Alone at Christmas.

Then look after yourself Vanatic plan what you want to do for the day.Eat whatever you fancy, have a walk, watch tv, read.Ring your DC on Christmas Day, and any friends too.
Come onto this forum, there will always be some posters here to say Happy Christmas to.
There are worst things than being alone on Christmas Day, I once had an awful time staying with friends, it wasn’t my idea of a good time, and I couldn’t wait to get away!

I am sorry to hear this and I will think of you. Have your offspring thought of taking you to their in laws? Do you know any other people on their own with whom you could get together? I would suggest volunteering either with Crisis or contact your local hospital. Otherwise, pick out your favourite boxed set, keep your jamas on cuddle up on the sofa. Best wishes xxxx

Hi Vanatic, I was in this same situation 3 years ago. Christmas with my family always meant so much to me but I was newly divorced and both my adult children were with their in-laws. I dreaded it but I thought about what I would like from the day.
I had a lie in till 8, got up and had breakfast in front of the TV, had a shower and got straight into my new PJs, slippers and dressing gown. The TV was on all day for a bit of background noise and I had my favourite lamb for Christmas dinner. I actually had quite as nice day with no rushing about. If it happens again I won't be concerned although I would obviously rather Ber with my family.
Give some thought to what you want your day to be like and I'm sure it wrong be half as bad as you fear

I won't be alone but it will just be my DH and me this year. I can't wait! I know several people who have no problem with being on their own, from the friend who is seeing off her DC to their dad on Christmas morning, then settling down with a bottle of prosecco, to the neighbour widow who just wants some peace and quiet and the TV despite several invites. We seem to have it drummed into us that we should spend Christmas with a huge family group but frankly I can think of nothing worse!

I'm sorry vanatic that you will be alone but I hope that you will have a peaceful and comfortable day. Will there be phone calls with absent family and friends? As someone else said there will be conversation on here.
Its just DY and I this year too - I'm not looking forward to it although DH is. I will do my best to make it lovely and we will have all the usual treats. Our sadness is that the church only has a children service on Christmas Morning not a traditional service.
I hope you have a good day and look after yourself.

I’m envious. I dream of being alone at Christmas. I am the only one in the family who lives in the north, so I always have to travel. Christmas involves a lot of driving (not by me) up and down the country, and it’s stressful and rushed. To be quite honest I’m dreading it. I don’t feel well enough to cope.

When I noticed this thread I had just been looking wistfully at the Radio Times and planning what I would watch and listen to if I were on my own. I think it would be bliss.

Vanatic, I promise you Christmas alone is far more enjoyable than with people you may not know well . It's a day, it comes and it goes. I shall miss not attending Midnight Mass and Matins but my younger daughter will phone as usual. I have two box sets ready because tv is sooo boring.

In the past I have often worked for a local mental health charity but that has now closed.

Vanatic Can you not swap "xmas day" to xmas eve or boxing day so your family can visit ?
If not get yourself all sorted with comfy PJs and a list from the TV and settle down to some festive food and enjoy.

Quite honestly Christmas is just another day and this year happens to be Monday.
Treat is as any other day but don't do the traditional wash.
I will not be alone physically but in all other ways I will.
My H is no company at all.
We have too many hangups about it.
I hope you have a peacefully, content and above all selfish and indulgent Christmas day.

I redecorated the bedroom. Two days hard graft. Didn't think about Christmas at all!

Although I will be with my son and daughter-in-law's parents on Christmas Day, I will feel very much alone. My husband passed away five week's ago after fifty one year's of marriage. Since he's gone, I have felt very alone. You can be surrounded with people yet feel alone. Losing my parner is the worst thing that has happened to me.

I hope you have a peaceful day, Vanatic, just enjoying T.V., reading and generally relaxing. The day soon passess like any other day.

I will be surrounded by 14other members of our family, so not exactly alone, but no Paw - what more can I say

To all of you whether “alone” or “lonely” it will be hard, but I hope you can find your own way through it to the other side .

I have Christmas alone sometimes from choice, it is fine.

If you fancy some human contact nip out out to a carol service, treat yourself to the best of the telly, fab food, good book and enjoy the day.

I have had some terrible times at Christmas, lonely in a group of people.............make the most of it.

annsixty - WHATEVER is 'the traditional wash'???

I will be travelling from London to Cornwall to stay with my daughter and her family - feel exhausted just writing that, but she doesn't want me to be alone. I lost my husband four years ago and it hit me badly because we were inseparable - Christmas just emphasises that.

There are usually local people serving Christmas lunch to those on their own on Christmas Day. Often churches. Another alternative.

Hi annsixty... I'm with you here! My kids and grandkids will be with us as usual..... and if it wasn't for them I would be alone ( not physically , but mentally) my husband bores me to death...all he cares about is football and how many of the 50 live matches over the Xmas period he can fit into his oh-so-busy t.v. scheduling. And if it's not football it's trains and railways. He only hands the remote to me when none of his greatest viewing desires can be realised!! And he actually calls it as me "having a choice". I wonder if you have the same 'thoughts' as I do annsixty?! Have a peaceful day ...I will think of you.

Hi maybe volunteer at Salvation Army on Xmas day you won't be alone then xx

I have been without my husband for forty years, it was very hard to come to terms with. I had our little daughters, my parents, three sisters but still missed him.

This year I have to accept a different Christmas , no sisters, daughter 2 long distance away and daughter 1 is dead , I ache for her , so this year will be the hardest ever to bear, no choice , just have to get through it.

Sorry to hear you will be alone at Christmas, sometimes it is the thought of it, but in reality it could be an enjoyable day for you. Spoil yourself with lots of little treats and your favourite TV programmes, maybe a good book if you enjoy reading. Think of it as just one day and it will put it into perspective. So many people spend every day alone. Christmas is,nt always a stress free day even if you are spending it with others, often tensions create problems and some long for the day to be over. A few years ago a someone I knew was going to be on her own after her relationship broke down. We invited her to join us for the day but she politely refused. She said "I,m going to do something positive about my Christmas and she did. Arranged with the local Salvation Army to help out serving the Christmas dinners at their centre to local homeless people....one of the best Christmas days she had....put things in perspective for her...and every other Christmas now she volunteers to serve the meals. It has put the whole meaning of Christmas in its right place for her.

You won’t be alone in so many ways.
I’ll think of you and toast you.
There is so much impossible social pressure put on it. On reading the posts I think of my poor mum. She always had to troop up here from London, and in her nineties she was begging reprieve ‘it’s only a day’ she used to say. Three of my friends insist on being Xmas refuseniks. And I salute them. We all have to find a way to survive the impossible day.
I have a rule ‘if you can get through it and nobody cries’ - bloody triumph.

I am so sorry you will be alone this Christmas but it's not so bad. After being the host at Christmas for most of the last 50 years I love being able to do just what I want on Christmas Day. 3 years ago my DH had left and my darling Mum had died in the space of 3 weeks so my daughter insisted I spent Christmas and New Year with them. It was so frenetic all the time I was glad to get home. Last year my DH was back and we made no plans for Christmas other than I cooked two joints of meat on Christmas Eve so we could at what we wanted. We had a lazy day and it was lovely. I am not a Christmas person anymore.

for Venus, Annie and all of you bereaved this Christmas.
And for Vanatic and others who not by choice will be alone at Christmas.

Yes, it is 'just another day' but it must be so hard to push aside the feelings of loss and loneliness. As others have said, come on GN on Christmas Day - there will be people to talk to here. You will all be in my thoughts.

I've just done the 600 mile train round trip to family. As I have to rely on public transport (train) I prefer to do it the week before it all begins. I do this as husband never wants to come. Christmas is just the two of us. We don't bother much for the actual day, it's more about the nibbly things for the evenings. I've made my own mince pies inc the mincemeat and the cake. I'm the one who buys and wraps the presents plus the Christmas cards,tree etc basically everything. He just brings the grumps !!

I don’t think saying poor you is that helpful just underlines sadness The day is what you make of it if I was totally alone I d volunteer to help at Sally Army or similar My friend travelled to be part of her family last year She didn’t bond with the sons in laws who were all very loud and drinking heavily she had a long tiring journey and felt she didn’t fit in at all things were done differently and at different times everyone stayed up late quite noisy and intoxicated when she wanted to be tucked up This year she chose to spend it on her own and is so looking forward to just pottering around and cooking herself a nice dinner in her own home
It’s a day like any other all the hype about families is just that, hype the most family rows happen at Christmastime don’t worry you re missing out on the Happy songs around the treelook after yourself and do exactly what you want to do with your day xx