Returning to the UK

I don't know what the situation would be under French law but certainly I'd be refusing to fund more major projects for them.

Good luck, perhaps other Gransnetters might know more.

I’m afraid I have no idea of your legal position, but didn’t want to read and run. Did you make your son and DiL sign anything when you contributed all that money?

Is there any friend locally who could help you consult a French lawyer - if your own French isn’t up to it?
Sorry, not much help I know, but I do send sympathy and hope you can work something out soon. 🎄

Oh dear Angel that’s so sad that’s why I never advocate following a child anywhere, for some it’s brilliant, but if it doesn’t work what a palaver and true upset
Weren’t there any warning signs when he wouldn’t add you to the deeds although you gave them money
Unfortunately you probably would need a solicitor to sort this out and that’s more money
Have you enough money to travel home? Is there a relative you can temporally stay with while you get a bit of your pension together to rent a small place or even a room ?
I can understand your need to come home it sounds so very very sad x

That is very sad and and a awful situation to be in. See a solicitor as soon as possible.

But I don’t think angelbreeze has money for a solicitor freya

angelbreeze Your so hasn’t been entirely truthful with you.
Even though we left the eu you do not have to set up a company to buy property. I have done this in a non eucountry.
What I would do in your situation is, read as much as you can and join a French expat site. They will have a mine of information suited to your predicament.

I know nothing of property law outside England and Wales, but Google leads me to believe that in France more than two people can own a property without having to set up a company. (In England and Wales the maximum number of legal owners is four but they can hold the property in trust for themselves and/or others.)

I am very sorry to say this but I think your son has conned you. You are not one of the legal owners but have nevertheless been paying a third of the expenses connected to the property despite your limited income and now that you need some work done to your cottage you are told this isn’t possible but further work is needed to the rest of the property.

I wish I had knowledge of French property law but as a retired solicitor qualified only in England and Wales I don’t. All I can say is that this is very wrong; in England and Wales you would have an equitable interest in whole of the property which you could enforce in the courts. I would be very surprised if French law did not recognise your contributions to the original purchase price of the whole property and the ongoing costs of maintenance, repair and improvement.

You need the advice of a lawyer who is qualified in French law. This is a possibility, but not the only one
www.connexionfrance.com/article/Practical/Your-Questions/Everyday-Life/Where-can-I-go-to-obtain-free-advice-about-legal-issues-in-France
Do you have any family in the UK who could help you to extract yourself from this arrangement? As you say that the relationship with your son isn’t good, don’t be afraid of taking whatever legal action is available to you.

I wish you well.

I agree with GSM what a nasty piece of work your son is. They want a swimming pool and a gravel drive, expect you to pay a third, and then give you no money to make the repairs your cottage needs.
I think if you want to return to the UK, and you have a audit trail of all the money you have given your son, you could contact a solicitor for advice only at first whatever their rate is for one session.
I really hope this works for you, and you get a fair outcome.

Oh I knew someone would help you with information what a dreadful shame I feel so sorry this has happened to you I do hope you can extricate yourself , get your money and come back and start again with happiness for your latter years
💐

I would suggest you post what you’ve posted here on this site

Your cottage should at least have been in your name on the deeds. This situation it very unsavoury and it will probably be quite difficult to extract any money .. I would keep living in your cottage until you resolve this, so that you don't become homeless, even if your son is unpleasant.

You would need quite a large sum of money to return to the UK and find somewhere to live, unless you have people who will house you.. If you can get financial help from friends or family it might be best spent on a french lawyer.. I don't know how good your French is but it could be worth googling to see if there are any Brits local to you who could translate if needed.. I really hope you find the help you need

There is a Facebook group called Strictly Legal France. There are some very well-informed people on there. In my opinion it is better than any of the forums.

Sorry Jaxjacky hadn't spotted your post. I would add that it should be possible to find an English-speaking notaire.

I have no legal knowledge, but my understanding is that in France, members of your family have a legal duty of care to each other. They can't make you homeless or let you go hungry which is a start. I assume you are not in the French system, so you quickly need to organise some form of medical insurance which will swallow up a fair amount of your pension. Then just tell your son and DIL truthfully there won't be any left for the pool or gravel drive.
As for coming back to the UK, you might have to rely on other family members to help you out, but they might not be pleased if you have given all your savings to your son in France.

This situation is so very sad to read. It must be heartbreaking to live it OP. Never mind the legalities what about the morality of what your own son has done to you. It borders on bullying/coercive behaviour. Quite frankly it stinks. I don’t know how they sleep at night.

I can’t imagine your torment. I hope you get sorted somehow and get peace of mind very soon. All the best OP.

I feel really sorry for you and it must be a worry even thinking about how to get yourself and all your belongings back “home”. Do you have any siblings who could support you?
Definitely contact that site recommended above and you might also contact Age UK because even though we are talking about France, they do advise on abuse of elderly which it really sounds like it is.

This is heartbreaking I feel so so sad for you Angelbreeze it’s very upsetting I so hope you get some help and get back home soon x

Such a very sad situation for you. I do hope you get the advice you need and are able to return to the UK, and resume a happy life. 💐

help with decorating the old cottage on the property that I live in
Oh yes, and if you are making changes to the property like improvements to aid your mobilty, make sure it is done by a registered professional because you will qualify for a tax credit, of around 25% I think, on all the equipment and installation. Keep your receipts for this.

I would do a pascal has suggested and stay in the cottage and would also stop making any financial contributions, keeping my spending for my own bills.

Can't you return to UK and try for some social housing and help until you get sorted.
We help loads of immigrants and refugees, so I'd think it's a reasonable request.

might not be so easy to get social housing. local authority might consider it was alienation of assets.
OP needs to take legal advice, and stop subsidising them immediately.
they've really done a number on you.
it's not all that uncommon, unfortunately.
i knew of someone lived all her life in council housing in inner london.
daughter and GS saw rich pickings, and persuaded her to buy the flat, with tenant's discount, and their finance.
they said she could come to live near them in berks, and all be happy together.
purporting to support her in later years.
they moved her into a dull studio flat, where she knew no one, no shops nearby, totally isolated, and never visited her.
they let the london flat, which was v near the city, and made lots of money.
the poor woman used to ring her old friend in london, crying.
that friend's children would drive from kent to take her to their mum on xmas, and back the same day.
her own family never bothered with her.
she was utterly depressed, it was pitiable.
she and her old friend had always had a laugh and gone about together.
she said she had made a mistake, but thought it was just the location.
she could not bring herself to see what her family had done to her.

What a heartbreaking situation to be in. Shame on your son.
I hope you can find someone to help you.

It’s so hard to hear things said against the ones we love too