Ben Needham

Where's this, Bluebelle? Every interview I've seen with Ben's mum has been very appreciative of the help they have had and very supportive of the police, so I can't imagine she'll be part of this.

It was on Tv this am Maggie and they said appreciative things after the Nan s understandable upset statement, but she sounded angry at the time and said the police hadn't done enough and to me they've done a lot I m sure to those suffering it will never be enough though

It's Ben Needam's gran and grandfather who was looking after him when he disappeared. So I expect there's a lot of complicated emotions at work there.

Yes I thought that too Anya and I can understand it I wasn't knocking her just felt I needed to balance it as I feel a lot has been done for a child lost in another country

I suppose they also felt that this time they were close to finding Ben, but the plug was pulled because funding ran out I believe. It must be heartbreaking not even to have a body.

They must feel terrible guilt as well as anguish at not knowing.
I feel a lot has been done for a child lost in another country I suppose that is a quandary, especially if the local police of that country are not doing what the British police would do here and how much a 'foreign' ie British, police force are able to do or are allowed to do in another country.

I have never understood why there wasn't the outcry of horror at this baby being let out to play on a building site on his own that there was at the McCanns leaving their children in bed ...maybe someone would exlain it .I do know that when my kids were small mmany families on fooreign holidays in Majorca and Portugal etc left kids asleep to dine with their adult friends ..something I hasten to add I never did .But I never let my little ones out to play alone either and always sat on the step to keep an eye on them .I'd guess Nanna is feeling guilt ,even after all these years.It wuld have given them closure if he had at last been found

Guilt is a part of the grieving process, which this poor family have never been able to work through.

It is hard to look back on something unsolved like this, when we have seen so many fictional detectives solving old crimes and cold cases, the telly makes it all look so easy.

Two young boys, cousins I think, in Chelmsley Wood, near Birmingham went missing and police really didn't seem to bother much. Quite a few years ago now. I believe they had the odd search, but not as much as for many others that disappear. I think the attitude was that they were possibly the type that would suddenly turn up again. Not everyone gets the same treatment! So very sad.

I was thinking about Ben this morning ..... After reading a Facebook link regarding Madeleine McCann. Both of these tragic stories are soooo hard to forget.

I also read some of the vile comments posted about Madeleine's parents. Who are these horrible people who post such vicious comments ....

None of us know what happened to these two beautiful children. A living nightmare for their parents.

Some cruel persons DO KNOW what happened to these poor little children. I just pray that one day their consciences will kick in.

Teddy I too was shocked and sickened by the vitriol against the McCanns.

I have every sympathy for the Needhams and the McCanns but have never understood why so much government money and effort has been spent looking for them in another country. As has been said by others many children disappear but I don't recall such effort being done for any others. How have they been able to get so much support?

Difficult one ...whilst feeling sympathy with any parent of a child who has disappeared (also not forgetting the girl in Germany/Austria who was found after so long after being abducted and forced to live in the cellar) I would imagine the parents never give up hope. The grand mother is obviously feeling the pressure of guilt at letting a small boy play on a building site where there was heavy machinery working and not keeping an eye on him. I would imagine the McCann's are equally feeling the cost of a childminder provided by their tour company would have been worth a million pounds after what happened, When we used to take out small D to Portugal on hols we took her with us whatever the time .....even though the villa we rented had a live in housekpeer/nanny. She did not suffer for a very few late nights ,,,far better she lost a little sleep than was never seen again. Hindsight is a wonderful thing !

I wonder how many people watched The Missing and the previous one ......luckily the second series had a better ending but I wonder what the two brothers that wrote it based it on ?

Very sad ....but never forget perhaps there but for fortune
and never give up hope !

I believe ( but could be wrong as it was a long time ago) that when Ben Needham first went missing there were a lot of people (police) who thought his family had something to do with it. I don't think they searched then in the same way they have for Madeline. The recent police involvement in the search for Ben came after a new lead about what might have happened to him and also his family fighting for more action. Perhaps it was the initial lack of searching that the grandmother was referring back to.

Whatever the reason, I feel for all the families in this situation and the dreadful pain they must suffer every day.

I don't understand why so much went into these searches, everyone's child that goes missing is as important, each child missing deserves the same treatment. it us not fair that done get all the stops pulled out for years and yet others barely a mention. I don't know how you live with the guilt when you have left young children unattended.

It wasn't that many years ago that it was accepted practice to spend a holiday at a the best known holiday camp and leave your kids asleep in the chalets with a member of staff doing regular rounds and if a child was heard crying in a chalet it was given out over the microphone in the ballroom
It's easy to be sanctimonious and criticise other parents and hindsight is a wonderful thing
These families are in a living hell and my heart goes out to them

We did that Soos I am horrified when I think about it now.

I don't think the Needham case was ever as high profile as the McCanns and yes initially the child's uncle was held and questioned about Ben's disappearance. I would imagine the gran is still angry about this, and combined with recent events, this proved too much for her.

I am sure a British little girl went missing in a German supermarket before that, but we heard very little about it.

I have just found it online:
www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-tees-16928490
another heartbreaking story of a missing child.

My understanding was not that Ben had been allowed to play on the building site, but that there was a misunderstanding about who was looking after him: that his grandparents thought he had gone with his uncle, and uncle thought he had stayed with grandparents.
I may have misremembered, but I do remember thinking "oh, that could so easily happen to us when there's a lot of people about". So I always, as family gatherings, make sure each little person has an allocated, responsible big one, who has to specifically 'hand over' if they are going 'off watch'!

i think its disgusting another £90,0000 on maddie mc cann they are at fault going out and leaving 3 kids on there own every night,them pair have got money they should pay to carry on this search,not bloody tax payer,theres hundreds of kids out there missing and they don,t get the coverage they got.the goverment should be not be funding two irresponsible parents it makes me so angry that the likes of them get money thrown at them and using a lot of that money to pay morgage/bills etc

josie you sound very bitter about this, don't know that there was any suggestion of children being left alone on a regular basis. Hindsight is a wonderful thing and I'm sure most parents have memories of less than perfect care of their children, I know I have.
I do agree the McCanns have managed to keep Maddie at the forefront of police investigations but most parents would do their utmost to get a result. I agree with others when they say Ben Needham 's grandparents have a degree of guilt about his disappearance but there for the grace of God etc.
Let's have some milk of human kindness.

Other long investigations into cases cost a similar amount. We can't allow children to disappear without making efforts to find them whenever fresh evidence comes to light - the children are blameless, whatever each of us personally thinks about their parents.

Some parents have been found to have murdered their children - we don't grudge the child the money spent on getting to the truth then, and we shouldn't grudge it for a possible lapse of attention by their parents either.