Adult Grandson wants to move in..advice plez

What are the circumstances for him wanting to move back in? If he is able to financially support his own living accommodation I don't think it is unreasonable to say no because my health needs have become more serious since you last lived here and I need more privacy

That’s such a hard one. I have a 22 year old grandson, who I adore, but I don’t think I could have him staying with me 24/7. Sometimes, I think, honesty is the best policy. Just tell him about your health issues, and explain that you are now older than when he last stayed with you.
I was just wondering, is your house big enough that he could have his own little bed sit ?
Try not to ruin the close relationship you have. I hope you will find an amicable solution ..

If you're close you can tell him the truth but that also probably means that he already knows about your health issues.. maybe he wants to help.. talk to him

Agree, talk to him. Understand why he wants to come back, it could be so he can support you. As you have a good relationship a gentle chat shouldn’t cause any tension. Good luck.

It's a difficult situation. You don't want to hurt your grandson's feelings, but you are not able to cope now that you have health issues. I think I may be in the same boat one day in the future. My own grandson has often hinted at moving in with my husband and I, but neither of us is in the best of health, and being in his early 20s, I feel his energy would be too much for us. Also, my husband and I need to follow a strict diet, which would not be at all appetising to a youngster - and I no longer have the energy to be making two different dinners a night.

It all depends why he wants to move in with you, what will happen to him if he can’t?
Does he have a job to go to, will he chip in to help with all the food bills?
Does he have any mental health probs?
Tell him you would like to have a trial period of six months to see if it works for you all? Tell him he has to help out in the home as you have health probs and aren’t as young as you were? Ask him if he will help with garden work?

no, that won't do, however much he might contribute to bills or with tasks.
esp a young man cannot envisage the difficulties that come with age.
as well as ill health.
you need to be able to relax, totally, in your own home.
and you need your privacy.

I d find it too hard to say no
but I agree what are the reasons behind it why does he want to move in ? Perhaps he only wants a bed and an address for a short period ?

My son asked if he could move back home for 3 months when he finished university. He said he would do his own washing and ironing and cook his own meals, and I said that was fine.

However, he was actually here for 9 months before he found a flat share, and although he was no trouble with looking after himself, he would obviously stay out late with his friends on many evenings and weekends, and I would automatically find myself waking up, noticing the landing light was still on and wondering if he was ok. I would tell myself that while he was at university I had had no idea what he was doing, but once he was back home I reverted to a worried mother.

And sometimes he would creep in very late and I would suddenly wake up with a jump to unexpected noises before remembering that I was no longer living alone. I have a number of health problems which give me sleep problems, so to have broken nights was difficult.

I hardly saw anything of him socially so I didn't have the benefit of his company, and although I was glad to help him out, I confess I was relieved when he had found somewhere else to live.

I’m afraid I couldn’t refuse. Hopefully we could sort any problems as they arise

Merylstreep me too

I think it depends why, what the other options are and what it is that makes the OP's illness so difficult now.

I do think that younger people often fail to understand that as we get older we often have health issues .
I know that I did .
I used to find my parents boring at times , because they complained about being tired !
Having written that I think that my poor Grandma was their skivvy .
It didn't occur to me to refuse any requests and I did things without being asked :
Shopping (heavy) , dusting , vacuuming , helping in the kitchen , laying the table , washing up and mowing the lawn .
And I wasn't a teenager .

If your grandson is expecting to have his room cleaned , his laundry done and his meals cooked and manipulates the TV - it is totally unacceptable .

I suggest that you have a serious discussion with him and perhaps , a realistic trial period .

no. it just won't work for the grandees.
they need their own space, to themselves.

I don’t think there has been mention of what other family members think
Perhaps they have put forward the proposition that your grandson could offer a little support Perhaps asking if he can move in is his way of not making it look as if he thinks you need it.

I'd love my grandson to move in here with me, but even though I say that I can forsee some difficulties. I need my quiet space now.
Hopefully he will understand about your health problems and will remain close to you. Good luck

I would not refuse, but you have your reasons. Be kind but honest with him and give him a reason why.

He may be of great help to you?

Come back TurquoiseFeather please we are wondering about options/reasons.

annoying when OP doesn't respond.