i totally sympathise with you, it is a hard time , and whilst in practical terms it can be sensible, and we may have planned the move ourselves. Yet mentally it is always a wrench, sometimes worse than others. I have moved 19 times to my recollection, both here and abroad and my last move was after my husband had died; when it was a very sensible and practical move to a ground floor flat, but it nevertheless was quite painful doing it., especially having to give up my piano (too big) and leave my garden.
Can I suggest one or two ideas that might be a bit of help. Choose a chair you find comfortable and look for a small table that you could put next to it, and organise that these two things, plus your radio or tv, plus notebook and pen , along with any glasses or hearing aids or walking sticks you may use, are labelled to be the first things to be set up in your new home. If they can be put near a window, facing outwards, you then have your special corner, which you can retreat to, whenever things get too much. I do find that is very worthwhile, to be able to retreat to my corner, and I always have a couple of my poetry books which again let me have a break from sorting and I can look up and away from whatever chaos is behind me.
If you have a garden at your new home, it can be calming to wander round with secateurs, to give you a break, Snipping weeds or deadheading can be quite good to release stress. You could take a notebook and write down what plants you see, and draw a little plan of the borders. Usually there is much to do when you move and the garden gets left for quite a while, so taking a few pictures and making a plan, will be very useful when you get round to thinking about the garden later. Although of course this year with the heat we have had it will probably not be its normal summer style.
We cannot pretend that it is easy and I know that other friends and I have all found that the days dont work in a set pattern, so that you can have two or three days in a reasonable state and then wake up on another morning very sad and miserable. I think only you can decide what to do, there will be some days when you think it would be good to get out and about, and on another day, just shut the door and think of your husband and your past life. If you are having that sort of day, perhaps you might write down or record some memories of earlier life with your husband that your grandchildren or great grandchildren might like to read in years to come.
As you slowly begin to get used to your new home, then I do think that it is very worth while taking time each day , if you are mobile and able to get about, to begin to explore. Have a little walk up and down your road, and look at the gardens, and see what grows well there. Find your way to the local library, which is something I always did on the second day of arriving somewhere. That is the best place for you to not only get your own ticket but they usually have lists of clubs and activities, which are up to date and will give you ways to find things that might be of interest. Have a wander and visit a cafe for just a coffee , which will let you look about at what is being served, and see what the food looks like. Look on the local map and see where the nearest parks or gardens are and find the best way to get to them. If you swim check out what pools or leisure centres are nearby.
One other thing that you can consider even if it is bittersweet. We have been used to sharing our lives and, of course ,doing much giving and taking. So now it is your new home, and you will have many photos and mementoes of your husband, but now you can set your home out as you choose. Think what just suits you in arranging furniture and when it comes to curtains etc., it is up to you , So if you always fancied polka dots or purple and green stripes , go for it, it is your choice now .
Wishing you an easy move and hope that one or two of my ideas are of help to you. Let us know how things go. Best wishes
