, it may be something else or it may be she is just badly behaved.
A Psychologist will assess her.

My niece got so fed up waiting that she paid privately for an assessment for her son. He is 12 now. It cost about £1,000 so they just put off updating their car for a year.

Yes, definitely stroppy teenager behaviour, I should know, I was one!

Good luck to your daughter……

This could be one of many neuro divergent conditions, or could just be behavioural. Would get a private assessment if possible with a child psychologist. I believe costs vary but would be in the ballpark of £1,500-£2,500. What do the school say and do they have a SENCO (Special Educational Needs Co-Ordinator)

There is far more to autism than being defiant.

Is there someone in the school responsible for pastoral care?

Is her being against school rules the only part of her behaviour which makes you/her parents think she may be autistic?

Is this a new trait? If so it could be hormonal changes that she is struggling with.

If her behaviour has always been a problem then it could be something other than a young teenager kicking against boundaries.ODD for one thing, that’s oppositional defiance disorder.It isn’t just bad behaviour.

Have a look at ODD Trisher123 if you haven’t already . Wishing your family all the best as it’s not an easy situation.

Sorry, crossed post with Oreo.

It sounds very much like my grandson.

As far as I know, he is just a pain in the arse teen.

Always late for school, walks out if he decides he will/won't do as is asked of him.

Him and almost all the teens at his school, from what I can gather

Sounds like a stroppy teenager to me too, our granddaughter is autistic and my daughter a SENCO.
In an odd way, if our granddaughter was naughty, it would be a relief.

JaxJacky yes I understand, the family would much prefer our darling GS to be naughty, autism is not an easy thing to negotiate the world with.

Sounds like normal 12 year old behaviour.

It does seem now that any negative behaviour requires a label that really makes no difference to who the person is anyway.

I wouldn't slap a label on her without findng out more and without a formal diagnosis.

Is she unhappy at school? Starting a new school at 12 can be daunting, especially if others have made their friendship groups. It sounds as if she isn't at a school near home so may not know anyone in the catchment area either.

has to catch the bus at 7.20 in the morning, and my daughter has had so many problems getting her up. Yesterday I had to pick her up from the school as she had decided she was too hot, and didn't want to wear the school blazer, so just walked out. (scream I know).
That's quite an early start. Does she travel with other children or is she on her own?
I'm surprised she could just walk out of school too.

Your DD needs to go in to have a chat with the HT or Head of Year and find out what pastoral care is available. Is her father in the picture at all?

They can be PITAs, I know, but I feel sorry for her, she sounds as if she's struggling.

Maybe she is an amazingly sensible child! This rubbish about wearing hot uniform on a hot day……makes me cross and I’m not involved!

My friends well brought up grandchild sounds exactly like that even called the teacher a cow it would never have happened in my school days or even my children’s school days
So what’s different children believing they are the boss with no repercussions for stroppiness

midgey

Maybe she is an amazingly sensible child! This rubbish about wearing hot uniform on a hot day……makes me cross and I’m not involved!

I think a lot of the pupils at one of my DGC's schools rebelled because they were told to wear their blazers all day during a hot summer.
So they refused. Good for them!

Some rules are meant to be broken.

Yesterday I had to pick her up from the school as she had decided she was too hot, and didn't want to wear the school blazer, so just walked out. (scream I know).

I'd have told her I wasn't taking her home, she had to go back into school.

The school policy about blazer wearing needs to be addressed.
My school over 60 years ago was strict about uniform but the rules were not nonsensical. No-one wore blazers indoors, unless it was very cold.

It's not exactly boiling weather now, though.

I have worked with Autistic children and had training to recognise the behaviours.
This behaviour does not point towards Autism.
Everyone now seems to want to be able to label their child,children and young people are sometimes just badly behaved.

MissAdventure

It's not exactly boiling weather now, though.

Apparently it was quite hot the other days in some parts of the country 🌞

But certainly not here!

Quite hot isn't hot enough.
Hence, I'm not a teacher.

Would the school have had more idea if the little girl is showing traits of autism?
Surely they would say, wouldn't they?

It's all so complex these days.

She sounds unhappy to me and desperately attention-seeking.

What else is going on in her life?

Hang in there. We have been through far worse with my granddaughter. She was finally expelled.
Fortunately the deputy head knew she had a marvellous brain.
He spoke up for her at a school that is in the top 3 in our county because he knew they would know how to handle her.
Next week she is going to Lambeth Palace at the invite of The Archbishop of Canterbury.
She won a competition at school and it went from there.

Well done to your granddaughter, petra

It just takes someone who can think outside the box, who realises that children are individuals and do not all come out of the same mould. Well done to that Deputy Head for recognising that.