Is this behaviour appropriate.

I've been a member of GN for almost 10 year and have always thought it clique-y in the sense that posts on almost any subject can quickly become full of banter and in-group comments. Of course it isn't intentionally exclusive but that can be the effect.

To answer the original question, no, I don't find it appropriate at all.

Usedtobeblonde

Or even a “thumbs down” button.
I can recall many posts I would have welcomed that but truthfully would have been too cowardly to use it☺️

I think any publicly visible react button would only result in more unpleasantness and we’ve enough of that atm.

Oreo

Tuliptree are you a fairly new poster or a returned poster? Just wondering.
I have been here for over three years and in that time have seen nothing but good sense and humour from Allira and there are many other posters who have been here for much longer who know that she sure didn’t deserve a ban.I’ve hardly seen any deletions never mind an outright ban and many of us cannot understand why a pleasant GN member has had to leave the forum.
The only ‘clique’ which is a misnomer anyway, is that Allira has a lot of friends here.

This thread is not about the rights or wrongs re Allira!!

It is about how the campaign to re-instate her is being introduced on, and potentially derailing, other threads, including one's where people need help and support and understanding! That is not appropriate!

Like many others I suspect, I don’t know Allira or her previous name Callistemon. Those who’ve been members a long time clearly do and feel very strongly about her banning. Fair enough. But thereve been two threads so far devoted to that topic. My view is that it neither desirable or necessary to carry that on into other threads. In this I think Tuliptree is correct.

For those who don’t know her, although we have all realised she’s been banned, it can be off putting. What next, travel or gardening?

Is this doing Allira a service or is it inadvertently having the opposite effect.

Does anybody stop to think about the other person involved or persons, who and what led to the ban?

As I say, I’ve absolutely no idea what this is all about but I’m not entirely sure this is the way to right what many think is a wrong. There comes a point when it becomes irritating. Is that what the supporters want? Will it drive away those who, like me, haven’t the faintest idea what it’s all about.

Happy to be shot down in flames.

Or even a “thumbs down” button.
I can recall many posts I would have welcomed that but truthfully would have been too cowardly to use it☺️

I’ve only just found out that the react button on MN is only seen by the person whose post is being reacted to.

Yes, I would like a 'like' button.

I have been a member of GN since it started under two usernames but I rarely post, I'm not retired so have less time I guess. When I did post a little bit more I got some very unpleasant replies from some posters who were subsequently banned (I didn't report them but noticed they posted a lot of racism and homophobia which possibly resulted in a ban) so I dialled down a bit and now mainly read. When I do post I like to think my posts are helpful and carefully considered but most of the time I find they are ignored which can be a little off putting when one has spent a considerable amount of time making sure the information given is accurate.
I particularly find the 'Are you a new poster?' rude. If it is followed by 'If so welcome to GN' It lands in a totally different way. Just the are you new seems to imply that your views are not worthy of consideration until you have been around a while.

Delila

“Tuliptree are you a fairly new poster or a returned poster? Just wondering?”

What is the relevance of that question Oreo?

Indeed.That’s why I ignored it.

“Tuliptree are you a fairly new poster or a returned poster? Just wondering?”

What is the relevance of that question Oreo?

kittylester

Tuliptree no one owns a thread nor can they dictate the direction it takes.

But a group of you decided to deliberately spam threads didn’t you in support of Allira regardless ? As if you thought you owned GN -let alone a thread.

Blimey - starting to realize why I limit my time on here & don’t get too involved in anything. Never been interested in being in a clique ( which is just as well as I’m not popular or remotely interesting )
The sticking up for banned friends is nothing new though, anyone who was on MN back in the day might remember the banning of Anyfucker ( yes that really was her username ) that went on for weeks!
I do agree that the issue shouldn’t spread onto other threads. You don’t want to annoy posters who have no interest ( or clue )

Tuliptree no one owns a thread nor can they dictate the direction it takes.

Well, people have made their thoughts known. Whether other people are willing to take them on board is another matter. I can't help thinking that the two things are linked, though.

Crikey.

Gransnet is our site, it’s a free for all, we can’t stop other people’s behaviour, but individually our voices all carry the same weight, and we can say when we think differently to them.

I don’t buy the stuff about cliques of any kind, those who aren’t happy have every opportunity to say what they think on any subject, and to start their own thread if what they want to discuss isn’t yet a topic.

Please don’t feel excluded new posters, people do read what you say, and will comment if you say something interesting. Some threads get very heated - I personally think the Estrangement threads are the most brutal, but there aren’t actually gangs as far as I know anywhere, it’s just that on some topics, particularly politics, you may find more who disagree with you rather than who agree - which is just like real life.

GrannyGravy13

There wasn’t a discussion regarding Allira on the Henry Novak thread.

There was one post musing what her thoughts were plus have been if she hadn’t been banned 🤦‍♀️

And it provoked responses didn’t it on that thread. Can you really not bring yourself to actually say it was an inappropriate post? Or is it ‘group think’?

There wasn’t a discussion regarding Allira on the Henry Novak thread.

There was one post musing what her thoughts were plus have been if she hadn’t been banned 🤦‍♀️

Doodledog

Oh for goodness’ sake!

This is not about whether Allira deserved to be banned. It is about how the campaign for her reinstatement is being handled. Very different things.

Absolutely. The way the campaign to reinstate the banned poster is being handled, in particular the constant references to the banned poster on unrelated threads, is more likely to attract annoyance than support from posters, particularly those who have no views, either way, in the reinstatement of the banned poster. If I want to read about the poster's banishment I can read the Disappearing Contributors thread.

To discuss the banishment of the poster on the thread discussing the murder of Henry Nowak was insensitive and inappropriate.

I agree petra I have made several good pals through GN.

If anything it was a clique that engineered Allira’s downfall and subsequent suspension…

Flippin2

I'm relatively new too,I don't post a lot but I do read things that interest me,there is a definite clique on the site ,reminds me of the mums at the school gates,if you don't fit you're not in and yes I noticed the comments on the Henry Nowak thread and agree they're not necessary and should remain on the appropriate page

What you call a clique happens on all SM sites that have been operating for many years.
Myself and many of this clique have “known” each other for the best part of 15 years.
We know each other not just through GN but through meet ups in real life. Just this last Saturday I was out with a member.

Cliques form wherever there is a group of people. It's human nature to gravitate to those with similar ideas and opinions to your own. In those cliques people may hesitate to disagree with a 'friend' but will criticise someone new to the group or one who thinks differently on other subjects.
This is just the way people are.

As we have seen it is down to the GNHQ mods what posts remain on a thread, or even what threads remain.

May as well say something else as well.

My opinion. It is easy to be in a group of people, in real life as well as online, and think you are the majority view.
Whereas in reality, and now talking about real life especailly, you go to a "big event", or even just shopping in a different town, and can see you are not necessarily.

Out of synch as ever 😀. Sorry - my comment above was to Oreo, and thanks to Grandmaofone and Wyllow for the support.