Surprise Phone Call

Nice one Bekind

Got my phone call last night. Thanks to all your good advice, it went well. I concentrated on her well-being after the operation, told her she was gorgeous before and would be after, and that I was happy for her. She sounded pleased and relieved and I hope it makes our relationship closer.

You say they are coming over at the weekend Bekind?

Don't serve melon as a starter.

Yes you are right bekind and annep, but it is similar to getting your teeth done, or having a facelift, or Botox, in that it is changing one’s appearance and the image one presents to the world.

Some people affect to not care what they look like or what they wear, but that in itself is making a statement.

So undertaking a fairly drastic, expensive, time consuming, and possibly irreversible change to one’s appearance implies a certain underlying insecurity and anxiety, and any comments should be supportive and helpful and not derisive.

I think it's a little different because it is major surgery! Always a risk.

Maybe she didn't want people squinting at her, wondering if she'd had an op or just got a padded bra?

I don't think it's the same as a new hairstyle.

Very good advice from everyone, and a little levity! I'll let you all know how it goes!

Perhaps she rang you because if she didn't tell you, you might not notice, beyond a vague feeling she looked slightly different. Imagine spending all that money and then no-one noticing

When you say “seeing them” on Saturday is that the couple or the new boobies? Wouldn’t like to be shown.

well, a whole new lot of bras at least!

Perhaps she has had self-esteem issues and this may boost her self-confidence.
Unless she ends up looking enormous a la Jordan, just say 'that looks really good, dear'.

It’s essentially no different from having something done to your teeth or having a new hair colour or style.
I would just ask if she’s pleased with the outcome.
If she is, I’d say ‘great!’ in an enthusiastic tone.
If she says no, then I’d say something reassuring like ‘I expect the change will take a bit of getting used to.’
Supplementary questions could be along the lines of ‘have you been in much discomfort?’ ‘How did they decide what size to give you?’

What I would want to know is whether the procedure necessitates buying a whole new wardrobe full of tops, but I’m not sure I’d actually ask that

It is good you are forewarned of the call. Avoid saying anything disapproving at all. Good luck. I can imagine it would be difficult having any conversation with your son about it.

Maybe she's had issues with small breasts .I have aclose friend who always says she has never felt"womanly" because she was an A cup ,I on the other hand was a double d and desperate to be smaller .Thankfully I lost weight and went down to a c/d cup .Just tell her you hope it does what she hopes it will .Its not the big deal it used to be

I REALLY feel awkward talking to my son about it! I'll be seeing them on Saturday since I'm babysitting for them. They are going to a company party. Guess it will be the big reveal!

If she's your DiL, she must be married to your son. I would be wondering what he thinks.

Oh dear there is no set response to a statement like that is there. Could be a very patronising " that's nice dear" as Buffybee said.
Can't get the image of Jordan out of my head now

Buy her a card, saying 'Its twins!'

She might be fore warning you Bekind for when you next see her, with huge boobs, like Jordan!
When she rings say, "That's nice dear".
Ha! Only joking!

That is really funny! Makes me relax!

I know, right? Awkward!

Try not to laugh.
I'm sorry. I can't think how I would respond. other than "Oh. right. ok"

Oh! Well I suppose general hope you are feeling ok and pleased with the outcome. Agree with others that you make no comment other than that!

Be careful when wearing a brooch.

If that is what she wants and they make her happy, be happy for her. Ask if there is anything she needs as she will be limited in what she is able to do for 4-6 weeks. Hopefully she will appreciate your support.