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Is this behaviour appropriate.

(202 Posts)

GNHQ have commented on this thread. Read here.

Tuliptree Sun 07-Jun-26 22:04:02

This thread is not about the rights and wrongs of the banning of Allira. There is an active second thread where the whole matter can be and is being discussed in detail for anyone who is interested. GNHQ has not deleted it ( nor the previous one). However, a group of posters on that thread decided to take their campaign onto other completely unrelated threads. It’s irritating at least when these posts pop up but matters reached a new low today when it was thought appropriate to bring mention of the matter onto the thread about Henry Nowak. What next? The bereavement thread? A thread about someone with a serious illness? Can you just stop it and keep the campaign where it belongs? Start more threads if you want for example but just butt out of unrelated threads.

Cossy Mon 08-Jun-26 16:53:41

Grandmaofone

did you not heed the word - exasperated

collectively, I genuinely believe posters have been endlessly patient, tolerant, kind but there is a limit

no one should be on a forum walking on eggshells,
treated like mushrooms, edged out of conversations,
by posters throwing themselves about over an erstwhile
poster
as though GNHQ are completely out of order without
the self reflection of a mirror

I don’t believe there is goodwill to all posters here Aveline
whilst a coterie of posters are disruptive, anxious, subversive,
deluded.
Perhaps there are many who would want a banned poster returned but you are behaving badly, strident, belligerent and bellicose, do not heed warning shots as you believe you know better when in fact a poster on the original thread laid it all out for you and the Allira fanclub in well researched detail
when I was informed that it was bollox! then in capital letters told it was libellous! and GNHQ allowed this to stand. They have been more than patient.
You do yourself no favours by these disruptive posts.
I’m tired of this, your group have wrecked any genuine goodwill here.
and Aveline, your sly jibe tells all

I think this post, is just as bad as the original post, if not worse, than the one Aveline posted.

Why oh why does anyone here speak for everyone else.

Out of respect for everyone I’m coming off this thread completely.

You all, can of course, do as you wish.

rafichagran Mon 08-Jun-26 16:50:42

GrannyGravy13

This thread has become toxic

Why? As far as I can see its posters saying they don't want the thread about Allira being commented on other unrelated posts and I agree. I find nothing toxic about that.

Maremia Mon 08-Jun-26 16:48:56

Are we permitted to continue?

Maremia Mon 08-Jun-26 16:47:49

Other comments about other site stuff, such as like buttons, bookmarks.

Maremia Mon 08-Jun-26 16:47:10

We are continuing the Thread with other comments now, in case you hadn't noticed, but feel free to pull it if you so desire.

AGAA4 Mon 08-Jun-26 16:37:17

Sorry Annie from Gransnet!

Grandmaofone Mon 08-Jun-26 16:37:09

did you not heed the word - exasperated

collectively, I genuinely believe posters have been endlessly patient, tolerant, kind but there is a limit

no one should be on a forum walking on eggshells,
treated like mushrooms, edged out of conversations,
by posters throwing themselves about over an erstwhile
poster
as though GNHQ are completely out of order without
the self reflection of a mirror

I don’t believe there is goodwill to all posters here Aveline
whilst a coterie of posters are disruptive, anxious, subversive,
deluded.
Perhaps there are many who would want a banned poster returned but you are behaving badly, strident, belligerent and bellicose, do not heed warning shots as you believe you know better when in fact a poster on the original thread laid it all out for you and the Allira fanclub in well researched detail
when I was informed that it was bollox! then in capital letters told it was libellous! and GNHQ allowed this to stand. They have been more than patient.
You do yourself no favours by these disruptive posts.
I’m tired of this, your group have wrecked any genuine goodwill here.
and Aveline, your sly jibe tells all

Mollygo Mon 08-Jun-26 16:34:32

Please GNHQ, could you consider closing this thread?
I’m not reporting this post, I’m reporting the fact that this thread and the comments on it are indeed becoming toxic and that’s true regardless of whether we can just scroll on by.
The whole matter of that young man’s murder is toxic enough without any help from us.

fancythat Mon 08-Jun-26 16:33:48

AGAA4

I'm just worried about losing posters I have come to know over the eight years I've been posting. Lily from Gransnet has asked that we don't post the campaign on other threads so it would be risky if this persists.
I still think a new thread would be the best way forward.

You mean AnnueGransnet?
Or have I missed a lilyGransnet post?

Tuliptree Mon 08-Jun-26 16:33:22

spamming

Tuliptree Mon 08-Jun-26 16:32:32

I actually thought it would have been a good thing if this thread had been allowed to fade away especially after Annie’s post. Unfortunately, there are some posters who can’t accept that Allira almost certainly isn’t coming back and/or that their behaviour in slamming isn’t acceptable to or appreciated by many other posters. You have your thread. You can have more. I just don’t get it.

Doodledog Mon 08-Jun-26 16:32:04

Tizliz

Doodledog

Do you know how to remove a bookmark, anyone. I have set them accidentally before, and on long threads it's annoying to always be sent back to the bookmarked post.

Don’t you just set another bookmark?

Oh, I didn't think of that 😀. Thanks.

Aveline, obviously it's fine to disagree, and no hard feelings from me. I just think the campaign is more likely to succeed if it stops annoying other posters. HQ is not going to show us that posting all over threads will make them change their minds - if they did, it would encourage similar behaviour every time we don't like their decisions. I understand why you started the campaign, and support its aims, just not the tactics.

AGAA4 Mon 08-Jun-26 16:31:24

I'm just worried about losing posters I have come to know over the eight years I've been posting. Lily from Gransnet has asked that we don't post the campaign on other threads so it would be risky if this persists.
I still think a new thread would be the best way forward.

Tuliptree Mon 08-Jun-26 16:26:13

GrannyGravy13

This thread has become toxic

Well you don’t have to come on it do you if it’s that dreadful.

Tuliptree Mon 08-Jun-26 16:24:07

Aveline

Ooh. Now who's policing threads!!

I don’t think you seem to understand the situation at all. It’s not policing threads to say that you should be keeping your campaign off other threads. I can understand that you are upset that you can’t get your friend back but really just start another thread about it if the current one isn’t offering you the support you need.

rafichagran Mon 08-Jun-26 16:22:00

Aveline

Tuliptree I'm understanding a great deal.

What don't you understand about posters thinking it is unacceptable to post on the Henry Nowak thread?
The whole Henry Nowak incident is tragic and people do not need to see comments about Allira's banning which is trivial by comparison.
I think your idea of going on other threads Aveline is very wrong.

GrannyGravy13 Mon 08-Jun-26 16:16:30

This thread has become toxic

petra Mon 08-Jun-26 16:13:06

butterandjam

petra

Flippin2

I'm relatively new too,I don't post a lot but I do read things that interest me,there is a definite clique on the site ,reminds me of the mums at the school gates,if you don't fit you're not in and yes I noticed the comments on the Henry Nowak thread and agree they're not necessary and should remain on the appropriate page

What you call a clique happens on all SM sites that have been operating for many years.
Myself and many of this clique have “known” each other for the best part of 15 years.
We know each other not just through GN but through meet ups in real life. Just this last Saturday I was out with a member.

I don't need to know who Flippin2 met on Saturday, to hear and understand her.

As a newbie, her stated POV has exactly the same value to this thread as anybody else's.

You obviously didn’t understand. If you read the post I said just this last Saturday I was out with a member
Your post illustrates just how much bad feeling is caused by members not reading the post as it is written.

Aveline Mon 08-Jun-26 16:09:48

Ooh. Now who's policing threads!!

Grandmaofone Mon 08-Jun-26 16:00:48

Aveline

Doodledog I'm invariably in agreement with you but not, sadly,on this matter. I'm left feeling that we are being kettled in to the one thread about our missing friend. All the easier for GN mods to forget my dear.

have you not been listening?

Allira is not more important than every other exasperated
Gransnet poster
you are being kettled in one thread, for the greater good of everyone else here who needs to feel free to post without rancour
ergo
kindly keep your campaign off other threads

Gransnet moderators describe the site and threads

we are here as guests and dependent upon their goodwill

it isn’t essential for you to feel sad,
only to toe the proscribed line when
all will be well

Tizliz Mon 08-Jun-26 15:38:22

Doodledog

Do you know how to remove a bookmark, anyone. I have set them accidentally before, and on long threads it's annoying to always be sent back to the bookmarked post.

Don’t you just set another bookmark?

AGAA4 Mon 08-Jun-26 15:09:53

Just a thought Aveline 😊

Tuliptree Mon 08-Jun-26 15:09:21

Aveline

Tuliptree I'm understanding a great deal.

Please explain what you understand a great deal - it might help me

AGAA4 Mon 08-Jun-26 15:09:03

Aveline

Doodledog I'm invariably in agreement with you but not, sadly,on this matter. I'm left feeling that we are being kettled in to the one thread about our missing friend. All the easier for GN mods to forget my dear.

Maybe start a new thread about Allira? What we liked about her or remembered? Just a suggestion but may carry more weight than one or two posts on random threads.

Aveline Mon 08-Jun-26 15:07:17

Tuliptree I'm understanding a great deal.