Is it fair, on this website...

Jings I think you may be referring to my earlier post today on the bereavement forum. The thing is, the post is clearly signposted as a bereavement forum post. If I think from the heading that a post is not going to be to my liking, I simply do not read it. But this is a public forum and people will bring all sorts of needs and wants and concerns to it and are free to post what they will.

As a bereaved parent, this particular weekend is naturally poignant. I was just acknowledging for others that that is the case. I still expect to enjoy elements of the weekend, but it is not 'maudlin' to recognise that it can be difficult.

I hope you have a really great celebration.

How unkind that is to people who need support, particularly those who have fee if any people to confide in.

Grannylin I have already said I am all for giving sympathy and support as the need arises individually. I just don't see the point in clouding every special day.

It's what I think.

Not very 'Christian' of you if I may say so, jingl.
One thing I've learned as I've got older is that sadness is always in our lives. I think of the celebrations at the end of the war, everyone dancing in the streets and there must have been so very many whose lives had been irreparably damaged by that conflict.

It doesn't hurt to spare a thought for those who will be remembering loved ones tomorrow, does it?

few!

So many of us will be remembering our own mothers tomorrow. This can be positive with happy memories of Mothering Sundays spent together but also with regret at our mothers' passing.

I know what you mean Jing

"Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and you cry alone"
Really???
I think that is the opposite of the strength of Gransnet and I think it is a selfish and unworthy comment.
Being supportive is not " introducing misery to everything"

Imperfect27 clearly stated that her post was on the bereavement column. She is not clouding a special day and her post appeared to help others who had lost a child- one or two quite recently. My heart goes out to them all.

I think starting this thread is unkind to Imperfect27 and others.

I think you will agree with that yourself, later in the day jingl

I think, for your own state of mind, you like to keep things sunny in your own life.
But as others have said, Imperfect27 posted on a Bereavement forum, so no need to read it if you hadn't wanted to.

Shame on you jingl - just because everything's fine in your own little world, no one should impose their pain on you?

Selfish IMO.

Try walking in someone else's shoes for a change.

And you aggie'

Er, has anyone read the 'Was feeling a bit miffed'post?

No, it was too depressing - why introduce misery into Mothers' Day?

I agree totally Anya, and what's more, think that Imperfect has been very gracious in her reply , more than I would have been, that's for sure.

I thought Imperfect's post was sensitively written and strikes a chord with a number of people. In church we always pray for the childless on Mothers Day. It would be inconceivable to celebrate Mothers Day as if it was a happy, jolly day for everyone.

I am sitting here thinking of my dead Mother , I am looking at my poor Husband who is trying to eat his lunch unaided and came on here for a bit of a read , sorry to agree with Jing . I still agree with her

Totally illogical aggie - according to jingl you shouldn't be mentioning your mother or your husband.

ok I will try and arrange the flowers DD3 has sent me and try not to think of them

Life isn't fair, jings. Deal with it (as Minibags would say).

Some of you may already know that jingl has also suffered tragedy and loss that some people would find impossible to deal with.

No need to come down on her like a ton of bricks.

It often happens that when a thread starts off on a joyful note, a guilt trip soon emerges because somebody posts about a sad experience. Sometimes people are taken to task for being insensitive but is that fair?

Just saying.

I'm with Jings. My DS died on Easter Sunday. Her death clouded several Easters but then we got back to enjoying them, DS is now remembered with a toast to 'Absent Friends' and happy talk and recollected memories. Sadness doesn't come into it.

Death is an inevitable part of life. Few people over 15 will not have experienced a family bereavement. There will always be times when a tragedy, personal or public will overhang a happy occasion, but I do not see any reason why every happy occasion should have to have a resident doom-sayer to cloud the occasion.

Of course I will remember DM tomorrow, but with a smile and a giggle, she was a great giggler, and no tinge of sadness.

Well I'm not with jings on this. She didn't have to look at the new thread on the bereavement forum. She didn't even have to look at Gransnet today if her enjoyment of the day is so fragile. And she can't assume everyone knows about her own personal tragedies. I didn't. I'm sorry for them but I'm also sorry for other people's sadness today or whatever Other People's Celebratory Day it lands on as well as being glad for people who are celebrating anything today.

"Life isn't fair. Deal with it" is not a ton of bricks. It's just plain unselfish reality.