Birthday & Christmas Presents and Cards

I think you need to draw the line a bit otherwise it's going to become extremely expensive. As your grandchildren are now grown up, perhaps sending them a nice card would be sufficient.

I would give the grandchildren a card and the great grandchildren a small present.

I have great grandchildren and buy them a present I stop buying the for the Grandchildren when they either start work or reach 18 . It works for us.

My Mum experienced this problem some years ago and she solved it by buying for grandchildren as normal but buying great grand children a large tube of sweets each for about £1 and a nice card. They all seemed happy with this.

Depends on how many DC/DGC/DGGC you have. If it is 1,1,1, then buy them all presents. If it is 5, 15, 25, just send all of them cards.

With us it is simple. 2,2,0 and the 0 is unlikely to change for at least another 20 years, so they all get presents.

I think I would be inclined to buy for the family/ies rather than the individuals. Say a family game, a bottle of bubbly and a tin of sweets - age appropriate of course.

We have a cut off age of 18, birthday and Christmas presents stop. So if I had contact with my lot the youngest granddaughter and the great grandson would be the only ones to get presents. It is difficult to start with but you have to think that the older ones have had their 18 years worth while younger ones haven't.

Just the GGC for me as it can get really out of hand financially with birthdays as well.

My parents have 13 grand children and 13 great grandchildren. That is a lot to buy for! They no longer buy for the grand children, and give GGC a token present.
It just gets totally out of hand and you really need to draw the line somewhere.

I just say give and give and give as long as you are happy to do so, want to and can afford to. The minute it becomes a problem then stop. As long as the 'children' involved are not being deprived materially then they might not even notice the absence of one gift.

I buy for my 4 granddaughters who are 22 (on Christmas Day), 20, 19 and 18. The younger 2 (my daughter's daughters) always thank me and have bought gifts for me. The 19 year old always thanks me immediately she opens her gift. These three WhatsApp and text me quite often, too. The eldest usually thanks me but not always. I feel slightly miffed and rather sad as, although she is a student, she receives £350 a month from her father, on top of her 'keep' (which goes to her mother - parents separated when she was young, mother remarried), and she works, she has never bought me anything although she gives to her step-grandmother. It's hard to work out a cut-off point or whether to continue giving to those who acknowledge and interact with me more. This causes me lots of stress and I don't want to upset her father.

I suppose I'm lucky in that I don't have any children of my own, but do have nephews and nieces and great nephews and nieces. I can't ever see a time when I wouldn't send presents to them all; maybe you can reduce the amount you spend on the others, rather than not spend anything at all on them. I can't imagine my mother not buying presents for all her great grandchildren.

I have 5 GC aged from 8 to 17 and I will always give to them regardless of age. If/when I’m lucky enough to have great grandchildren I will do the same. However, if finances are tight I would either give less to each one, or do a “ family hamper” so that they all would benefit.

I have 3 grown up children, 9 grandchildren plus my own 10yr old daughter. And an 11 year old stepson. Plus 2 nieces and a godson. Money is very tight this year I've had to say I'm only buying for the ones under 16. Years ago we put a limit on how much we spend per child as we have such a big family. My mam still buys for all of the kids & grandkids & great grandkids but nothing expensive. We do tell her she doesn't need to.

Presents stop when they start work in our family.

I send a cheque to my granddaughter to buy something for each of her three children. Have given up giving presents.

family presents, but only a token gift, a tin if quality st etc

I am glad you brought this up today, as I have that exact problem this year, Husband ( second Husband) doesnt have any contact with his family,neither his Daughter or Grandchildren so no problem there? I have two adult children and four Grandchildren 14 -19 I also have an ex Daughter-in-Law who is still a huge part of our family, she has a partner who has a son 18 years old, one of my Grandsons had a girlfriend who we want to invite on Christmas Day, so now a huge HELP what do I do as I am alone on buying for everyone,my Husband helps with the food department but doesnt help financially with presents.This year had been a very expensive year for me with Birthdays, Graduations 18ths etc, I really cant afford presents for everyone. My Grandsons havent any Grandparent now, I am the only Grandparent which makes it sensitive of course, it is a real worry, I would love some advice please other GN,s

Hm999 for grandchildren that's exactly what I do. For my kids it was until they started producing kids of their own.

We've gone for Secret Santa this year, among the (6) adults. GCs will of course get the usual shedloads.

My sisters in law were quite a lot older than me (14 and 12 years) so we agreed that nephews and nieces would get cards and presents up to their 18th birthday then just a card after that. Because my two children are the youngest in their generation by some years (my eldest nephew is only a year younger than me) I have carried this on and given my gt nieces and gt nephews cards and presents up to their 18th birthdays too. I now have four gt gt nieces that I buy gifts and cards for - again I will continue (as long as I am still here that is!) up until they are 18 (they are 4, 3, 2 and 3 months) and will do so for any other gt gt nieces or gt gt nephews as they arrive. My MIL and FIL and my own parents passed away some years ago and I was widowed 20 years ago, there is only my younger SIL left now and she was widowed 3 years ago herself. I do buy for her (and her gorgeous dog!) but she is the only adult apart from my DD, DS and DIL that I do buy for - then I have my 5 DGC!

What is Secret Santa please?

I think as soon as your grandchildren have children of their own you should have a policy of only buying for the GGC. And if there's a lot of them, let your family know you are setting a spending limit or will send a little cheque for their piggy bank.

Rule in my family is that once they have children you stop buying Christmas presents for adults and buy for the children