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"the sensible one" ( friendship)

(22 Posts)
greyfur16 Thu 27-Aug-26 10:46:26

I know a couple of very long standing female friends who I have long regarded as sensible.

I see their lives more clearly and they are making decisions which seem for from sensible.Pinging about from one thing to the next.
Perhaps I am sensible after all?
However, the world has gone mad for sure.

NotSpaghetti Thu 27-Aug-26 10:55:56

What are they pinging about to/from?

greyfur16 Thu 27-Aug-26 11:03:03

It's a rather incoherent post from me. I suppose it's that swan gliding with the duck feet underneath. What they put out is not the reality.

NotSpaghetti Thu 27-Aug-26 11:05:35

Are they maybe needing some (gentle) support?

Namsnanny Thu 27-Aug-26 11:17:14

Financial decisions, moral decisions, practical decisions, decisions that impact others negatively?
I suppose it all depends on what the parameters are to 'being sensible'?

paddyann54 Thu 27-Aug-26 11:30:43

Nobody wants to be sensible all the time surely?
I think we all do things that others see as being impractical,financially reckless or just plain bonkers.
I am one of the people who does all of the above….if it makes me happy and doesn,t impact on any one els,s life then why not?
Must be very boring being Sane and sensible all the time.
Or even some of it where I,m concerned.

Georgesgran Thu 27-Aug-26 11:31:52

Maybe they’ve decided that life is too short to always take the sensible option? I’ve travelled more in the past 5 years than I did in the previous 70! I’m also finding friends spending savings, saying they can’t take it with them.

paddyann54 Thu 27-Aug-26 11:32:15

Sorry posted too soon,
Even if you wouldn,t behave the same way it’s not your right to judge

greyfur16 Thu 27-Aug-26 11:41:41

This is not coming over well.....I don't want to gossip about people on line but I'm not really making sense.

Friend One has always put out the vibe that she is a coper and will deal pleasantly with whatever comes her way, admirable.It's not authentic though because there is so much backstory and on going stress/ uncertainty

Friend Two similar, maintains all is well, even when faced with things which would floor most people.

greyfur16 Thu 27-Aug-26 11:42:16

typo ( not authentic)

petra Thu 27-Aug-26 11:42:24

greyfur16

It's a rather incoherent post from me. I suppose it's that swan gliding with the duck feet underneath. What they put out is not the reality.

It might not be your idea of reality, but it’s theirs.
Could you give an idea of what you regard as sensible?

greyfur16 Thu 27-Aug-26 11:56:01

I am trying to say the "picture" I have formed of people maybe 30 years ago is not todays reality.

I think it is sensible to value yourself, to pace yourself , to attend to your health, to remain active and interested.

tabbie Thu 27-Aug-26 12:38:15

Things evolve. Life changes prople.
I don't understand why it matters to you?

NotSpaghetti Thu 27-Aug-26 13:46:49

Maybe they aren't the people that the OP thought she knew.
That might matter...

petra Thu 27-Aug-26 14:00:07

greyfur16

I am trying to say the "picture" I have formed of people maybe 30 years ago is not todays reality.

I think it is sensible to value yourself, to pace yourself , to attend to your health, to remain active and interested.

Are you referring to your friends or people in general?

Is your second sentence related to your OP.?

AGAA4 Thu 27-Aug-26 14:08:53

Some people can seem to act without sense to others.
A friend spent all her savings on exotic holidays another moved on her own to another part of the country after living in the same house for forty years.
If things make sense to them then that's all that matters.

MT62 Thu 27-Aug-26 14:17:34

greyfur16

I know a couple of very long standing female friends who I have long regarded as sensible.

I see their lives more clearly and they are making decisions which seem for from sensible.Pinging about from one thing to the next.
Perhaps I am sensible after all?
However, the world has gone mad for sure.

Gone mad? Why are you only realising now that it’s completely mad!

butterandjam Thu 27-Aug-26 14:17:54

Older people often enjoy a freedom to ping around that was denied earlier when they had to work, be financially prudent, support children or elderly parents

They may have retired on a pension, mortgage paid; their parents have died and their children are independent and self-supporting .

No job, no debts, no responsibilities; a steady income.

Time to cut loose and do what the hell you like.

greyfur16 Thu 27-Aug-26 14:18:20

I feel like I have made myself a bit vulnerable with this post.

Yes, the second sentence is related to the OP.

Just as we assign roles within families, perhaps some of us do it with friends.....think Sex in the City or (indeed!) Friends. The cookie one, the ambitious one, the accident prone one and so on.

Things have evolved and we are all very different people from 30 odd years ago.

Fallingstar Thu 27-Aug-26 14:25:44

I think it is the way you put it in your OP greyfur16, you were not clear and then everyone jumped on board.
You can remove a post if you want to though am not entirely sure how, and maybe start again - if you really want to.

NotSpaghetti Thu 27-Aug-26 15:18:14

greyfur16 that makes total sense now.

How true.
I am a probably seen as a shadow of my former self!

greyfur16 Thu 27-Aug-26 15:32:52

Fallingstar

I think it is the way you put it in your OP greyfur16, you were not clear and then everyone jumped on board.
You can remove a post if you want to though am not entirely sure how, and maybe start again - if you really want to.

No problem, Thanks anyway.