Decision to make

I'm sorry your husband recently died

I'm a bit confused - is this a long term holiday exchange that you're planning?

And what's with the mice thing - mice can enter any property.

It's a permanent house exchange

I woukd not want to go into a property that already has mice

Are you in Australia where they are overrun with mice---a plague of them in fact ?

My Mum had a shared entrance, it had a door that you had to buzz in, why do you think it might have mice? If it isn’t cleaned then it might attract insects, but I’m not sure about mice and a buzzer stopped unwanted visitors.
Usually nothing is kept in shared hallways in LA housing, due to Fire regs, so there should be an easy space to just hoover if you want to.
In Mums they kept their own piece of landing clean and tidy.
Try to get as many photos of the inside of the property before you agree to exchange, we had to get the builders in for Mum as the place was a mess, as it was an exchange no one made sure that the property was in a good state of repair and so we had to do it.
Sorry for your recent loss and I hope a move will help you.

I am sorry about your husband. I wonder if it’s too soon to make these big decisions about moving now. You don’t seem sure about this one and I wonder whether you might be rushing this a bit. Is there a need to decide now?
If you are looking fir a flat don’t they usually share entrances, and as for mice they are everywhere but if you are in Australia we have heard about the mice problem there. You will know better than us.
I hope whatever you decide that you are happy and I am sending you my best wishes

If your mum did an exchange the property should have been put in good order first, you may be sble to get compensated.

Yes true I am not sure about this particular property I am not keen on shared entrance because at present I don't have shared entrance and it will feel like going backwards instead of forwards

Yes think you Could be right about making a decision too soon but you see I know I would be happier if I moved.

Thank you really appreciate your comments realllly helping ??

My mum has a shared entrance & hates it. Luckily she has decent neighbours. Her neighbour across her landing is moving so she's worried about who might move in. Her block is currently very quiet & neighbourly but who knows what the future holds?
I'm sorry for your bereavement & sadness but in your shoes, I think I'd stay put for a while. Give yourself recovery time & the cessation of Covid lockdown. If you're asking Grans for advice maybe your gut is telling you something? "When it's right you'll know it's right."

Nonogran I read your post directly after letting the girl know that I have decided against moving, so was really happy to see your comments

You are right if I were sure then I wouldn't need to ask

I used to ask my husband and speak to him about any decisions

I honestly can't put in words how grateful I am to get your opinions, sometimes stuff goes round and round in your head and you just need someone else's take on things

Thank you soo much for all posts thank you ??

Condolences on your recent bereavement.

As has been said it's very early days and as much as you want to move on this move may be too soon for you.

Also you have mentioned your concerns re mice and a shared entrance.

These are your concerns and they are there for a reason.

Your concerns have already lead you to ask questions on here and have given you time to stop and consider your choices.

Both are very good things and as Nonogran has already said "what is your gut telling you ?"

It's good that you are thinking hard about this move and not just working from your feelings.

I understand from reading your post that you would normally discus these things with your husband but it seems to me that you already have a reasonable handle on this move and any future issues.

May be this isn't the time or the property swap for you, only you can make the decision on your future, take the time you need.

As for shared entrances, my sister lives in a flat with a shared entrance, it's not a major issue for her at the moment but what she has had to deal with is some very difficult neighbours.

When she moved it the neighbours were lovely, friendly, respectful and followed the rules of the property, no problems.

Over the years she's had bikes, motor bikes, furniture and rubbish in the shared entrance to navigate getting in and out so I think you are wise taking your time to think this through.

Can't comment on the nice but if there is a problem where you are doing your research is a good thing. Best of Luck with whatever you choose to do going forward.

Crossed posts, just read you've already told the person you're not moving. Hope you find what you need when it's the right time.

it's generally not wise to make such a big decision so soon.
look again in say january.
all the best.
it's hard to be alone.
take care.

Condolences on your bereavement

They (whoever they may be) always say you should wait a year after a bereavement befor making any big decisions, or acting on them and I think you are supplying a case history about why that is. You want to move and in your first post you were planning to move into a flat you were not sure about, just so you could move. Wisely you have since changed your mind

I can understand that you feel that you must move from somewhere that will always remind you of your loss, but avoid jumping out of the frying pan into the fire. Wait that year and then spend the last part of the year starting to implement them.

Oh I know of small blocks of flats in my area which are sheltered and also have a communal living area where residents can sit together and chat. Occasionally there might be a little bit of entertainment provided. Possibly a warden onsite in their own flat. You could then have a little bit of a housing support plan when you can talk issues and problems through. The ones I know of have a secure entry system and are generally carpeted corridors. Regularly cleaned etc. That would be my suggestion. I might not mind it for myself!