Do you know what?

I do remember that Phoenix, one of the funniest clips on TV. Do you really feel that bad?

Yep!

I'm with you on this Phoenix. We are not foolish, naive old ladies, as we are sometimes made to feel, we are in fact smart and savvy.

This is not the GN I joined six years ago. I'm reluctant to post much now.

That got me started on watching TV bloopers! Very addictive!
Cheer up Phoenix - vent away (until this thread goes too!) and if a certain person could just be aware of their possible propensity to pick nits and stop blaming everything on misandry , life might be smoother all round. Or should some of us start citing misogyny? It gets boooooooring.

I know several people who no longer post as they feel GN has changed so much since they joined

What have I missed?

GN is changing, not sure I am enjoying it much?

I joined GN at the beginning of lockdown and was surprised at the level of vitriol in some of the posts, but I really enjoy the kinder posts and stick with those. But the thing that's always puzzled me is why people even respond to the nasty posters. Surely the best approach is not to reply at all, then their thread would go nowhere?

I suppose there have been changes for all of us with the current situation and it is noticeable in the posts on here now, its easier to vent on here than in real life.
I find HQ to be inconsistent, some posters can say pretty much anything others are reprimanded for small perceived infringements. I do get tired of us being treated as if we were seven and not seventy ( apologies to younger members )

I stick with gn because I would miss my 'friends'. It's not really the vitriolic people who get to me but the trolls that lure people I find a real pain. They are harder to avoid and we are not allowed to say anything and some people are badly hurt.

MellowYellow Wed 23-Sep-20 07:33:11
But the thing that's always puzzled me is why people even respond to the nasty posters. Surely the best approach is not to reply at all, then their thread would go nowhere?

You've got it in one. Ignore them, you can't start a fight in an empty room. Don't be drawn in, your comment, no matter how eloquent, will only attract further vitriol.

I haven’t been on GN long. A couple of things though.... it does sometimes seem that words like bulllying, vitriol, bashing are brought out as soon as there’s a disagreement ? Along with “don’t read it if you don’t like it”
I have to say though I wouldn’t probably stay much .longer if it became all Sweetness and light, recipes and housework!
I like a frivolous thread as well as more serious ones

Think you’ve had a hard time on here though lately Phoenix! Yesterday’s was really OTT.

Oh and by the way the only time I ever come across the word “vitriol” is on GN!

I do not understand why some posters are allowed to return. I have had my wrists slapped a lot recently and my feeling is I was trying to stand up for myself or find out the truth.

Anyway, we are having a break at present- may be a long pause would be a better description! We will have to gird our loins and be ready for the next onslaught.

I have been on GN for some years, because of circumstances
my only friends were here, many don’t post now, I don’t post much, but stay because there are still some friends here.

I don’t like Gransnet now.

Oh Annie, that is sad.
I only joined last week and I think it's lovely here.
I've seen s bit of nastiness, but it seems few and far between.
Perhaps I've been lucky.
I was treated with much suspicion initially, but that was cleared up quickly.

It has changed over the years and not for the better. I have met in real life some very nice people and I email others and have been doing so for years.

On the whole, I stay with one thread because even a simple thread can become so contentious so quickly. Arguments and paper bags spring to mind.

There are still very many kind, decent people here even if they do not post regularly.

Obviously, I've missed another contentious thread. I must say that I'm not looking at GN nearly as often these days. I do check the forums but if there are posts from certain posters I just avoid.

Patronising lectures.

Lucca but isn't 'vitriol' a lovely word?

Phoenix, I didn't know you had been attacked - I'm sorry. It's such a shame that people barge in and spoil things for one of the nice people. There you go - damned with faint praise!! I'm sure you know what I mean.

I've been on Gransnet for a few years. Until the past few months I had never been aware of any unpleasantness. I dont know whether it has always been there but I havent noticed it as didnt read as many threads. If it is a genuinely new occurrence I wonder if it's a reflection of the anxiety and conflict in wider society at the moment. I'm on a diabetic support forum and there is a definite change in some people's posts ,some people are downright nasty and show zero empathy or tolerance for those whose viewpoint is different to theirs.
There is much that is kind and supportive here. I only really started posting this year and I must admit I'm wary. I think sometimes its healthier to mentally agree to disagree rather than engage in unnecessary conflict with someone I dont know, life is difficult enough at the moment.

No idea what happened re an 'attack' so can't comment.

GN and other Forums are reflecting what is going around us- and tensions have been rising due to the very serious situation we are facing as a country, both with Brexit, and Covid- aggravated by the truly frustrating and confusing restrictions we all find ourselves in- making us even more sensitive.

Attacks are not acceptable, this way or that. However, is some threads are upsetting you, you have the total freedom to avoid them.

'*there is only one way to avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing and be nothing*' Aristotle.

Dorset you should have been here during the height of the Brexit furore!

There’s always been ‘lively’ discussions, yes, even vitriolic. What is emerging recently is something more insidious and is frankly spoiling GN for many.

The cries of misandry just may me laugh to be honest, I cant get too upset about it, women talking about their lives has always been difficult for some to hear.

Yes as soon as I see certain posters I go elsewhere - either because I don't believe them to be who they claim to be or because they can't get it into their heads that a lot of the posts are 'tongue in cheek' and posted with affection!!