Excluded from holiday planing

Mine would be quite happy to 'stay in the garden'.

Maybe he thought he was doing a good thing-a surprise? Have you moaned he never plans or does anything himself in past/ leaves everything to you? If its really not something youl like tackle him while theres still a 'cooling off' period& choose something youl both like.together.At least hes done something,not just forgotten.

Gosh, it would be nice to be a trophy wife. After 34 years!

Have you asked him about the holiday and his reasons for not consulting you? Is it supposed to be an anniversary surprise?

I’ve been our ‘travel architect’ ( I swear I didn’t make up this expression! I’ve been hoping for a chance to use it ) for so long I’m not sure I could cope with anyone organising anything other than a weekend away for me.

Lucky you, most husbands just wouldn't bother for a 34th. Are you so beautiful that you consider yourself a "trophy"
that all men would like to win?

He'll have to tell you where it is if you need a visa, innoculations, etc.!

I don't quite understand what the problem is? Do you usually plan holidays together, and is this why you are upset?

Or is this holiday meant to be a present to you from your DH for your wedding anniversary?

If it was meant as a present or a surprise, please accept it gracefully. Unless of course you really cannot afford the holiday he has planned.

But you say you feel like a trophy wife, if you go along with this, so presumably you both usually plan holidays.

Gosh. I would love my husband to plan and book a holiday for us both. We do discuss where we want to go, but then I have to do all the research, booking, etc. So long as Its somewhere you are happy to go, let him have free rein. Many ladies complain their DHs don't even remember their anniversary. I know which I'd prefer.

Ah, it must be my OH who's the trophy person. I've never known him actually bestir himself to arrange anything.

Oh, wait, he did once have a chat with the male half of a couple we were friends with, and arranged a get together for dinner one evening. When the time came, neither knew where we were all supposed to meet..... They hadn't discussed that, had they?

I’d be delighted if that had happened to me, I feel you should give him a break and revel in it.Tons of us would love to be in your shoes. Sit back let go and enjoy.

The message that shines through this thread is that She want to go away, He isn't bothered. Don't you trust your relationship enough to go with a girlfriend?

My DH often books surprise holidays and weekends away. Go with the flow. He's trying to do something nice for you.

Wombat ??

We always discuss where to go on holiday but after 50 years I’d love it if my husband booked a surprise. He did it once many years ago and it was magical

I would be pleased, by now you obviously both have certain ideas of how you like to holiday. I personally, would not go camping as I like to be looked after, if he had booked that I would not go, because he should have known it, otherwise I would be excited. I am sure you are not a Trophy wife, oh to be a trophy of anything ,he needn't have done anything. Just enjoy it.

My husband does nothing. He moans about holidays, but has never helped when I've booked them. We have had to present documents as ID as we are moving - we had a problem finding anything with his name & address as he pays no bills! He's only just started sorting & packing - I've done it all. Happily, my daughter and her family live next door, are also selling up and have helped me so much.

Anyone want a secondhand husband??

We got together because when he was just my boyfriend he invited me to join him on holiday to foreign lands. I was a bit apprehensive about getting the jabs tbh. The following year he organised a trip travelling around Indochina. They were the best holidays. Later we went to other far flung places and I was involved in the planning but the very first holiday was magical. We were even upgraded to a huge suite in a luxury 5 star resort hotel at our first stopover in Borneo.
I knew then he was a keeper!

Over 50 years and he has never ever, even nice, booked anything. I even do the packing, airport parking if needed, used to cancel the milk, the whole lot. all he does is turn up!
My daughter said at least I get to choose where we go but oh wouldn’t it be nice to have a surprise, or at least a bit of interest on his part, even if he only pretends. Thing us he always enjoys it. Grrr I am glad it’s not just me.

Even once

I don't understand the trophy wife part at all. He has booked a holiday for your anniversary without consulting you so unless it is something awful what's the problem? You never know it might be the best holiday ever.
My DH booked a holiday in Malta one November for us, DS and DM who was almost 90. It was great except we flew out of Gatwick and left the car there but the flight home was to Stansted arriving at 11pm on a icy foggy night. Which we difmt kniw until we got tp the airport to fly home. DB was not best pleased to drive to the airport to pick us up in that weather. So since then it has been down to me to book holidays.

I had a lovely surprise last year while I was staying with my daughter. I had a text message from DH asking if I fancied a cruise for my birthday. I was gobsmacked, and in the time it took to reply, he sent another text saying - "too late - it's booked."

I usually do all the booking and arrangements, and it was lovely to be surprised like that. It was a wonderful holiday!

I'm still a little puzzled by the OP, as the "trophy wife" hasn't been explained. Perhaps we'd have a better idea of the problem if there was more explanation?

We decide together where we want to go. If he or me is mad keen and the other other doesn't want to go then we have have often had holidays in different countries. He would go to Iceland, walking, and I would go to Turkey. I don't think I would like a holiday booked without some input.

I would LOVE my husband to plan a holiday for me. If left to him we’d spend a lot of time talking about it and then stay at home. Have a wonderful holiday.

I'm with the lady who said if her husband booked a holiday she would drop down dead.

That would be me and her, side by side, dead.

Actually, it'd be me and you and her, Lilylaundry, side by side, dead.