I'm 50 and I don't know what to do when I grow up!

At 67, I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up but I did re-invent myself a few times according to the family situation & in the end I found a niche where my independent way of working was possible & useful, without being subjected to bosses & too many rules, & it allowed me to travel the world, earn a reasonable living & get a reputation - of sorts!

After years in offices or shops, I found myself taking a whole new direction 4 years ago, that became something even bigger.
Was out of work due to redundancy, spotted a part-time job as a dinnerlady at my GS1's special needs school, got it, loved it so much started doing voluntary hours in a classroom too, and am now a fully fledged SEN Teaching Assistant of 2 years standing, at 53.
It's something I never in a million years thought I would end up doing, but I absolutely love it! So much so, that I also do PA/Carer work for 3 of the pupils outside of school hours too.
If you've something in the back of your mind that you fancy having a go at holdthetonic, go for it, and good luck!

Hmm...

Oh my gosh you are a spring chicken!!! I'm 53 and started my own business in Health & Nutrition 18months ago with the backing of a fantastic company and I absolutely love it, I'm having such fun. Last April I was given a holiday in Hawaii........ I have 5 children and 9 Grandchildren!! One of my children joined my company and another is just about to, she has 4 children and couldn't go out to work so she is now going to build her business from home.... fantastic!!! There are so many opportunities out there its up to you to find them. I would be very pleased to talk to you about my business if you want to get in touch with me.

I haven't worked for two years, off for a part time job interview on Thursday, four days before my 65th birthday - somewhat nervous!

I agree about the shared income. Our marriage date was determined by the fact that my OH had no grant for his studies and that I could get a grant that included him as a dependent! We had a joint bank account straight away and have never altered that situation. We each trust the other to spend our money wisely and consult if we are thinking of a bigger expenditure than normal - it's cameras with me! The question of who was or was not earning or who was earning more never came into it.

Never understood the thing about financial independence. All our money was shared. He worked when I was studying. I worked when he was studying. I was able to give up teaching because he was earning enough to pay the bills. After he fell off a ladder and broke his back, I was earning to pay the bills.
Neither of us ever felt resentment at paying for the other or depending on the other. Things happen in life. You share; at least we did.

Now! I left it too late, too busy with teenagers, elderly parents and trying to earn some money to go and re-train.

Mmm..I get the bit about losing salary, and independence. Is there a way you could do something (like retrain/ new qualification) whilst in work. The work could tide you over until you are established in your new career.

Have you thought about taking out a career development loan to help you with the costs?

One option I'm hoping to try out is taking foreign language students in to help make ends meet. Could you perhaps do something like this?

Have you completed a skills questionnaire? There's loads online. It may help you to focus your current skills and interests.

Thank you so much for all these words of encouragement. I really appreciate it. to all of you.

Re: volunteering, I agree it's really worth doing. I already volunteer at our local food bank and I find it hugely satisfying/ humbling.

Re: turning a hobby into a living - I don't really have any hobbies - just lots of interests so nothing that can be transformed into a money making venture. I would like to do something in the caring professions…. so I need to think along those lines.

One problem with giving up my job (and having nothing to go to) is my salary (1/4 of my husband's) does give me a bit of financial independence from him. How do people cope with that loss of independence ?

Thanks again

What takes your fancy? And can you afford not to work while you re-train? How about something that draws on current skills but pushes you a bit harder, like training as a school bursar or school business manager?

Congrats on your new addition. .

I'm 54 and not yet grown up either. For a few years now I've been doing piano (a lapsed childhood hobby) as an adult and I'm loving it so much that I'm determined to become a "proper" teacher of piano. I'm doing a piano teaching diploma and a grade 8 in piano. That's my thing-what's yours?

Have you a hobby you could turn into a living? Or a passion you'd like to follow but haven't been able to? Think of it: your retirement age will be around 67 or perhaps later- that's loads of time to establish yourself in a new career.

Life's too short and full of opportunities for regrets about what might have been. Now's the time to find something you love-go for it, girl!

Bored stiff with my secretarial job in my 40s, volunteered to help with reading in an Adult Education Office, then went to Uni at 50 to get my teaching qualifications and taught adults until I retired at 63.

I think from all the comments you see above we all think you need to 'grasp the nettle' and move on. Volunteering is a good way to start the change.

Best of luck.

57 and still don't know what I want to do/be !

Just don't do anthing to mess up your pension. When I was 50 retirement age seemed such a long way away but I'm so glad now that I've got a small works pension to top up my state pension; if I hadn't I'd still be working for the forseeable future.

I retrained and changed careers when I was 50 and I have never regretted it. It was a big financial risk, but it brought great personal satisfaction. And it also demonstrated something important to the children I feel - they were 100% behind me and learned that money is not everything.

You could stay put, but start keeping an bit of an eye on what else is out there, and if something interesting comes along, then go for it and see what happens. Nothing ventured and all of that!

Or you could do an OU degree; or take up some sort of voluntary role that gives you personal satisfaction. Lots of options - the world is still your oyster. I wish I was 50!

When I was 50 we moved Continents and set up a new life & business for nearly 10yrs,no good sitting at home in your dotage and thinking "I should have done that" can you try the new short course for teaching maybe ? I know a friend who has just completed a course to become a nurse and she is 49 this year so never too late go for it.

I've had three careers: Outside catering as well as owning a Pub/Restaurant, garden design and running my own small perennial nursery and finally teaching Food Technology in a secondary school.

Take the plunge, holdthetonic

I changed jobs completely when I was 40, then again when I was 50.
If you do not do it now, you never will. And yes, it is scary, but do you want to look back on missed opportunities?

Whatever it is - GO for it. Life's too short and you only go around once. Grab whatever it is by the short and curlies and never mind the consequences (well, you know what I mean, within reason)